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Fear of Losing

Fear

By Dr. Tulika SarkarPublished about a year ago 4 min read
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Fear of Losing
Photo by Jake Lucifer on Unsplash

It's terrible to lose. Losing a cherished toy when you're young is absolutely upsetting. Losing a close friend might alter the path of your life as a teenager. Losing a trusted partner is painful when you're young. Losses during infancy, youth, and adulthood can cause anxiety to become stronger with age and eventually turn into pure horror of losing someone you care about. Although this fear is unhealthy, it frequently results in actions such as violence, control, and manipulation that are not appropriate in a loving, caring relationship. How then do you get over your fear of losing a loved one?

Why does this fear of losing occurs?

Usually beginning in childhood, the fear of losing someone you love or the love of your life. Although it may not seem that romance and romantic relationships are related to childhood loss and trauma, your early relationships lay the groundwork for all of your subsequent relationships, and you frequently carry into adulthood wounds from those early friendships and relationships with your parents. The most frequent causes of these phobias are abuse or neglect by parents. Parents frequently ignore without even being aware of it. The fact that their children are fed, receive a top-notch education, and have everything they desire may lead well-intentioned parents to believe they are doing a fantastic job raising their family. The issue is that the love and comfort of having a parent nearby cannot be replaced by material conveniences. Even very particular parents can seriously harm their children's psychological wellbeing by not being present enough, being away when they are sitting together, using a phone or computer, or having emotional connection problems.

Additionally, suffering a loss can make you fear suffering another. If a loved one passes away, or if someone you love and trust abandons or betrays you, you might continue to live in constant worry that it will happen again. The majority of the time, these emotions serve as stifling factors in your regular life and only become apparent when new connections start. These emotions may show themselves as clinging or dominating behaviour, unreasonable demands made of your partner, or a desire for frequent contact.

Warning signs of damage :

The worry of losing a loved one is a fairly frequent one, and it is not always a sign of something more serious. When fear becomes crippling, overwhelming, or otherwise bothersome, that's when you might need assistance. Signs of fear that have gone too far?

Your fear has gotten out of control if you start pushing your loved ones away or giving up on relationships altogether because you're afraid of the worse. You may have an unwarranted dread of losing a loved one if you currently find it difficult to communicate with them because you worry about the day they pass away or how terrible it will be. You can also have an unjustified fear of loss if you find yourself avoiding love, intimacy, and vulnerability. Avoidance is rarely a healthy habit, and it deprives oneself of an essential human experience when one avoids the connection and sense of community that friendship, love, and passion bring. Even though it might not seem like a big deal to miss this experience, never having profound love can have numerous harmful effects, especially on one's physical health. People who live alone or with a long-term partner typically have better health on a regular basis.

Fear of loss or fear of abandonment :

The two are interchangeable. The dread of abandonment and the fear of losing a loved one are the same. There are several ways to lose someone you care about. In addition to new employment, unforeseen life changes, or losses in other areas, death can take your loved ones. Damage, sadly, is an inevitable aspect of life and cannot be prevented. Even while it makes rational to adopt a "I'll leave you before you leave me" mentality, you're hurting in both scenarios. You will experience the anguish of loss rather than ceasing to love or feel the suffering of your loved one. When you lose something, you have memories to keep love and hope alive; when you avoid something, you have nothing to cheer you up.

Treatment options

Fear of abandonment is a thought pattern that can be worked on and treated through therapy. The majority of abandonment issues are accompanied by unresolved trauma, thus trauma therapy as well as talk therapy can be beneficial in resolving this particular issue. When parents are uncaring, emotionally distant, or literally abandon their children, many people experience abandonment issues throughout their childhood. As a result, children learn that they cannot rely on the people they care about the most.

adviceanxietycopinghow topanic attacksrecoveryselfcaresupporttherapy
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About the Creator

Dr. Tulika Sarkar

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