What are you leaving behind in 2019?
What is it about this time of year specifically that single people just feel worse about themselves? What is it about the holiday season that makes people feel like they have to justify not being in a couple? Why isn’t it just sufficient to be alone during this season? It’s really difficult to understand the thought process of single people during this time. The most important thing to understand is how being single during the holidays can shake someone’s self-esteem and how we can change our mindset to enjoy the present moment.
I tend to be an over-planner. I used to make multiple plans for one weekend just to ensure that I never had downtime or stayed in on Saturday night. I would often tell myself that “I am a loser” if I spend a Saturday night watching Netflix alone. I’d rather have anyone to spend time with someone, versus time alone. This was really intimidating and would cause a lot of anxiety.
Everyone says it, “Oh, I’ll have a “treat yo’self day” or “I’m going to practice self-care and buy myself this…” That is always our justification to spend large amounts of money at Target or Lush. I literally walked out of Lush with three bath bombs and minus 50 dollars in my bank account... smh. These stores are literally making millions for overcharging “self-love items,” while the rest of us go broke!
When I look back on friendships and relationships that are not in my life anymore, I start to notice the signs and reasons why we had to go our separate ways. Throughout my life, I have had friends come and go and really question my self-worth. When numerous people who meant so much, leave, it does make you question their intentions in the relationship. The biggest thing I learnt within these friendships is when someone leaves you it does not reflect poorly on you, but that is what they had to do in the moment to survive. Another big thing I learned is that I have a hard time letting go of friendships that are not servicing me anymore. In particular, I’ve had a really good friend, completely ghost me and I’ve also had friends that I’ve had to distance myself from.
I don’t think there’s one genre of music that I don’t enjoy. When I look back on my life, I truly have been in every genre. I grew up on rock. I’ve always been really appreciative towards my mom who introduced me to legendary rockers, and when I hear their music now, I instantly go back to me as a little girl. Then in middle school and high school, I started loving musical theatre songs, but still listening to alternative and pop music. In college I listened to country and hip-hop. After college and now, I tend to gravitate towards female rappers and jazz music. It’s just so interesting to see my evolution within genres. There’s genres I prefer over others. But I appreciate all musicians putting their form of art out there. I love music. I grew up around it all my life and love discovering new music and re-discovering my old music.