I've decided I am finished dating until I am 50. This is, and at the same time, is not a pleasant thought, but it is what it is. I have made this decision because it's not only the responsible thing to do but after a lot of discussions with my daughter, her life is already confusing enough without me adding a stranger into the mix. The circumstances revolving around her being from a broken home are traumatic enough, not to mention the trauma it caused me on a personal level. Trauma I have since turned into a strength, but trauma nonetheless.
Never in a millions years would I have thought that I would be getting divorced. We’ve been together for 15 years total, but we’ve only been married 7 years. August 17th, made 7 years. This year has been nothing but a revelation. Anything and everything that could happen did. In January my husband and I got into a heated argument over the taxes. We were to receive a return and the IRS confiscated it due to debit I owed. In 2017, I elected to remove a large sum of money from an account that was not collecting any interest. Before I could have it deposited into my bank account, I would have to pay taxes on it. From my understanding, that process was handled and the money was deposited. 2019 rolls around and here I am being slapped with a 10,000 dollar tax debt because the federal tax amount that was deducted was a improper amount. Apparently the amount taken was 10,000 dollars short of their prior calculation. My husband, who works Overseas as a contractor, emails me in a rage. The conversation was all about how hard he works for his money and because I neglected to pay my taxes, they took his money. Nevermind that we filed together and I work as well. We are arguing back and forth and I tell him that I’m going to get the money (our tax refund) back. At this point, I need to get on the ball and figure out something.
You buy the test, you pee on the stick, the lines turn pink and your dreams are finally coming true. All the months of trying have finally given you your rainbow baby...but then the bottom drops out. The man you love, the man of your dreams. changes before your eyes. Slowly but surely, he becomes someone you don't even recognize anymore. He plays the game so well, you are the only one that sees it. The changes are small at first, easily explained by the stress of a third child on the way. He starts drinking more frequently and heavier. Blackout nights become the norm, instead of the random occurence they once were.
Divorce can not only be stressful because of the impact it can have on you emotionally, but also because of all of the changes that often come along with it. Not only is a relationship ending, but many other aspects of your life will change or be affected in some way, as well. While this may seem daunting initially, the reality is that it can be an opportunity to make positive changes, and rebuild your life. If you're trying to learn how to adjust, or maybe even embrace, your new life alone here are some things to consider.
I just got back from dropping off my former father-in-law at my exes house, so he can visit with my daughter. Our topic of discussion on the drive over veered toward the same topic it often does when we're together. Why his daughter, my ex, is the way she is and how she is destroying her life while alienating all the good influences around her.
You can not make this sh*t up and I kid you not with these stories. All events in my stories are 100% true and have happened to me. For years people have said I should write these things down because the sh*t that happens to me, is film worthy. I wont contact Hollywood just yet, not until all the pedos are gone but trust me when I say, this is film worthy!
I was young, dumb, and believed I had the world in my fingertips. Let’s start where I met this man, whom I believed was the most amazing person in the universe. He said all of the right things, treated me like I was the most important person in the world. He was a smooth talking, make you laugh, take you places type of guy. He didn’t have a house of his own... said he just got divorced and she took everything. He had two kids, which he said he saw all the time. I was excited and ready to start my new life with him.
Everyone wants that dream life. The dream husband, house, dogs, white picket fence in a safe town. Until, my life went to shambles while maintaining the “perfect military wife vibe” made that white picket fence didn’t mean anything, anymore. You never know you’re in the situation you’re in until you leave it. Even, if it’s just for a week. I’ve always been a pleaser. One who wants to make everyone happy. I was my abuser’s dream because he could gaslight me however he wanted too. I was his property. One hit, boom. Second hit, “I’m so sorry I love you so much, until he’s strangling me outside the house.” Third time. Fourth time. Fifth time. It still wasn’t enough. It took a year of me being isolated with this monster to realize how truly afraid of him I was.
1 When you’re married to an addict, your whole life turns upside down. Chaos naturally accompanies the disease of addiction. What used to be a happy home can quickly take on the appearance of a circus – especially if your spouse is actively abusing drugs.
How do I start? I mean, when your world has just been blown into tiny bits and your heart has been ripped from your chest, how do you keep going? How do you stop the ever flowing acidic tears? How do you stop feeling your heart being ripped out over and over? How do you keep living?
The wrench and anguish of an abruptly dissolved relationship can be enough to cause many people to crumple up into a ball and hide for months from the world, others it can make explode into fits of rage of rage and violence, others still have this chronic compulsion to find a new relationship as soon as their old one ends. All are relatively normal ways to deal with the death of a a particular relationship. In the case of a divorce, that relationship carries many additional complications often including kids and assets and child support and alimony, dividing up of shared friend groups and dividing up personal items, finding a new place to live, learning to acknowledge the failures that lead to divorce, and gaining a certain stigma, even if it is self impose. Being married young and filing divorce within 4 years leaves a lot of life to live out as a failure in love.