The panic started as a shiver at the base of her neck. It travelled down her spine like an uncurling snake. The perfume was unmistakable. The citrus sweet smell that had paralysed her 15 years ago. She listened to the voice, yes, it had the same raspy pitch. It was her, the person from Suki’s nightmare. Fifteen years later and she still wore the same awful perfume.

When I am blocked creatively, I often search Google, Pinterest, or Instagram for inspiration and insight into the world around me. This always helps me to get "unstuck" and seems to better inform my writing. Several years ago I stumbled upon the Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows. Created by John Koenig, the site is dedicated to inventing words (neologisms) to describe the emotions that we all feel but don't have a word in the English language that defines them. Each original word and its definition aims to fill a gap in the English language and although the words are made-up, they are carefully crafted using proper etymology. A self-proclaimed lexophile, I have found DOS to be word porn at its best.

I hated shopping during the holiday season. I tried to avoid the hustle and bustle of people looking for the perfect dinner ideas. I especially hated this holiday season because I would be spending it alone. Looking at all the happy couples flooded my soul with a cocktail of emotions.

You refuse to look ahead. At this point, we are defined by what we are against. If we were in this together, both of us would see the shoreline beyond the rough waters. Andrew, I feel as though you are filled by an empty promise. Our future should not rest in fear. The differences between us could be resolved peacefully, instead of living in an ideal dream. We will pursue positive engagement that builds a new opportunity that you would see. Never let a good thing pass down the road; open up your eyes, and face reality. I do not want to be strung through an unnecessary trudge, I need someone who’s down to earth. Why turn your back on me now? Consequences will come your way, even though I know you can’t stay forever. Right now, being around you does not feel quite right. I do not understand what happened; we used to be tight. The distant presence tears at me each day. I have trouble finding my way. Why hide your feelings, because Andrew, you are needed by my side. Although, I would hate to see you give in due to obligation; this would only lead to frustration. Instead, follow your heart and I promise I will do my part. I am determined, rest assured, and we’ll be able to move past this one step at a time. Please do not live in a lie out of fear because a resolution is coming near.

“Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” The old nursery rhyme played over and over in her mind as the barrage of insults kept coming. For hours she had sat in a stony silence with tears streaming down her face and reciting the rhyme to herself.

Being 21 years of age and realizing that the only "romantic" relationship you've ever had was in the 7th grade with a boy who ended up transferring schools half way through the year and never responded to any text after forces you to sit in front of a massive mirror for an intense session of self reflection.

I don’t think it’s a secret that the MOGAI community is complicated, or that there are a lot of misconceptions about the many, many identities encompassed within that umbrella. From contention around the term "queer," to questions about what the “A” in "LGBTQIA+" stands for, there’s a lot to learn and remember and unpack—and a lot of misinformation to contend with. Moreover, when dealing with such a large community, it’s inevitable that you encounter differences of perspective and opinion, which unfortunately can turn heated.

There has long been contentious and problematic language surrounding the LGBTQIA+ community. Even the aforementioned acronym can be controversial, as our understanding of non-heterosexual, non-cis/non-binary, and generally non-normative identities expand and more letters are needed to encompass the whole spectrum. One word often used for such an umbrella term is “queer,” but this isn’t universally accepted, either.

Peter and Fred boarded a plane six days after I arrived in Beijing. I was busying myself snapping photos at every turn, recording expenses and conversations, for the Travel feature. The sunlight slanted across my frequent haunt, the Palace Museum, in the early mornings of a beautiful spring. I satisfied my homesickness for Washington, D.C. by wandering through this temple to the arts. For the sake of the article, I’d also visited the typical tourist destinations of China, and was now preparing to tour various Buddhist temples in and around the city. I set out for Biyun Si, the Temple of the Azure Clouds. I never got to any temple beyond it.

Have you ever been inspired to help someone with a disability, or support an agency or group advocating for a disability?

I often wonder what it would be like if I stayed by your side, if we never broke up. My apartment felt empty the minute you left, and I stuffed your portion of the bed with silence and alcohol.

A relationship begins to decay when one or both parties stop trying. Though relationships shouldn’t be work, they do require the effort of both parties. Whether your relationship has been struggling for some time and you want to get it back on the right track, or you simply want to make sure your relationship stays strong, there are a few things you can do on a daily basis to strengthen your relationship, and maintain your bond with your partner.

We often make snap judgements about a person based on their appearance. While this may seem unfair, we are all guilty of doing this. How you dress and present yourself to the world speaks volumes about who you are and how you feel about yourself.

You may have a close friend or family member who is a serial abuser and not know it. It’s extremely common for abusers engaging in physical and/or psychological abuse to mask their activities by playing the victim. Would you be able to see through an abuser’s lies when they tell you their false version of events? How can you detect when someone is telling the truth about an abusive ex partner?

It was an October Saturday. The air was crisp and clear with the essence of Autumn in the air. Since the air exuded pumpkin spice and sweaters, I decided to stay in and cook that night. The week had been strenuous, but the excitement was scheduled to arrive. The love of my life, AJ suggested that we meet at my place and have dinner and watch our favorite movies.

My life has always had its ups and downs, just like everyone elses'. I have faced discrimination for my choices, and I have been praised for them. It has definitely never been easy... but I get by. Things got worse as I grew older, that is until I learned to not care what other people think. This story starts when I was thirteen, back when I had just started high school.

Here I start, in the raspberry field, falling once again, starting this cycle one more time. I wear my pained look, I’m joyless. I am the dumper, but I feel so guilty, so empty. I’m erupting at the bottom of it all. I’ll be climbing my way through the dense forest of feelings and pain. I’m driving me mad.

She seems smart, looks good and all you want to do is talk to her but you can’t. Where do you even begin? What do you say to her? The truth is that you are scared. You don’t want to embarrass yourself. You don’t want to be rejected and so you are still standing there, looking for how you can tailor make the perfect outcome. Well, you can’t. You just have to put yourself out there. We cannot guarantee you the outcome but here’s how to increase your odds:

Every relationship I have been in has eventually become disappointing.

Men can be very difficult to buy presents for. Either he's the guy who has everything, or he's the guy who doesn't want anything, or he wants some incredibly obscure thing that you're going to need to budget for. When it comes to off-the-cuff presents, there just aren't the same go-to gifts that are generally acceptable for women. Of course you can buy him flowers or jewelry, but there's no guarantee that it'll be anything other than a quirky joke. Here's a list of five easy presents that your guy friend probably either hasn't bought for himself yet, or he could stand to have more.

A friend had contacted me from across the other side of the world in the UK. She is a good Christian friend with whom I experienced some very meaningful prayer times and understanding of the Bible because of her care. This was during a time I lived in Japan which was were I had converted to Christianity in 2002. I later became Muslim in 2010. Seventeen years later she contacted me recently having been concerned about the fate of a divorced Muslim female. The concern was "There would be no chance of her being able to remarry" and that it is "the reality for most Muslim women."

This is the story of how I went from being single, to getting married, to leaving my husband, to falling in love with someone else, to a surprise pregnancy, to anxiously waiting for these divorce papers, so I can sign them and finally be free. A little background: I was born in Maryland, and raised in Virginia. I met my soon-to-be ex husband in high school.

When I was 12 years old, I remember one of my greatest wishes was to fall in love with the perfect guy and get married by the time I was 20 years old. Coming from a family of 12 brothers and sisters, and being the youngest of the six girls, I was only following the examples I got from my older sisters. My mother brought us up with the conviction that a woman's role in this world was to find herself a good, hardworking, and loving guy, get married, have lots of children and live happily ever after.

How can your life be ruined even before you started? Maybe not ruined, but certainly damaged. Such a damaged human being from the start. I always felt disconnected from every person, but most of all, family. I would be the one who was a goody-goody, while my sisters rebelled. They always treated me like the annoying youngest sister. The only one who wouldn't go out. The one always upset. Always jealous and longing for love and attention.

I remember back as far as four and a half years old. Vivid memories of living in a basement apartment in North Denver, my Mom being on ADC and the County Nurse coming to visit and bringing a box filled with staples: rice, cheese, powdered eggs, milk, etc. I can still see the box on top of the table, way above my head. I can still feel the sensation of climbing up on the chair to look at all the goods being pulled from the box.

I was the second-born son out of three. I was the middle child. I grew up in an average, hard working, middle class family. I had a seemingly normal childhood. I was a B average student. I was a terrific athlete. I had a big dream of playing professional football. I had no doubt in my mind I was capable of doing so. I was confident, driven and motivated to accomplish my goal. I was an unstoppable force. I wanted to make my family proud. An unexpected football injury in high school would change the course of my life. I would become a victim of America's opioid epidemic. My addiction, however, would teach me the importance of family. I would also learn the power of unconditional love, which is something the world needs more of.

Throughout school I always felt like there was pressure that you needed an army of friends. Friends that would back you in any situation, maybe even help avoid any bullying if that was to occur—the more friends, the cooler you were, right? You couldn't be more wrong.

Making acquaintances is a breeze. The real work is moving the needle towards something more than those surface level interactions. Whether it is with a new friend, potential love interest, mother-in-law, or sister, here are ten things you can do to cut through superficiality and actually get to know them in a real and meaningful way.

It's hard to accept the fact that someone has died and you never had enough time with them.

When I am blocked creatively, I often search Google, Pinterest, or Instagram for inspiration and insight into the world around me. This always helps me to get "unstuck" and seems to better inform my writing. Several years ago I stumbled upon the Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows. Created by John Koenig, the site is dedicated to inventing words (neologisms) to describe the emotions that we all feel but don't have a word in the English language that defines them. Each original word and its definition aims to fill a gap in the English language and although the words are made-up, they are carefully crafted using proper etymology. A self-proclaimed lexophile, I have found DOS to be word porn at its best.

She always tried to tell him it was his soul she fell in love with, yet it was his presence she craved. Empty moments filled with nothing was what she became accustomed to. She tried to love him like she thought he wanted, yet in the end, she saw she should have loved him the way he needed. He never believed she really loved his soul, as he told her he didn’t have one and instead, he preyed on her generous nature and kind ways; he manipulated time and space daily, to push her to her limits. He was the wolf in sheep’s clothing. She saw in his pearly white smile the truth of how hard he could really bite, but she knew that part of loving him was loving his demons, too. But, in the end she let his demons feed on her. She took on the role of the victim; she forgot who she was. She was the fire in her emotions, stronger than any woman, for she felt the pain, every inch of it, and still got up every day with love in her heart and a smile on her face. She fell into the role she played, but never really felt like herself. Outsiders looked on like she was weak for staying oh so many times. People would tell her to learn to love herself. Yet she did. The small piece of the puzzle that no one ever saw was she loved herself, in the true meaning of the word. She honoured a karmic bond made before this body, and she knew, in balance, they would teach each other lessons about who and what they really are. Because, thats the beauty of love: It never really dies. It’s just harder for a blackened soul to feel. So they parted, perhaps this time for good. She saw him, into him, through him, and all of him—yet the wolf never removed the sheep’s clothing until the aftermath came upon her.

Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about guilt and how it can be both a positive and negative emotion. That guilty feeling we get in the pit of our stomachs is there to let us know when our actions are not aligned with what we perceive to be right.

I hated shopping during the holiday season. I tried to avoid the hustle and bustle of people looking for the perfect dinner ideas. I especially hated this holiday season because I would be spending it alone. Looking at all the happy couples flooded my soul with a cocktail of emotions.

Everyone has a story to tell and today is the perfect day to share them with the world. Today is National Coming Out Day, which is observed every year on October 11th. It’s a day to celebrate coming out and also raising awareness for the LGBT community. Back then, coming out to your friends, family, colleagues, etc., wasn’t easy, and in most instances, you were disowned by them. I wrote an article about Boston’s so-called “straight pride” event over a month ago and I went in on them, especially when it first started making headlines and caused controversy. Many straight people still complain about why Pride Month, LGBT History Month, and LGBT rights exist. It’s because they are among the few groups of people who get discriminated against on a regular basis and are being refused services and other accommodations on religious grounds. October is LGBT History Month, so it’s very important to educate everyone of LGBT advocates, heroes, politicians, icons, past and present, of the sacrifices and positive actions they have done for everyone in that community. Before I share my coming out story, I want to point out a few things.

I don’t think it’s a secret that the MOGAI community is complicated, or that there are a lot of misconceptions about the many, many identities encompassed within that umbrella. From contention around the term "queer," to questions about what the “A” in "LGBTQIA+" stands for, there’s a lot to learn and remember and unpack—and a lot of misinformation to contend with. Moreover, when dealing with such a large community, it’s inevitable that you encounter differences of perspective and opinion, which unfortunately can turn heated.

Let's be clear, there are only FOUR negative types of people in your life. No matter how you sum it up, they all fall in to these categories:

Some general relationship advice—I have generally had very good relationships—and they have ended when one or more of these criteria were not met on their end:

It is commonly said by countless females who are T (Thinking) types that they struggled to fit in with other girls or women all throughout their lives. Why is this? I specifically want to look more in-depth at the INTJ female type and why she may feel especially feel alienated for the majority of her life. According to the website Caeer Planner, only 0.9% of women are truly INTJ's. Also, if you notice, most of the T types for females are less common. Here are five major reasons why I believe INTJ women will often times feel like they don't fit in to their gender.

“Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” The old nursery rhyme played over and over in her mind as the barrage of insults kept coming. For hours she had sat in a stony silence with tears streaming down her face and reciting the rhyme to herself.

I woke up the next morning in a daze. My alarm blared its loud melody to wake me from an angry slumber. I had no desire to get up and join my girls for brunch.

Darren let out a deep, worried sigh. “Fuck.” Joyce sat patiently picking at her hash browns as he took in the news. An uncomfortable silence lingered, before Darren offered his hesitant thoughts. “Okay. Okay, well, fine. We’ll be fine. I’m doing good at work; we can move to the suburbs, somewhere where the schools are good. You might need to quit your job, but I can take care of us. I’m sure my parents would—"

You refuse to look ahead. At this point, we are defined by what we are against. If we were in this together, both of us would see the shoreline beyond the rough waters. Andrew, I feel as though you are filled by an empty promise. Our future should not rest in fear. The differences between us could be resolved peacefully, instead of living in an ideal dream. We will pursue positive engagement that builds a new opportunity that you would see. Never let a good thing pass down the road; open up your eyes, and face reality. I do not want to be strung through an unnecessary trudge, I need someone who’s down to earth. Why turn your back on me now? Consequences will come your way, even though I know you can’t stay forever. Right now, being around you does not feel quite right. I do not understand what happened; we used to be tight. The distant presence tears at me each day. I have trouble finding my way. Why hide your feelings, because Andrew, you are needed by my side. Although, I would hate to see you give in due to obligation; this would only lead to frustration. Instead, follow your heart and I promise I will do my part. I am determined, rest assured, and we’ll be able to move past this one step at a time. Please do not live in a lie out of fear because a resolution is coming near.

As I sit here in bed, with my three-week-old daughter laying in the tot beside me and my fiancé at work overnight, emotions run through me. My future; her future; our future.

My eyes slowly open, bringing me back into consciousness. They close again for a brief moment, and it feels as though I am tethered to a dream, a scene that I don’t quite remember. I feel comfortable, knowing that the dream wasn’t a bad one, and that I was being lulled into the real world slowly and happily.

Sunday September 29th, 2019 12 PM:

What if you didn’t have love? What would you do? Would you give up on the world and everyone in it, or would you keep looking until you found it? These are questions that Anna asked herself over and over for many years. Yes, years—not days, weeks or months. She felt like the loneliest married person alive.

I admit it: I am a huge fan of the show My 90 Day Fiancé, and so is my husband. Every Sunday and Monday nights, we are hooked on this show. The rest of the week, we like to mimic and make fun of the cast couples. It entertains us so much that we even watch the reruns on Fridays.

Being 21 years of age and realizing that the only "romantic" relationship you've ever had was in the 7th grade with a boy who ended up transferring schools half way through the year and never responded to any text after forces you to sit in front of a massive mirror for an intense session of self reflection.

There are times that we feel like we're being left behind, friends are either getting married, getting engaged, or having kids. That feeling that we're running out of time as we see everyone else moving on with their lives—but, here you are, feeling stuck in a job, and contemplating if you should eat that pizza at three in the morning. You say you're okay, but some nights are just crippling with sadness with the same old routine, and having no one to feel excited about life with.

I always thought that I’m fine with being alone, that I am happy. I always thought that I can survive all alone, but as I sit here thinking to myself, maybe I am not okay. Maybe I just somehow adapted and made peace with the idea that I’m not good enough for someone to love.

You know that nightmare where you host a party and no one turns up?

Often when I scroll down my friends’ Instagram feeds, I get this sudden gut-wrenching regret. But not because of them, but because of me.

The internet has completely changed the way we meet people. Even as recently as 15 years ago, single folks that had an online dating profile were embarrassed to even admit it. Today, everyone is meeting people online! The one big downside of online dating in the past was that in order to meet someone, you had to spend hours at home searching through your computer by yourself.