The Will

With his hand engulfed in his fathers he walked under the bridge of her colossal pearly-white teeth with his neck craned all the way back. His deep brown eyes seemed to scan every nook and cranny of her oversized head. Trumpets and horns honked harmonious melodies that flooded the atmosphere. A group of human-sized monkeys let out cackles of laughter as they manifested polyrhythmic beats on marching drums that sparked a pep in his step.

I'm 21 bear of a guy. Teddy bear or the bear is what most my friends call me an awkward cinnamon roll nerdy and open book. I'm told I'm an easy guy to get along but weird, my likes are anime, manga, webtoons, role play games, role playing and fighting games. I'm a writer working on getting my BA either in English or communications and work as an editor or eventual novelist. I'm recently Separated but working on getting divorced so just being honest there and always looking for fellow nerds to befriend. I'm a dork who loves to role play, write poetry and occasionally rant, life is hard but we'll get through it you know. I love topics in the fantasy variety, we'll discuss nerd theory along with philosophy or moral concepts and such. I'll occasionally rant about top ten best manga or webtoons, or start up a series about my wacky roomies. You can call me Blaze and hope we get along.

Hello dear Vocal's readers. My name is Kyan, and this page is all about who I am and why I want to share my stories here.

Sometimes you don’t realize what love will make a person do, especially for a mother. In a small town, located in the Eastern Province of Afghanistan, there lived a woman with her son. For the purpose of this story, I will refer to the mother as “Mina” and the son as “Hamid”. Mina and Hamid lived in a small house, with very few provisions. Her husband had passed away when Hamid was an infant. They had no other family, only each other. Mina took any job offers and would usually work two or three jobs at the same time. She loved her son very much and exhausted herself to give Hamid anything she possibly could. Hamid had just started school and Mina took on more jobs to pay for the extra expenses. She wanted him to have the same opportunities as the other children had. One day she received word that her son was in the hospital. She raced to the hospital with all the fears that a mother has upon learning that her child has been hurt. When she arrived the doctor informed her Hamid had been involved in an accident at school. His injury was not life-threatening and he would be released from the hospital within a few days. She stayed at the hospital with him and never left his side. Her only concern was her son and his future.

The year was 1977 and in the chilly AZ month of December. I was born. lol. But, I wasn't just born I was born to two Aries. First let me say that astrology or horoscope was a forbidden idea in my home growing up but, I seemed to have learned about it eventually in my early adult years. Even though I'm not hard core into it I can definitely see alot of characteristics in individuals with basic understanding of a certain sign. Back in 1998 I read a book that talked about each sign and each sign as a child. Well it never dawned on me this would be a good idea to understand your child from a young age.

I notice before going for my 6 week checkup that the angina sensation hits me every day when I'm at the end of my walk, I mention it to my cardiologist nurse practitioner who gives me a script for nitro and tells me if I find myself not getting any relief after 5 minutes and I've taken 3 nitro s call 911. What kind of recourse is that? Let's just put a band-aid on this problem. I did not like that resolution at all. Oh well, right? They are supposed to know what they are talking about? They are the Doctor after-all and we're just the guinea pigs.

Here is where my heart break begins. Fifteen years ago or more (not really sure since that memory is no longer a happy one) I decided that I wanted someone in my life that I knew would have unconditional love for me and I didn't have to feel as if my world needed a constant shake just to wake me up. The crazy part is I knew exactly who I wanted to have in my life that would give me this precious gift.

Emotions stagnant. In a space you’re used to but not comfortable with. You don’t mind it because it’s with family but the vibes of you connecting with everyone is different from my own. Looking at different aspects of everyone else’s life gives you perspective of life. Loneliness & positivity is what is given but unable to enjoy any moment at a party & bring everyone else to the limelight isn’t something that’s normally done. Joy & happiness through self love is what’s facilitated.

As humans unfortunately we will lose so many important people in our life. Some of us go through it too often and others from time to time. Its never easy losing a special person in our life , whether we know it may happen because of a disease or it happens unexpectedly . Never will it be easy to think that the people we have now will someday be gone or maybe we will go first , who knows. Death to me was something that I personally am not afraid of for myself , but if I do lose someone that I am close to and know so well I dread for that day . Thankfully I was able to grow up with my parents , grandparents ,siblings , and my extended family . Losing someone very close wasn't something that I really dealt with until I was 19 years old but even though I did lose someone close at a later age I still had to see some of my relatives go through personal heartbreak with them losing a very close loved one. Seeing them through that heartbreak made me see that life can be fragile and its short no matter how long you get to live. Death isn't something we ever want to live with but again its part of life .

This was a message from a person I have met once in my life. It was a day like every other day. An afternoon, while the sun was about to go down, I wanted to observe the beauty of mother nature, so I decided to go to the beach by myself. I was wandering on the border of the sea , enjoying the fresh air, and observing the place. Suddenly, my eyes caught a beautiful young woman. Her skin was glowing due to the sunshine that was hitting her melanin. She was their to complete the mother nature’s beauty. People couldn’t help gazing at her, but she looked unhappy. As a result, I decided to approach her and make her smile a little bit. Once I was beside her, I said with a big smile: