Dispel judgement, debunk the myths and correct the misconceptions you hold about eating disorders.
The snow falls heavily outside when I wake. I hadn’t realised it had gotten so cold outside. I’ve been living each day the same as the one before, struggling to get out of bed and not wanting to eat. The voice tells me not to.
“Whose pants are those?” “Mine.”I looked down as I said it, the word muffled in the bend of my throat. I pulled up the jeans I had slept in by my belt loops. Beth did not look convinced. She scowled.
The first time I noticed I was chubby was when I was six years old, and the back of my hands were rounded from fat, but my friend's hands looked more like flat spheres. I weighed sixty pounds.
Overcoming an Eating Disorder
There are certain aspects of my life I am readily willing and even happy to share; if I ever do anything embarrassing you know I will be on Twitter right afterward so the world can hear about every time I trip in public or call a professor “Dad”.
Working at an Eating Disorder Facility (the horrible practices they don't want you to know)
When I first graduated college with a bachelor's degree in Psychology, my dream was to work in a mental health facility in order to help people manage their diagnoses. That dream came true. In the Fall of 2020, I worked at an eating disorder location in Northern Virginia and let me tell you, working at a residential facility was not the walk in the park that I had imagined. When I first showed up to this facility, I had hoped that I would be able to start helping the clients immediately. Instead, I was faced with multiple challenges.
Sweet Whisper of Cheese Sticks
With the monotony of my at-home 9-5 ringing in my ears and my glazed eyes staring into blue light, I glance at my wrist after feeling the vibration of my Fitbit. Just reminding me to take at least one step this hour. '250 out of 250 steps to go!' it encouraged. And then I heard the sweet whisper of cheese sticks coming from the fridge.
The Confessions of A Secret Eater
A tree remains beautiful, even when it’s time for them to shed their leaves. We remain beautiful, even when our body sheds or gains or droops or tightens. We are beauty, we are trees.
A New Start: 2021
Everybody always talks about the new year like it's a magic portal where everything changes, and then they get disappointed when everything is the same as last year. It's the same thing every year, but "new year, new me" takes effort and most people don't do anything to make it come true, this year I'm doing it, let me explain to you how I'm truly getting my fresh start for 2021.
How It Started
This story talks about anorexia, if you are not comfortable with the subject please read with caution or exit this story.
Inside the Mind
I have been diagnosed with anorexia for six months, after struggling with my eating for five years and it is the hardest thing that I have to go through in my life. I never thought it would get this bad, but it has and it has been extremely hard to through recovery. Everyone in my life acts like it is something that will go away overnight but it is really not that easy, especially with all of the things that cross my mind everyday. Everything written below is how I feel everyday, just to show you what its is like. For some context, I am five foot tall and i have extreme emetophobia which is the fear of vomiting.
Correlation of Obesity and Mental Health Issues
There is a big dilemma in what causes what, i.e., does being obese causes mental health issues, or does psychiatric disorder push a person more towards being obese? Not every obese person has the same thing, but it has been in studies conducted at the Texas Health Science Center and NOO that obese people are at higher risk for depression and anxiety.
How My Eating Disorder Saved Me
Eating disorders are strange beasts. They come in all shapes and sizes. Mine came in the form of a huge black mass. Something indescribably dark and consuming. It sat on my chest and weighed me down. It drowned me like an anchor chained to my ankles, pulling me deeper and deeper into an ocean of pain. It bore into my soul until there was only a shadow of me left. It could have killed me.