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- The Stodgy Stogie -

By Jay KantorPublished 2 months ago Updated about a month ago 3 min read
Top Story - May 2024
Original 'Schtick' Art © KantorKreationsKolections

– To Protect & Serve~In the name of 'Love' –

Till Death do us Part - I 'Do' and I 'Won't' Forever - I Love you and God help me if I Ever Don't..!

If ignorance is 'Bliss' why aren't we happier - Eternal Spouse, Just as I Am, No Do-Overs - We Iz what we Iz.

Author's own

IS it you or me that's truly 'The Gift?' Our roles are day to day routine exchanges - now go get me a beer - and I'll hand over my paycheck, 'probably.' As I recall we shagged (3) times a day, now not at all. Could you have possibly found a more appealing man; I think, not!

Hanging out theories: Never feel the need to trim hair offa your chest. We may both have changed a bit over the years; ya, think! But, it seems to me that a little added 'Girth' makes it more interesting to find things. A lot of new adventures to romp through.

– It should go without saying: Since I Found you I can't wait to spend Forever with you ~ and Then-Some ~ Something like That? –

- Love means you won't hear me say I never want to see you again and don't let the door hit you in the ass. Give Piece to make Peace.

- Love means never feeling the need to leave the room when blowing 'wind' - but it might be a nice idea.

- Love means never having to say Speak to my Lawyer.

- Love means never having to say Honey Sugar Daddy, now the Monies gone so am I. Oops Forgot my Wallet.

- Saying 'I Do' is not a short sentence it’s a life sentence; no parole with good behavior. Compromise a two way street.

- Till death us do part ~ Well that’s always an option. PreNup anyone?

- Love is a four letter word, but I only married you for the other (4) Letter word.

Whew, "what was I thinking," (that should be my middle name). Love means fake it till you make it - now roll over and go to sleep. Perhaps my gesture of running to the corner liquor store for a PlasticPetuniaDaisy Bouquet brings up a desperate flare.

Any of these strike a chord – Is Silence really Golden?

Fellow Writer Kristen Balyeat messaged me, after reading my comment re; Rita Louise in 'Always' about dropping everything as I walked into the door for a big Hug, while having our Corgis stand in line {though often with a Corgi wrapped around her neck at the time - best simultaneous kissers ever}. As I told her how wanted it made me feel she excitedly told me she 'Hugs' her Hubby when he walks into the door; "Even when she's mad at him." Now That's 'Wedded~Bliss' and I thought of this story.

There’s a deal of difference in hugging and shagging. Carnal and Cuddling are not the same. Hugging someone as they come through the door, even though you’re mad at them stems from unconditional, non judgmental love and deep seated affection. I remember a girl once told me "Love is acceptance" - Nah - Simple yet quite profound. Shagging is so often just selfish self gratification. At times it doesn’t matter who the other person is, or if there even is another person involved, as it were.

I would turn into a Pencil-Neck-Geek always in need of reassurance. As a long neck Giraffe would peek around each corner to see what might be happening within our marriage always in need to peek at every movement that didn't involve me; ever been insecure like that?

– Love means never making your Mate feel 'Less~Than' –

Jay Kantor, Chatsworth, California

'Senior' Vocal Author - Vocal Village Community -


About the Creator

Jay Kantor

Retired: Write for "The Kids Someday"

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Excellent work. Looking forward to reading more!

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  1. Excellent storytelling

    Original narrative & well developed characters

  2. Heartfelt and relatable

    The story invoked strong personal emotions

  3. Compelling and original writing

    Creative use of language & vocab

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Comments (52)

  • Novel Allen23 days ago

    Hey Jay, I remember you asking how to deposit the story of writers on the Raise your voice thread. What I do is have two versions of Vocal open at the same time, then just grab the URL from the specific story on the authors original profile and plunk it down on a separate line below your words on your raise your voice comment. I hope I make sense.

  • ROCK about a month ago

    You are one in a gazillion; I want to lean toward Tom Robbins or clump you into some altruistic category however I do believe you've carved your own. Undeniable talent. A natural. What's there to improve? please keep writing as I am loving it.

  • Novel Allenabout a month ago

    Wow! Your artwork sure is improving, these are great. What a lovely sum up of the thoughts and feelings of many. Honestly and wonderfully wrought Jay. Better late than never. Congrats.

  • Karen Caveabout a month ago

    Love this! spicy and it has flair. Love the cartoons too. You should release a book of these :)

  • Paul Stewartabout a month ago

    I can see why this got Top Story. I wanted to say sorry for not getting to it fast enough. I love your musings and truthbombs and the witty way you so eloquently bring them out. I can attest to the fact that, in my 20+ years of marriage...much of what you have said is true. Thank you for giving these reminders and for bringing a smile to my face. I hope you're recovering well from your recent hopsital trip?

  • Esala Gunathilakeabout a month ago

    Congratulations on your top story.

  • Mark Gagnonabout a month ago

    J-Bud, just circling back to say congrats on your Top Story!

  • Denise E Lindquistabout a month ago

    Congratulations on top story!🎉🎉🎉 Loved the humor!😂

  • Nathal Nortan2 months ago

    I have put your statement "I do is a short sentence but a life sentence" in my notes. I will use it someday. Courtesy of you. Thanks once again.

  • Caroline Craven2 months ago

    I do is a short sentence but a life sentence!!! Haha! Jay, you’re hilarious!

  • Nathal Nortan2 months ago

    Thanks, very interesting

  • Abdul Qayyum2 months ago

    Nice writing keep it up

  • Heather Zieffle 2 months ago

    Congratulation on Top Story! Good read!

  • Christy Munson2 months ago

    Congratulations on Top Story!

  • Thavien Yliaster2 months ago

    This to me sort of reads as "the death of a marriage."

  • Back to say congratulations on your Top Story! 🎉💖🎊🎉💖🎊

  • I love it... This is great. We can always use a laugh for two throughout our day and you certainly delivered. Excellent work!

  • Carol Townend2 months ago

    I love the humour in this piece, Jay!

  • Lacy Loar-Gruenler2 months ago

    Had to stop back and say yay, well deserved TS, J-Bud, and it's a deserving doozy!!!

  • Margaret Brennan2 months ago

    congratulations on TS. this is fantastic, and so on point Love it.

  • Shirley Belk2 months ago

    Look at you with that Top Story!

  • Babs Iverson2 months ago

    Love your humorously written story!!! ❤️❤️💕 Congratulations on Top Story too!!!

  • Caroline Jane2 months ago

    😅 These anecdotes are JK in LA's unique version of "Love Is..." the 60/70s comic strip. Good gas as always! ✌️❤️

  • Cathy holmes2 months ago

    Congrats on the TS.

  • You have such a great writing style Jay. Great job and congratulations on your well-deserved top story

Jay KantorWritten by Jay Kantor

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