“You are so selfish, so inconsiderate!”

Ideally, you were quite perfect for me. You’re a very kind person, honest, caring, smart, talented and honestly, intimidatingly good at everything. You made me feel very safe and comfortable very quickly. You made me laugh and always remembered to say things that would light up my mood all the time when we were still together. Until out of nowhere, I told you we were finished.

Dear SD,



Cheating, similar to a painting, needs all of the pieces to come together to create the perfect picture. There are three people involved in cheating: the cheater, the person being cheated on, and last but not least, the person being cheated with. That basically sums up the triangle of cheating. I would guess that most of us have been in one part of the triangle or another at some point. The person being cheated on and the person being cheated with are just like an isosceles triangle in that they are equal in the hurt that can come from a cheater. 

How can one person that you put on this pedestal just let you down? How could one person that you “loved” so much end up hurting you so badly? Manipulative relationships could be the hardest thing to get over, but I don’t regret mine at all. He is the one person that I am so happy I met, but I never want him in my life again. He taught me everything about relationships. He was my first real boyfriend. The first real person to truly show an interest in me, and I held onto that because I thought that I would never find someone else that is romantically interested in me. However, I slowly started to learn (with the help of an amazing therapist and support system) that I do I deserve better than some boy yelling at me, calling me a bitch, and giving me the silent treatment.

I often wonder what it would be like if I stayed by your side, if we never broke up. My apartment felt empty the minute you left, and I stuffed your portion of the bed with silence and alcohol.

I confided in you, told you all my fears, my dreams, everything. You let me believe that opening up was going to be okay, that opening up to you was going to be a good thing.

Here's my story of one relationship I was in. I thought I found the right woman, but it didn't turn out too well.

As I sit here, in our old coffee shop, a flood of emotions have emerged.

Sometimes, we meet people who sparked and shined brighter than anyone else. For the lucky ones, they stay and end up together. For the unlucky ones, like you and me, it is fleeting. Perfect for a moment and gone the next.

All the movies and books and songs talk about falling in love. It is all romanticized... hyper-romanticized. But what about falling out of love? Why don't more people talk about that?

It can be a death, it can be a break up, it can be anything. In life, there will be a few times in which people leave. And it will always hurt. Here's some advice to try and lessen the pain and grow. This will be broken up into sections, so if you're here for a specific reason, skim through and try to find what you need. Breathe in, breathe out. Ready? Let's begin.