Katie Artis Wise
Bio
Flawed. Silly. Funny. Cute. Hopeful. Virgo. Weird. Green Enthusiast. Sarcastic AF. Obsessed with Bravo, The Golden Girls, the beach, The Rolling Stones, cute kitties and pups, history, reading, art... I think that sums it up nicely. đź’‹đź’‹đź’‹
Stories (13/0)
From One Life to Another
Back in the late 90s, Upper Darby, PA was a pretty solid place to grow up, in my opinion. One town away from Tina Fey but not too far away from Philadelphia, I had lived here all my life, with relatives and friends in walking distance. I was comfortable here- life in Delaware County (or Delco, as the locals prefer to call it) was all I’d ever known. It was a warm afternoon in May, summer was on the horizon, and I just couldn’t wait- I just felt like good things were going to happen and I wanted to be ready! I had just auditioned for our fall production of “Meet Me in St Louis” and really thought I had a shot at one of the leads. After school that day, I practically levitated home and headed for the phone to call my mom at work and tell her about my fabulous audition.
By Katie Artis Wise3 years ago in Humans
How to Beat a Drug Test
There are few words in life scarier to someone who smokes weed than “drug test”- especially back in the Dark Ages of Cannabis, when legalization was nothing more than a mere pipe dream. Back in 2012, I was working as a temp in a hospital. The administration liked my work and wanted to make me full time, for which I was grateful. I had a hard time finding work right out of college and really needed this job. I was all in until they told me the next day I’d be subjected to a drug test.
By Katie Artis Wise3 years ago in Potent
Tortitude: It’s A Thing
Much like the rest of the world, in the spring of 2020, my husband (Matt) and I had all the time in the world, nowhere to go and not much to do except hunker down and do our best to just get through it. Despite all the horrible things happening in the world, we really enjoyed watching movies together, having game nights and going for long walks. Of course, there was doom scrolling. Lots and lots of doom scrolling…
By Katie Artis Wise3 years ago in Petlife
Sammy: Protector of Mice
I grew up hating cats. Despising them, in fact. What was there to like? They were rude, not affectionate and completely aloof animals. And what was the deal with their rough little sandpaper tongues? They were just gross, in my opinion.
By Katie Artis Wise3 years ago in Petlife
Speed Date Disaster
I stood for a minute, hesitating against the hostess stand as a few dozen people milled around the bar, looking as clueless and anxious as I felt. The pungent aroma of fried food invaded my nostrils as I hesitated at the door of the restaurant. I put on makeup and heels for this?
By Katie Artis Wise3 years ago in Humans
The Unlikeliest Virgo That Ever Virgo'd
Analytical. Perfectionist. Reliable. Hard Worker. Virginal. These are some of the traits that people associate with Virgos. We’re not prideful like Leos and don’t feel the need to constantly be first like Aries. We’re the worker bees of the Zodiac- smack dab in the middle of the twelve signs at number 6, we need everything to be just so. We hate anything disorganized or messy and don’t feel at peace when our daily routine is interrupted. Are we self-critical? We don’t think so, but we’re smart enough to realize it probably comes off that way. Are we picky? You betcha. Do we have excellent memory for detail? OF COURSE!
By Katie Artis Wise3 years ago in Humans
10 Commandments of Wedding Planning
Planning your wedding pre-covid was quite an ordeal, right? It was all about the perfect everything- the dress, the ambiance, the menu, the cake and the guest list! In Covid times, wedding planning is all about safety, restrictions and even more worrying about every little detail. I wrote this several years ago and just wanted to share... and hopefully provide a little bit of optimism and nostalgia for when we can (hopefully) plan weddings the way we did before Covid knocked the world out of whack.
By Katie Artis Wise3 years ago in Marriage
Love Yourself This Valentine's Day with Kick Ass Music
I’ve never been the girl who cared about Valentine’s Day. Sure, it’s great being in a relationship and celebrating it… but why that one designated day? Is love somehow irrelevant or less important if you’re not celebrating it in the middle of February? I’ve always said to various boyfriends (and even my husband) “If you want to really show me you love me, do something for me on a random day in August. I guarantee you I’ll appreciate it a lot more than if you go out of your way on this one designated day.”
By Katie Artis Wise3 years ago in Beat
No Better Feeling than Clean
I anxiously pace back and forth in front of the window, waiting and occasionally peeking out at the darkening night sky and thick rain that offer little clarity as to whom, or what, may be out there. I’ve been stuck in this pandemic lockdown for almost a month now, and things are getting weird. I live alone. I have no local family, no job, no pets, no kids and at the moment, no supplies. It’s like the whole damn world is closed. I never thought I’d experience anything like this in my lifetime, and I’d never felt more anxious or unsettled.
By Katie Artis Wise3 years ago in Humans