Are they really after me or is just my silly little thoughts ?

I recently had a terrible experience that left me a pretty good trauma with a little spice of severe trust issues and paranoia, at first I thought it was normal I mean I have been betrayed, hurt, and humiliated by the people who were supposed to protect me and supposed to be my safe place so dah.

But it got worse I became so paranoid that anyone on the street looked at me I thought they were coming after me to hurt me or watching me. I thought it was normal and it would all go away soon once I go back to my normal life UNTIL, one day I was going back to school to my normal life and I wanted to dye my hair red because I thought that the red hair really represents me so I asked my older sister to buy me one (at that time I couldn’t go out), and I got in a huge fight with my mom she didn’t want me to dye my hair red because my middle eastern family has this idea that if I dyed my hair red I’m going to be a bad girl and dishonor the family, but I managed to convince my sister to get one. I was planning to dye my hair in the morning before school, my sister texted me in the night asking “Did you dye your hair yet? Tell me what happens with you”, and my paranoid brain made me think that my family put something the bottle to get back at me because I didn’t listen to them and ruin my hair or get bold and I got SO scared I didn’t know what to do so finally I’ve decided to test it on a little strand of my hair, of course nothing happened. At that moment I realized that I wasn’t okay and that’s definitely not normal but of course, I didn’t know what was wrong with me.

I used to have a few little hallucinations like little white circles and shadows. Before all this, I got diagnosed with bipolar, bpd, and depression so that was normal but after this It got really bad I hear voices and see stuff no one sees, and still I hadn’t figured out what was going on with me.

The last day I was doing research to write an article about schizophrenia and I can’t tell how I was shocked, I was a bit relieved, a bit scared, and a little sad about what’s happening to me.

Our perceptions of various mental illnesses are frequently shaped by the way they are portrayed in books or popular culture. These nearly always exaggerate or portray those illnesses incorrectly.

Schizophrenia is a complex illness that starts with paranoia and progresses to hallucinations.

Understanding schizophrenia can improve our ability to relate to persons who experience it and to see the spectrum nature of all mental health.

The better you understand a mental illness, the more you can begin to deal with it. And the more you comprehend it, the easier it will be for you to relate to it. The majority of mental disorders exist on a spectrum rather than in a binary. The majority of people will fall somewhere along the mental health spectrum. Yes, definitions are needed in the medical and psychological professions so that we can declare, “This person is a schizophrenic and this person is not.” There are many levels of schizophrenia, as we’ve seen.

It’s as if schizophrenia is a road, with red-eyed goats at the finish and anxiety and paranoia at the beginning. On that road, somewhere, we are all lying. Understanding this reality makes it easier to de-stigmatize and better comprehend schizophrenia (and any other mental health illnesses).

Now let’s talk for real if you or any of you or your loved ones have any of these symptoms ASK for help please this is not something you can deal with it on your own because I almost have done something really bad, but of course, ask the experts and the professionals.