Most recently published stories in Psyche.
The Dark Side of The Moon
On April 4th, my chest ached. I wasn't physically hurt, nothing had impacted my breastbone or anything . . . but sometimes I got like this. A restless irritation buzzing in my limbs, a tight chest that felt like a heavy weight was pressing down on it, and this urge like I was going to cry (and a serious fear that I wouldn't be able to stop). I was not comfortable standing and pacing, nor was it any better to curl up into as tight a ball as possible. My existence was discomfort and my focus was unrelentingly focused on that.
Brian Solis said, “Memories are the architecture of our identity.” Memories give us the ability to be aware of ourselves and alter our existence. Without memory, how do I even know I exist? I feel as though I am floating in the plasma of time, unable to return to my past, and unable to move forward without it. They say it is my own mind keeping me here. It feels ironic when all I think about is leaving this place.
A night to remember
My body began to tremble as I fixated on the bottle of Merlot in front of me. ‘I took the liberty of ordering my favorite wine. It is from the town I grew up in Bordeaux. Actually, when I was younger…’
This is Real Life
INTRODUCTION My story is one that isnt often told, even though the events happen every day around the world. It contains events of child abuse and molestation, drug abuse and death. Some parts may not be for the faint of heart, but more exposure to these kinds of things needs to happen. The childhood that my brothers and I experiences ultimately let to a path that resulted in my younger brothers death as a middle aged adult. Unfortunately, he was steered onto this path at a very early age, and was set up for failure in life, starting as a child.
I'm Proud of My Culture, But Not Too Proud
It’s pretty typical for first generation Americans to “grow into” their culture. If you’ve been around the block a few times you know the routine. Grow up getting teased for your culture, mocked by stereotypes, and trying desperately to “blend in.” Eventually, you go to college, make more friends within your culture, maybe even join an ethnic dance group, cultural organization, or religious organization. Four years fly by and you graduate with a newfound appreciation and love for your culture.
Lennox Head Surf Club Kiosk
Waking in a small fibro house, mind busy. It is 5:32 AM. Strolling down the sidewalk to the nature strip adjacent to Seven Mile Beach, the street is empty. One familiar vehicle soon approaches before driving past to purchase their dawn brew. The town is growing exponentially, but there are many residents I still know.
Always Google Your Date: The Second Chapter
After a bomb, there's always fallout. Cleanup that needs to be dealt with. Survivors' wounds tended to, debris gathered, etc. The fallout of a relationship is no different.
How Can I Make It Through This Craving?
Of course, the most uncomfortable withdrawal symptoms can be cravings - the intense pull, the overwhelming desire to take the substance or conduct the activity. Cravings are downright cruel. It seems when you commit to cease your substance or activity, these demons dance around you, tease you and taunt you back into self-harm. These cravings can be heartbreaking, especially when you begin to see your mind scheming ways to get out of the detox to return to your addiction. This is where you see the very depth of your soul, the yearning for something more, the longing to relieve the pain. You also realise just how resourceful and persistent your mind is. Just imagine if you could apply this same time, energy and passion to a noble pursuit!
Hold the door, offer your jacket, say please and thank you, buy her flowers. Put a napkin on your lap, never eat the last slice of cake, know the difference between your soup spoon and dessert spoon. Never ask a woman her age. Don’t just ask how her day was, listen to what she says. Give up your seat on the metro, treat those in the service industry with respect and dignity, walk her home, never leave the party without thanking the host.
3 Radically Simple Ways to Practice Self-care
If you are probably looking for quicker, more efficient means to improve your life, you are not alone. Not all of us intuitively know how best to care for ourselves. We could all use some extra help navigating an increasingly complicated daily environment.
Small is the word most often used to describe me. It is not meant to be an insult, just an objective observation. Sometimes it is even used in a positive context, a synonym for cute. If I stand as straight as possible, I am a mere five foot six inches. My weight fluctuates between 95 and 105 pounds.
Does an 'influencer' do more harm than good?
The phrase 'social media is fake' is tossed around so often that it has become a cliché amongst the 'influencer' community. The importance of self-love and self-care is brandished in a sparkly filter and edited to make the 'influencer' look more aesthetically pleasing and so, undermines and contradicts the actual message they are advertising. The irony being that 'social media is fake' - and that is all of it. Every. Single. Thing. This is what many young people do not understand. When your favourite 'influencer' is talking about self-love in front of a filter to make their waist look smaller on a video, they are being fake as well. They are promoting the idea of self-love from a place of great narcissism and bad intentions. Why? So that you do not use said filters and editing to make yourself look a certain way, but they continue to. Again, why? Well, because they want to make themselves feel like they are better than everyone else and because of the vapid nature of an 'influencer' - they focus purely on the appearance and nothing else. Intelligence, personality and personal qualities do not matter to them. If they can feel like their appearance is better than yours then they will promote this in any way possible. It is a senseless and sociopathic act of narcissism.