A Few Of My Favorite Stories

“The Eagle Story”

I tell this story when working with people who have trauma, grief, and loss work to do. The many people who are giving up drugs, alcohol, sugar, overworking, gambling, etc. Those traumas have been self-medicated by using one of the above and others.

Here is the story: The eagle will fly right through the middle of the storm to get to the other side. While other birds will work to avoid the storm by going around and in doing so, they get beat up and sometimes killed. The birds sometimes never make it around the storm.

So, I want to be like the eagle and fly through. I had the sugar early in life, the drugs next in the form of diet pills, then alcohol and cigarettes, and continued amphetamines. I quit some of that at age 24, and the rest at 26.

I have been off sugar and flour 4 times in my life now and I’m going for a 5th time. I put it off not wanting to go through the withdrawals. Not wanting to get the full feelings that come along with no sugar/flour. I can be in denial, even though I can’t stay there.

My denial says, I am old and I don’t have the vanity thing anymore. I don’t have to be thin. I am down 50 pounds from my top weight and maintaining here. Okay, so intermittent fasting isn’t working for me. I can try something else. But do I have to give up sugar and flour?

Then there is, I need support to go off sugar and flour. None of my friends are off. There are no support groups close by. I need face-to-face groups, not online help. All denial.

How bad do I want this?

I am a type 2 diabetic and have been since 2001. I had a cancer that was called treatable, probably not curable, I have atrial fibrillation due to my taking myself off of oxycontin after broken arm surgery from a fall.

“The John Skunk Story”

My mother would talk about this boy in her village called John Skunk. She said that John Skunk would fight his sisters. So, in her family when the boys would fight the girls they would be called John Skunk. There were six boys and four girls in my mom’s family growing up.

In my family, there were four boys and two girls. The same thing would happen. The boys would be called John Skunk if they fought me or my sister. Then the same thing happened with my children, a boy and a girl. It didn’t matter that the boys were younger than the girls. Same thing!

What the guys learned was that you don’t hit your sisters, then you don’t hit girls and finally you don’t hit women! And females learned brothers don’t hit sisters, or girls, and don’t hit women or they were John Skunk!

What did I learn? I learned that if a boy/man would hit me or another girl then they were a John Skunk. Very little to no domestic violence in the family that grew up hearing this story! I think where there was, they missed it somehow.

The first time a man threatened to hit me, I said, “If you hit me, you will never see me again!” And I meant it! It came from childhood. This strong belief!

“The Vulture Story”

I used this story for myself and others with poor self-esteem and too much negative self-talk. Sid Simon tells this story or maybe this is something similar to his story as it has been too many years ago now since I read it.

The vulture is flying high above us when we are born and stays there until we begin to get some negative messages. First of all, those messages come from people in our life. They are more common at certain ages. And all of those negative messages are vulture food.

Eventually, we have our own negative messages we tell ourselves. You can still have others reinforcing those negative messages for us. All of those negative messages are vulture food.

That vulture that was so far away from you that it was not in your way at all, now it is bopping you on the top of the head with all those negative messages. i.e. You are stupid, you are fat, you are ugly, etc.

All vulture food, all feeding the vulture and bopping you on the head.

“Stop” is important to say as you begin to call yourself down. Just say “Stop” whenever you notice. Then reach up and say, “Pluck you vulture!”

“Books for all ages”

These books I found most helpful working with others. Especially when first in withdrawal. They don’t wish to read any full book.

So read this and relate to the story. i.e. Shel Silverman, The Missing Piece, The Missing Piece Meets the Big O. Many related to these stories and more. They would relate what was going on in their life to the book for all ages. There are very few words and a lot of pictures that tell a story.

You would think everyone would have the same or similar stories but that wasn’t true. How everyone relates is different.

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First published by Mindful Mental Health in medium.com

I wrote for National Tell a Story Day because of Paula Shablo’s story on Medium.com

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