satire
Humor and satire to make you laugh. Everyone loves a good innuendo.
All men beware!!! 8 items you should never masturbate with.
A steaming apple pie definitely belongs to the soft category of misappropriated things that can be used for masturbation. It is said that guys who like to experiment try vibrating console controllers, kitchen utensils and garden tools. I’ve tracked down the worst penis traps for you and tracked down men who have made painful acquaintances with them. Not suitable for imitation!
“La Chatte à moitié moite”
The story of the half-wet pussy transpired on a cruise ship sailing around Tahiti and the Marquesas Islands before the pandemic. It was a good time, indeed, notwithstanding the pussy already a marvel by itself and wet, albeit only half all around the circumference and, of course, inside where it is always warm and nice. Very nice, methinks, now that I visualize the scene. I will never forget it, and soon, you will not either when you read all about it in the upcoming paragraphs full of the right words. No! The true words of the half-wet pussy. It all occurred in French. It is true that it sounded better in some parts. But when I sensed that English was going down, I recited some shameless Shakespeare, and Molière was put to bed, both literally and figuratively, which seemed to be the same, at least at the time.
Patrick M. OhanaPublished 3 years ago in FilthyThey All Laughed
Some legend has it that one day — it was actually the middle of the night — most body organs were having a discussion as to which one of them was the most important part. Important how, some of us could ask? To life! But they are all important that way. Very true! But could any one organ, one singular part, or a part of a part, be crowned the king, or queen, of all parts? The optimum organ! The Don of organs!
Patrick M. OhanaPublished 3 years ago in FilthyThe Last Shitstorm of Winter
There are plenty of types of suffering. We, as humans, engineer new ones every single day. But there is a unique despair to being trapped in a place with only one commode concurrent with companions being afflicted with bowel distress.
Alejandro escobedoPublished 3 years ago in FilthyThe Rabbit
Minkus really had me thinking after our conversation last night. How is it possible that I’m 23 years old and haven’t experienced the power of an orgasm? A glorious, make your legs tremble, bring tears to your eyes, projectile squirting, type orgasm like the ones my co-worker described as she confided and overshared to me last week about her office romance with our manager? I’m pressed. I guess if I really want this experience, I need to let go and explore my body, my damn self.
Elle DriverPublished 3 years ago in FilthySteve Jobs Was A Pimp, Without Ever Knowing It
I feel the tingling sensation, see the faint glow and immediately flip my wrist over. It’s Stormie, my watch. Yes. I named my watch, and while I know it may sound weird, it’s because she became more than just a way to tell time and check the date.
Rick MartinezPublished 3 years ago in FilthyThe Signs As Sex Positions
ARIES (MARCH 21ST - APRIL 19TH) Aries reminds me of air. Which reminds me of queefing. Which reminds me of the doggy style position. And there we have it folks, you lot get the doggy style position. This is also because I have looked at the way your stars are aligned and little dipper was getting dicked down doggy style by big dipper. Face down, ass up and well done. That’s how you like your meat. Also don’t forget to use a condom, Aries has a high rate of STI’s. I can’t release where I got this information from but it’s true.
- Top Story - February 2021
Bold And Beautiful
There he is again. He's always in the library when I am. He is incredibly handsome. His eyes flow, like the earths view from outer space. His hair is brown with a copper glow. His body, WOW! The shoulders of a bull, and arms of a lion. However, he is average height for a man. No matter, he is everything I've been looking for in a match.
Amber FiercePublished 3 years ago in Filthy The Touch Of A Chicago Lawyer
Piece of the song Thunder Struck begins to play. My phone is ringing, waking up from my slumber on the couch, I can not believe I had fallen asleep.
Audie EdwardsPublished 3 years ago in FilthyA Vegas Moment
Not Everything That Happens in Vegas Has to Stay in Vegas Two summers ago, my friends and I all had been planning this big trip to Las Vegas Nevada for our twenty first birthdays and our friend Trai was the last one to turn Twenty-one in August. We had one of our friend’s cousin who was a high roller out there plan the entire trip for us and it could not have worked out better he made sure this trip was going to create memories we would not ever forget. And he was right we created memories that will last a lifetime and it was sincerely the best time any of us have ever had doing anything ever.
Ethan HollowayPublished 3 years ago in FilthyJuliet the Villain- Part 1
SETTING: A FAR AWAY SHOT OF TWO PALATIAL, WELL KEPT HOMES, DIRECTLY ACROSS THE STREET FROM ONE ANOTHER. AS THE NARRATOR'S VOICE BEGINS, WE BEGIN TO CLOSE IN ON BOTH HOMES
Katie Artis WisePublished 3 years ago in FilthyThe Talon
A good bourgeois of Picardy, who was perhaps a descendant of one of those illustrious troubadours on the banks of the Oise or the Somme, and whose anonymous life, after a decade or more, now stands revealed by a great writer of the last century; a brave and honest bourgeois, I say, lived in the city of Saint-Quentin, so famous by the great men she gave to literature.