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My Emotional Support Dinosaur

Nothing like a sweet little treat to take the edge off

By J. R. LowePublished 23 days ago Updated 19 days ago 2 min read
Top Story - May 2024
My Emotional Support Dinosaur
Photo by Chris Long on Unsplash

I bring it with me always

Everywhere I go

To work, to shops, to parties,

Because it takes away my woe.

I scarcely need to feed it,

Because much to my delight,

It likes to snack on all my problems,

To stem its appetite.

When my boss made me redundant,

It squashed him into paste,

And when the in-laws came to visit,

None of them went to waste.

When the bus left my stop too early,

And I missed it by just the slightest tick,

My dino chewed it down to shrapnel,

And used it as a toothpick.

When my ex found a new lover

It had a two-course meal,

It used all our photos as a napkin,

And garnished them with onion peel.

When the Uber to the party

Cancelled without the slightest warning,

My great big hungry lizard,

Had it for breakfast in the morning.

When the neighbour’s dog barked one night

So loudly it woke me up,

My dino had a midnight snack

And devoured that yappy pup.

When the woman at the grocer,

Pushed in line and cut me off,

She was crunched up ever so quickly

I barely got to scoff.

When the buff guys at the gym

Laughed and made me insecure,

It had a high protein snack,

And turned them to manure.

When the police came by my house

To place me under arrest

My dino found their badges

Tricky to digest.

When they brought in the airforce,

All their efforts were in vain,

Because the last thing those pilots heard was

‘Here comes the aeroplane’.

When they sent in the subs,

And ships full of marines

It cracked them open and ate them up

Like tins of angry blue sardines.

When the last man surrendered,

And met his own demise,

I saw my dinosaur had grown,

To an incomprehensible new size.

But now I have no problems left,

Its stomach’s sounding oh so hollow,

And it’s looking at me like

Something it wants to swallow.

I try to find more problems,

For it to chew and maul on,

But I know it’s gonna eat me because

I’ve been the problem all along.

humorMental Health

About the Creator

J. R. Lowe

By day, I'm a PhD student, by night.... I'm still a PhD student, but sometimes I procrastinate by writing on Vocal. Based in Australia.

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Reader insights

Outstanding

Excellent work. Looking forward to reading more!

Top insights

  1. Compelling and original writing

    Creative use of language & vocab

  2. Excellent storytelling

    Original narrative & well developed characters

  3. Heartfelt and relatable

    The story invoked strong personal emotions

Add your insights

Comments (26)

  • Hossain Shiblu16 days ago

    Back to Say my write.Congrats. Hey, I am hossain. I really appreciated your written fiction. you see my write i Think you we'll like it.

  • ROCK 16 days ago

    Omg, so hilarious 😂. I loved it. I feel sorry for the pup getting munched up though. Clever you are indeed!

  • Fantastic writing.

  • Tina D'Angelo19 days ago

    I loved it! Oh, to have my own personal dinosaur!

  • shanmuga priya21 days ago

    Congratulations 🎉

  • Luksi Bayou21 days ago

    Funny and prophetic!

  • This is really beautifully done. The way the tone shifts from proud to resigned is phenomenal. There's a really powerful, evocative sense of anger too. Wonderful job writing this! And congrats on the Top Story!

  • great set of lines for the challenge really enjoyed it

  • Katerina Petrou22 days ago

    The ending... loved it!

  • My warm congratulations.

  • Robyn Peterson22 days ago

    Very insightful.

  • Back to say congratulations on your Top Story! 🎉💖🎊🎉💖🎊

  • Christy Munson23 days ago

    Oooh love the ending so much ! Congratulations on Top Story 🥳⭐️👍

  • Babs Iverson23 days ago

    Hilarious!!! ROTFL!!!💕❤️❤️ Congratulations on Top Story too!!!

  • Ada Zuba23 days ago

    so funny yet very relatable! Great story!

  • Dana Crandell23 days ago

    Masterfully written, hilarious, and bonus points for the moral!

  • Margaret Brennan23 days ago

    omg, this is hilarious. I love it. fantastic.

  • angela hepworth23 days ago

    Haha funny and so poignant as well! Loved your work here.

  • JBaz23 days ago

    A funny poem with a lesson to be learned with your final lines. Congratulations

  • The Dani Writer23 days ago

    Truly hilarious and so well done! Congratulations on the top story!

  • Randy Baker23 days ago

    Excellent! Fun read and I love the ending twist.

  • Paul Stewart23 days ago

    What did I tell you? Hm, Congrats on Top Story!

  • Grz Colm23 days ago

    Much fun J.R! 😁👍 🦖

  • Cathy holmes23 days ago

    Tiny blue sardines. Lol. This is hilarious. Well done.

  • Hahahahahahhaahhahaha this was hilarious! I was gonna ask you where do I find myself a dino like that but changed my mind when I reached the ending. Lol

J. R. LoweWritten by J. R. Lowe

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