The Road to Conscious Love

It wasn't what I wanted, but it was what was best to salvage whatever we had left in our connection. We were trying to build on quicksand every time we came into each other's lives, and he asked to go back to being family friends because we just couldn't give each other what we needed or wanted at the time. He wanted surface leveled-no strings attachment, and I couldn't give him that. I needed a soul-depth kind of love, and he wouldn't give me that. So we had to go our own ways, again.

I saw my person at our friend's wedding, where I choreographed their bride and groom dance, and he designed their wedding rings. We had a blast just dancing and hanging out as friends, but there's definitely a silent story playing in the background when we're together. It feels like we're living in a whole other dimension where we're so in love; but in this reality, on this surface, we're just strictly family friends.

On one hand, this is completely devastating to grasp and accept. All that my heart, body, and mind yearns for is this love. It has totally taken up full-time residency rent free in my psyche. I only think of him on two occasions: day and night.

On the other hand, however, it is extremely empowering to recognize the illusion of the first hand. All of that yearning is only the mind disconnecting from Soul. The truth is, we are never apart from each other, regardless of the label or the physical state we're in. Being "friend zoned" only hurts when the ego is involved, but in actuality, it's moving us into exactly the stabilizing union that this kind of love deserves.

This is what it means to be Twin Flames. You share the same soul vibration and Chakra energy system. Think of twins born of the same womb. They are two different bodies but were created from the same egg and developed in the same placenta. This is the identical concept of Twin Flames; they are your very essence in the counterpart of another body. If you identify as a Divine Feminine, for instance, that means your Twin Flame is the essence of your masculine energy in human form (and visa versa).

Until we grasp this concept, our mind will conjure up fear and doubt around the connection and make assumptions based on external factors. Are you physically together, and if so, what is the label of your connection? How often do you see each other or talk? Did they say they love you? Do other people think you're cute together?

Our mind will come up with all of these scenarios to evaluate the connection to make sense of it, but the Twin Flame Journey is not of the mind, but of the soul. It is divinely designed to bring you back into Soul. That's why "The Road to Conscious Love" involves the Twin Flame Journey so heavily.

The beauty of it all is that you will only be in separation as long as you believe that you are separate from your divine counterpart. What you'll find in this book about the Twin Flame Journey is that there are periods of what is known as "separation" when you and your person pull back for a temporary moment in time in order to grow, heal and balance. This will always happen as long as there is growth, healing or balance needed within the connection. If there is growth, healing or balance needed within the connection, that means it's needed within you because you, your person, and the connection are one soul frequency.

In the meantime, I've just been really focusing on my career and my son. I'm also getting back into music and started a tea + tarot channel, which has been so much fun. I even enrolled in an astrology school! This is truly a journey of self-love and discovery. I'm learning about myself in ways I never knew possible. Aligning with Soul is what brings us back home to love.

I know it has to be this way right now, as I am building my empire, and so is he. I'm holding tightly onto faith that Divine will never steer my heart in the wrong direction. As long as I listen and follow its guidance, I will be led to my greatest joy, and I trust that it will end with us living authentically in our truth as individuals together.

In the next chapters to come, I will uncover how this journey can shift from separation to soul, and how you cannot be separate from that which you are.