A Life Improvement I Made That I Wish I Had Done Sooner

When my diabetes developed complications 12 years ago , I could no longer work full time. I spent so much time in bed feeling ill and extremely lethargic I could not trust myself to be outdoors sometimes, fearing that I might collapse. As my doctor put it, my efforts were like trying to walk in treacle! To keep myself busy, and at least to utilise my brain, I took to the computer to do my writing, but that did nothing for my social life, or even basic exercise, which worried me daily, as exercise is often better than medication for that illness.

One day I read about online Meetup groups that were just beginning to become popular in the UK and decided to organise one in my area, to force myself to actually do something. I was motivated by my new trial drug which gave me hope of better things to come, as it seemed to be having some positive effects. Meetups provided a vehicle for single people, and those lacking local friendships, to access weekly events and interact with others without the anxiety or stress of dating. I wasn’t sure how it would go, or how many people would be interested, but I worked out a varied programme of event ideas I thought people might like (concerts, comedy, bands, cinema, quizzes games, etc.) and launched it with some trepidation.

In its first year, it attracted over 200 members, and from going out just once each week, by the second year I was attending events averaging four times weekly! I was amazed at this because often I really didn't feel like going out, but the presence of the growing membership, and my new obligations was a great motivational spur for me. They became a kind of family to me, checking on my welfare, too, and helping out where they could. It had over 380 members by the time I closed it three years later.

And the reason for closure?

Eight months after the launch, a guy walked into an event. He was not looking for a relationship as he was still smarting from his marriage break-up. He just wanted to socialise, and I was feeling too ill to bother about dating anyone. But there was instant attraction between us, which we thought wouldn't last because of our numerous differences in culture, colour, age, leisure activities - you name it, we had it! So we didn’t worry about anything developing.

Famous last words. We have recently celebrated our ninth year this November. He was the main cause of the Meetup closure because I wanted to give our relationship a chance to develop, and I really couldn't do both successfully. I did try, especially in the last year, as no one wanted the club to close, and some members were. hoping to repeat my success too! But it took a lot of work and there were no voulunteers to keep organising it. Very sad to leave it, I must say, but I had no regrets.

The biggest lesson I learnt from it was this: I started something for the benefit of others, and ended up benefiting myself in a most amazing way, which shows how life will always please itself when we least expect it. I thoroughly enjoyed organising the Meetup group, especially in the way members genuinely appreciated it and made use of it. Sometimes, I wish it had been around years before because it changed the life of many members in a positive way.

However, I give thanks for the time I experienced it because I probably would not have met my current partner (who said he had been having no luck on dating apps). The meetup group has certainly improved my life beyond my imagination, especially with such a caring a loving person to share it, and I will always marvel at how it came about.

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