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Everyday Junglist
Bio
Practicing mage of the natural sciences (Ph.D. micro/mol bio), Thought middle manager, Everyday Junglist, Boulderer, Cat lover, No tie shoelace user, Humorist, Argan oil aficionado. Occasional LinkedIn & Facebook user
Stories (582/0)
The Whisphering Video
In a certain country there was once great lamentation over a deadly virus that caused great sickness, killed much of its people, and laid waste its economy. The President promised a large reward to anyone who would free the land from this plague; but the virus was able to mutate so quickly that no one could develop a medicine which could stop it. At last the President gave notice that whosoever should develop a medicine or vaccine that could kill or stop the virus should have his only daughter to wife.
By Everyday Junglist11 months ago in Fiction
Tales of the Goddess
"And what is your opinion, Goddess?" Baj immediately regretted those words coming out of his mouth for he knew the answer he would get even before it escaped the rouge red, pouty lips of the Goddess. It was one of her favorite pith philosophical observations on the nature of Gods and mortals, and no matter how often she said it (a lot) it also pleased her to no end and irked the ever living shit out of Baj. This is no doubt one of the reasons she took so much delight in saying it. "Gods and Goddesses do not have opinions mortal, for once we say something it is a fact." Baj groaned out loud and snorted drawing a look from the Goddess that could freeze the ocean and a sharp snap of pain across his mind as she punished him with a mental slap. It stung, much worse than an actual whip, which is what it was meant to emulate. This was how the Goddess maintained control of her servants. Of course, that same whip could be used to deliver great pleasure as well, great pleasure. As to what either did for the Goddess Baj could not say, but in this instance at least the ability to punish must have brought her some satisfaction for she smiled and laughed wickedly as he winced in pain, dropping to one knee from the force of it. "Do not forget your place mortal. Do not mock your Goddess. Ever." He glared up at her from his one knee and replied quietly "Of course Goddess, Please forgive me my insolence. Sometimes I forget just how holy and exalted you actually are." The Goddess smiled, pleased at his words of contrition even though they were said without a shred of earnesty. Even after untold milennia of living among mortals she still struggled mightily to grasp the concepts of sarcasm and irony. This fact gave Baj much pleasure and he constantly mocked the Goddess in ways she thought of as genuine admiration and praise. It was one of the very few ways he had of fighting back against the barrage of minor humilations she threw in his direction.
By Everyday Junglist11 months ago in Fiction
Tales of the Goddess
"The whore Aphrodite has vexed me again." Baj winced at the mention of the Goddess Aphrodite. As with Athena, Elyria held a strange fascination bordering on obsession with the Goddess of love, but, unlike with Athena, for Aphrodite, Elyria bore no admiration or grudging respect. Instead she expressed only contempt and a deep seated hatred and jealousy. Whenever her name was spoke aloud he knew he was in for a long winded tirade describing the many faults and shortcomings of Aphrodite and her hordes of "zombies" as Elyria referred to the unfortunate men, who, like himself had been pressed into service of a Goddess mostly against their will. Although his own forced servitude was painful and humiliating, when he thought of Aphrodite's zombies he was thankful for his own fate. Unlike Elyria, when Aphrodite enslaved a man she took not only his body and spirit, but also robbed him of his mind. They became like empty shells, not able to think for themselves, or act in any way without the express approval of Aphrodite herself. Only breathing without permission was allowed. The zombies could not eat, bathe, or even piss or shit without first asking Aphrodite. Many of her men died of starvation or disease, not for lack of food or clean clothes and shelter but because the Goddess simply forgot, or actively withheld, approving their ability to eat or to bath themselves. For a man like Baj, it would be a fate worse then death. After giving Elyria a moment to compose herself Baj dared ask somewhat impertinently "What has she done this time Goddess?" Elyria fumed at the question, her cheeks reddening a bit, biting down softly on her lower pouty lip before replying sharply "Several of her zombies have managed to infiltrate my great temple at Ephaistos and stolen one of my Elyrian spears." The spears were powerful weapons indeed. When thrown by the Goddess they could travel many miles at speeds approaching that of sound, and they always found their target. They were said to have been forged of purissimum argentum by the great dwarven silversmith Skardak Forgehelm and had been given to the Goddess as a gift by the dwarven demiGod AnKaris whose love for Elyria was legendary, at least in the mind of the Goddess. In reality, AnKaris was something of a player having impregnated at least three Goddesses including Elyria in the span of less than 100 years. A timeframe that for a mortal would equate to someething like a week. One of the other impregnated Goddesses happend to be Aphrodite, a fact that no doubt contributed at least in part to Elyria's seething jealousy and hatred for her. "The great temple at Ephaistos is one of your strongholds Goddess. How could they manage such a thing?" Baj asked with only the slightest hint of sarcasm, which, of course the Goddess either did not, or pretended not, to notice. The so called "great" temple at Ephaistos, was, like many of the Goddesses temples only great if you considered a run down rock strewn former castle guesthouse, overrun by weeds and dikon lizards great. On a good day it boasted a contingent of no more than 20 of Elyria's servants and supplicants. Those few that did "live" at the "great" temple were typically of less than sound mind and body and many stayed only because they were given three meals a day and a stack of hay upon which to sleep whenever they did. The fact that they were also forced to spend up to 8 hours a day attending courses and listening to lectures describing in excrutiating detail the philosophy of hope and love espoused by the Goddess caused most of the homeless to quickly decide a life on the streets was preferable. "According to reports they disguised themselves as supplicants desiring to learn of my philosophy of hope and love. They said they had heard of my many wise teachings and great beauty and were so enthralled they immediately began a pilgrimage to the nearest temple dedicated to me so they might pledge themselves as supplicants." "And your temple guards believed that obviously made up story?" Baj sneered, then immediately regreted his words when he saw the anger twinged with hurt on the Goddesses face. Then he felt the pain, the sting of the mental whip she stung him with. He dropped to a knee and gasped as he always did whenever she punished him in this way. The pain was significant and severe and in this particular case she had struck him hard, very hard. "Of course they believed it. Such a thing is a very common occurrence at my many temples human. Now get up and shut up. It is time for us to leave." the Goddess spat angrily "To where do we head Goddess?" Baj asked timidly, still regaining his senses and a bit off balance from the whipping he had just recieved. "To the great temple at Ephaistos of course. Where else?" As they set off to gather their belongings for the long trip west to Ephaistos Baj fumed in anger at the Goddess for the punishment. It was not deserved and unjust, arbitrary and capricious and he hated the Goddess for it each and every time she did it. And yet, it was not the anger in her eyes that he remembered when he replayed in his mind what had just transpired, but rather the hurt. Surprisingly he found himself regretting what he had said because of the pain he had caused. He was sorry for the small seed of self doubt he had sown in her mind with his comment. Quickly he reprimanded himself. She is an evil creature Baj, not to be trusted, only to be used as I need her, nothing more he thought, and he almost believed it too.
By Everyday Junglist11 months ago in Fiction
It is With Much Regret That I Must Inform You I Cannot Accept the Position of Your Boyfriend
Author's note: This piece was originally published on another website, from which I have since been permanently banned, as a satirical response to a (semi) humorous piece by the writer Lizzie Logan on that same site. The link to the original post is here and I highly encourage you to read that first as it helps to frame my response in the appropriate light. I happened to stumble across it in my archives, and despite being five years old now I think it still holds up fairly well though, ultimately, I guess that is for you, the reader, to decide. In any event. Enjoy!
By Everyday Junglist11 months ago in Filthy
Becoming Jesus
Jesus of Narareth does not exist. He is not/was not a real person, neither son of God, nor son of Mary and Joseph. That is the conclusion the man had reached after spending approximately one year scouring all of the lands mentioned in the Bible and much further in search of the holy man revered, and worshiped by billions across his planet earth and well beyond. In his time, the distant future, the Christian faith, along with many other human religious traditions, had spread out far into the Milky Way galaxy. As humans had mastered the ability to travel great distances through space and encountered intelligent alien species, they had brought their religious beliefs with them. Some of the earliest and most important explorers of the galaxy, were in fact religious proselytizers or missionaries. They were hoping to convert to their faith any intelligent beings they might encounter, exactly as the early sea faring explorers of earth had done some 3500 years prior, discovering and eventually settling new lands. In the process, through war and disease, they had killed millions of indigenous peoples, but their efforts gave way to the rise of human civilization and the spread of Christianity to all corners of the world.
By Everyday Junglist11 months ago in Fiction
Choice and Emotion
I think it is fair to say that most people believe they have only some to very little control over their emotional states. Things happen in our lives, most of which are out of our direct control, and those things cause us to feel certain emotions. A friend dies and we feel sad, we win a contest and we feel happy, we are stuck in an all day meeting and we feel bored, etc. I also think it is fair to say that most people believe we do have some control over our emotions, or at least the depth of them, or at the very least, how much we let them effect us in our daily lives. The question of how much or how little control we have over our emotional states is difficult and probably unanswerable and likely varies greatly between individuals, societies, cultures, sexes, and many other factors. And, while it is an excellent question, it is not the question I intend to explore in this piece. Instead I will assume that we do have some control over our emotional states and ask a slightly different question. Essentially I want to know if we have more or less control over emotional states we view primarily as "bad" or "negative" compared to those we view as "good" or "positive?"
By Everyday Junglist11 months ago in Psyche
Are Microorganism's Responsible for Alzheimer's Disease?
Author's preface: As this is a review of a review article I do lean heavily on the original source material for much of the content. The original article is linked below. Be aware that if I do use words or phrasing from the original without attribution, that such attribution is implied. Feel free, and I highly encourage you, to read the original article and compare and contrast with my own summary of it.
By Everyday Junglist11 months ago in Humans
Warning Reimagined For the Modern Age. Content Warning.
Author's preface: With sincere apologies to Jenny Joseph and her classic poem Warning I present to you Warning Reimagined for the Modern Age. Warning, written by Miss Joseph in 1961 was voted Britain’s favourite poem. It is known and loved the world over for its message of old age as a time for indulgence and fun. Warning reimagined was written in 2023 and has not yet recieved any votes in any contest of favorite poems in Britain or anywhere else in the world. In Warning the poem’s respectable middle-aged woman, imagines herself in old age as a cheeky rebel with outrageous clothes and dotty behaviour. In Warning Reimagined the poems disreputable middle aged lowlife imagines herself in old age as a violent, depraved, borderline psychopath. Jenny Joseph created a character whose thoughts have been quoted at conferences and funerals, used to cheer up sick friends and remembered with pleasure by children and adults alike around the world. In Warning Reimagined Daniel DeMarco has created a character whose thoughts should be censored and banned, used to depress and enrage enemies, and instantly forgotten with pleasure by almost all rational right thinking persons around the world.
By Everyday Junglist12 months ago in Humor
It is Quality and Quantity Which Matter
Many credit the ancient Roman stoic Seneca the Younger as the first to say “it is quality rather than quantity which matters.” While it is highly doubtful he was the first to make such a statement, he was the first to say it whose words were written down and preserved. Seneca might be dismayed to learn that his “wise” sayings have been so overused that today many are cliches. They include such classics as; money doesn’t buy happiness (Suppose all the belongings of many rich men were piled upon you….What will you learn from these things? Only how to desire more), live in the now (True happiness is… to enjoy the present, without anxious dependence upon the future), use it or lose it (Difficulties strengthen the mind, as labor does the body), you make your own luck (Luck is what happens when preparation meets opportunity), and, things are much better than they seem (we suffer more from imagination than from reality), to name just a few choice examples.
By Everyday Junglist12 months ago in Education
Belts With Holes Are Dead
In one possible dystopian future the fall of man was brought about not by a nuclear holocaust or alien invasion, nor by a biological agent unleashing a zombie plague or a global economic collapse, but rather by an event so mundane, so random, so seemingly inconsequential that not even the wisest of men could have predicted it. This is the world of belts with holes are dead. A world ended when the last belt with holes suddenly disappeared from our planet earth. A hellish nightmarescape where the ability to keep one’s pants up even if they are too large is no longer an option for most. The rich seclude themselves in future belt enclaves where they live in relative luxury and wear whatever size pants within +/- two sizes they desire while the poor live in squalor, suffering from constant pants droppage or doing anything they can to just get by. The lowest of these, the so called “below the knee cutters” are the worst off by far. Their misery was so great that they actually took scissors to every pair of pants they owned and cut them off below the knees. Sick I know, do not read on if you are faint of heart. The only hope left are the so called Pioneers of Future Belts. Will they arrive in time to save our once beautiful planet and usher in a utopian paradise where everyone, regardless of means, can choose to wear whatever pants they want, no matter the waist size or inseam length? These stories represent the collected works of just some of the people who lived through those dark times. Pray their future does not become our own.
By Everyday Junglist12 months ago in Humor
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