Dating Advice: Are You Too Judgmental or Too Picky?
How is this working for you and do you honestly want a potential relationship?
How would you describe yourself in 3 sentences?
Do you think people know the “real you?”
With less “face to face” contact due to online dating & social media outlets, people are spending more time behind a computer and becoming even more judgmental than ever before.
All it takes is the click of a mouse or a swipe to the right and we are on to the next more attractive profile photo without giving any thought to getting to know someone who isn’t our idea of a perfect 10!
Vanity is taking on a whole new look these days because there is so much more importance placed on physical appearance than ever before! Many people are spending too much time posting selfies or half naked photos all over Facebook, Snapchat & Instagram.
Why are they trying to impress complete strangers out in Cyberland?
Insecurities lie deep within the majority of the population because many people are not comfortable in their own skin; so that when meeting someone for the first time, many men & women are very judgmental and label each other very quickly.
When we are not happy with ourselves, we tend to find fault in others.
It is our own responsibility of how we allow ourselves to be portrayed! Clothes, attitude, hairstyles and body art, all make an initial statement regardless of whether we think it should. It is a form of expression and usually a big part of who we are at the time.
Dying your hair fuchsia, having 20 facial piercings, overdone plastic surgery and full body tattoos will definitely get you attention. It is human nature and society that makes the general public react with a quick summation to something that is “out of the norm.”
Don’t be pissed off or surprised when people stare because that is who you want to be at that particular time and you should be proud of it or change it!
Honestly ask yourself if this is truly the first impression you want to "give off" to people. Could it be that you are rebelling due to some internal anger or hurt? Body language behavior is an open window to your true character.
First impressions are the building blocks to a second date, which is why it is strongly advised to be “attitude ready” when you are looking for that special person to share your life with.
People can change and that includes you. If you feel your past is somewhat questionable with some of the choices that you have made, the first step is to own them, acknowledge them & forgive yourself.
Everyone makes mistakes in relationships or dating scenarios but they do not always admit or accept their part in the repetitive turmoil that surrounds them. Blaming your life choices on others will only keep you in denial and block your future happiness.
Asking for help is a great way to move towards a positive direction. Having someone to talk to like a counselor/coach, trusted friend or family member can help you with your subconscious actions that may be damaging your chance at finding a loving person to share your life with.
Once you start seeing the good in people and believe you can have a healthy relationship, you will start to attract the right people towards you.
Every time you meet someone new, say 3 things nice about them which will override any negative comments that could sabotage your connection with them. (You can either verbalize this out loud to them or just say it to yourself. The point is to remove any pessimism that you may initially feel.)
Always focus on the bright & shiny; not the dark & dismal.
Being judgmental doesn’t work for anyone and keeps people in a relationship pattern of short lived partnerships. Don’t get stuck thinking it will never change.
We all have a past but it is how we deal with our future that defines our happiness.
We are ALL beautiful and ALL deserve love in our lives. <3
Susan McCord @ The Dear Sybersue Talk Show