humor
"Humor is what binds humans together and makes difficult times just a little less painful; Sometimes you can't help but laugh. "
Quarantine Queen
1. You have yet to step out of your house in anything but slides. Step out of your Louis Boutons and into your slip on's. Comfort is key when it comes to keeping it cool this summer. You know how to rock any shoe with your capsule wardrobe and that doesn't exclude a one step - low key slipper.
By Ellie Fowler4 years ago in Humans
Captain Oh Yeah
I was wearing my black, collared, slick, long sleeve shirt that I had just bought from the Gap to show it off on that particular Friday evening. It made my beer gut look like it was gone (you know how wearing the color black makes chunky people look a little thinner), and it gave me this mysterious panther-like look while all the silver rings I was wearing on my lanky fingers embellished the blackness of this awesome shirt. This particular shirt was a huge girl magnet too. By far, it was my favorite shirt for a long time.
By Bazooka Teaches4 years ago in Humans
The Wipe
I was out with my girlfriend at a bar in Hollywood drinking and celebrating. It was a “whatever” night for us to celebrate that night. Suddenly, I had the urge to take a number-two (yes a big ol’ dump), and I really didn’t want to do it because pinching a loaf at a public place, especially a bar, is just embarrassing. However, this loaf was coming out like a bat out of Hell.
By Bazooka Teaches4 years ago in Humans
Coming or Going
i WOULDNT say I saw it coming becaus I never did. I’ve always had good relationships with the dudes I messed with, I wouldn’t call them EXCEPTIONAL OR TYPICAL, but I was in love and I was happy in my eyes so i was Me! I know I treat my man the way he deserves. So I get treated equally good. But yet this one guy came in and After that, shit will nevva be the same...
By FairyTailDora4 years ago in Humans
The Scarf
It was nearing prom season in my last year of high school, I had made some friends but had yet to meet someone I’d want to date. I’d go visit my Mom at her new place every so often, she told me that I really should be thinking about getting a date for prom. Even when I told her that most of my friend group didn’t have dates, her advice stood firm that going sans date wasn’t fun, I’d regret it, and they’d all be sorry, trust me! So I went and hunted down a boyfriend, through one of my good school friends. Was I attracted to him? Not in the least. Did I now get to tell my Mom I had a prom date? Sure did. He was quite patient with me, given that I was vastly and deeply emotionally constipated especially at that time. I liked the company and he was kind enough, along with agreeing to be my prom date. It was nice having a friend to sleep next to, key word “friend.”I don’t think he caught on to the red flags that I clearly brought to the table, the main one being that I held my breath when we made out. There was just so much saliva and I could not understand why, but I had nothing to compare it to so for a while I assumed that this is just what all kissing must be like. I think something I believed to be a major drawback was how he ate popcorn, it ruined all of our relationship potential in my mind.
By Camille Cote4 years ago in Humans
Dreadlock Disaster
I used to frequent this dive bar in my 20’s that has unsurprisingly been shut down in recent years. On any given night one could never be sure what to expect, especially regarding the patrons. Ranging from rowdy underaged maritime boys to full fledged biker gang members, it was usually a gamble. Regardless of the haphazard crowd, it was always a good time. I attribute this to the fact that it offered karaoke almost every single night. There’s nothing more unifying than collectively butchering some of history’s greatest hits, all while throwing back a pint.
By Reptile Dysfunction 4 years ago in Humans
'What the hell did I just do?'
Excuse the cliche, but I wonder how much in gold I'd be worth if I had a nugget for every cock-up, or imagined cock-up, I'd managed through my life without having died yet. I would estimate enough to not end up where I bloody started nearly twenty years later. The most irritating of cliches or memes or inspirational quotes is 'life is about the journey, not the destination'. I beg to differ, because if I ended up where I started nearly twenty years ago, what does it mean for me? I'm Benjamin sodding Button? What... sucking on a tit before I end up being hurled back into the womb? I'll try not to be negative - it could, after all, be something to look forward to.
By Dawn Sandells4 years ago in Humans