When the world first came crashing to a halt back in March my routine was completely thrown out the window. I lead a relatively active lifestyle, I swim every other day, I try to go to the gym a few times a week, I do yoga, I’m generally on the go rushing from one place to the next. And suddenly, I wasn’t doing any of these things, I couldn’t swim, I couldn’t do classes at the gym, there was nowhere for me to be. I felt the effect this had on the body, initally my mood was low, my routine was thrown out of the window. Luckily I managed to figure out a way to keep my body active, moving, from my very own home, which ultimately resulted in a better mood and lots of positive endorphins without leaving my own home.
It’s worse at night. It’s 11pm, I’m lay in bed reading a book, alarm set for eight, and suddenly my brain connects my recent fatigue, a sore throat, and choking on the quorn nuggets I ate for dinner (which FYI are delicious) into a fear that I may have some sort of incurable cancer. I open google, which is never a good thing yet I convince myself I’m being responsible checking on my health, and my mind spirals out of control when the symptoms I’ve been experiencing lead me onto the NHS page for oesophagus cancer. I’m overwhelmed, scared, panicked. I need someone to help me stop this disease but the doctors aren’t open, nobody is awake, nobody can help. What if the endoscopy I had 6 months ago missed something? What if I’ve been ignoring symptoms and it’s too late? What if the doctor won’t send me for tests due to coronavirus?