The air is my lover, fore when I reach out, it is only her face I caress. When I walk outside, she greets me with a gentle kiss across my lips, though it is only felt because she rushes by so fast in what the world calls the “the wind.” As I stand naked in my room, only her eyes gaze upon my body with a willingness to touch all over. Any whispers sprung from my lips when an urge and longing to say “I Love You” to a woman, only fall to the ears of the air that fills the room. She's loyal, my lover; the wind... but her touch is always cold and leaves me wanting for more. When I touch her, grateful as I am that she is there, still I feel nothing but emptiness.
Some of you may be thinking as you glanced at the title of my story;
Lately I've been wondering what happened in my past lives. How did I get stuck being okay with what I am? I am trying so hard to look within, and find the one I'm supposed to be. I know I am not there yet, I still have much work to do. How did I end up alone?
“Why am I all by myself at 9:30pm on a Saturday night in New York City?!” I thought to myself, as I wandered slowly down the sidewalk. The movie was great, (more than great, romantic-comedies are my FAVORITE and this one was particularly romantic AND comedic) but too short, and if I went back to my apartment now, my middle-aged roommates would think I had no social life. How is it that Jo, the 65-year-old musical theatre actress, had more of a social life than me? I’m 27. I’m in the prime of life. I live in New York City! Most nights, I’m in bed watching Netflix by 10:30pm. Being that it was Saturday, I had decided to go out to the movies. (I know, I know, WILD night). Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE seeing movies by myself. But after awhile, you start to wonder if you’re weird. Being alone so much. Not having more friends. More plans. Maybe I just push people away? Maybe I’ve turned down too many social opportunities in the past and people have given up inviting me. Maybe I’m afraid of people getting too close.
You don't need a partner to be happy. One of my pet peeves is hearing people say things such as "Single people know deep down they're not happy because they're not in a relationship". This is wrong on so many levels, and an unhealthy attitude for one. Being single doesn't mean sad Valentine's Days and lonely nights. It's not like being in a relationship is always the end goal, and time spent as single is just time inbetween happiness or time spent waiting for your next partner to enter your life. Your time is too precious to be spent waiting for someone to come and make you happy.
They walked hand-in-hand like teenagers huddled comfortably under his £10 umbrella with a shaky handle that he’s had since graduating from university all those years ago. The rain was coming down in torrents, the sound of drops on the pavement drowning out whatever whisper of a conversation they were still having at this point in the evening. Fortunately, it was also rendering his heavy breathing inaudible, masking his nervousness from her, at least for now. But she knew, as they always do. The pounding in his chest echoed through his thick woolen jumper and drenched parka to where her hand was tightly grasping his arm. She could feel his anxiety, his boyish enthusiasm for their time together, and all she could do is hold on tighter, nestling her face in the reassuring cold of his shoulder.
Self-dating is set to be the hot new trend in self-love, self-development, and empowerment. Learning to treat yourself with the same love and care as your partner is just one of the many reasons why singles should consider self-dating.
Raise your hand if you keep getting stuck in relationships with the same type of man? By type, I don't necessarily mean they all have brown hair. I mean the same level of man. They may look different, have different types of jobs or family dynamics. The traits that clusters these men together under the same umbrella are ones such as their emotional maturity and the number of red flags you over look time and time again. If your anything like me, I get stuck with the same level of man every FREAKIN’ time!
I still find myself turning my head at all the same type of guy that turned my head when I was 16. Why?! They look exciting? I know exactly where exciting leads, straight to hell! Climbing out of hell is really hard! I am NOT trying to go back!
You expect it. It’s inevitable; you know it’s coming, yet when it does the news still manages to drive a stake through your heart. He moved on, you got left behind. Again.
I get it, I really do. I get it because I've been there too. Far too many times to count. Call me crazy, call me foolish, but I still believe it's just a matter of the right person. Cause see, the right person won't hurt you that way. They won't make you wonder why you're not enough. They won't make you feel alone. They won't make you feel unworthy. Oh but the wrong person....