satire
Humor and satire to make you laugh. Everyone loves a good innuendo.
Scan-And-Dinavia!
Like most cut dancers, I began my career at a young age doing revue shows on cruise ships. It's a great job to have when you're young because at that age you don't realize that the rules of the ship basically strip you of your independence. Plus Royal Caribbean allows employees to drink in the crew bar at age 18 so its a great way to sew some oats and save some money before you decide to become a real adult. Although I tend to only have negative things to say about my cruise ship days because of their "always on the job" mentality, I actually had a shit load of fun, saw some amazing sights, and made a few life long friends who I still keep in touch with today.
[email protected]Published 4 years ago in FilthyThe First Rule of Steamroom is that You Don't Talk About Steamroom
I have to admit that the title of this blog is a tiny bit misleading... Although I've had my fair share of steamroom visits, I can only think of one that ever got sexual and the steamroom section of this story doesn't even involve me (oddly enough). However, it does still happen to be one of the sluttiest days of my life and the title of the blog was a quote from one of my friends a couple of days later so I felt it was an appropriate heading.
[email protected]Published 4 years ago in FilthyStranger Dick
This is one of those moments where I wish I had an iPhone so I could take a screen shot of my contact list or text thread just for the sake of showing you that the story I'm about to tell you is 100% true. I almost titled this one "Why I Deleted My Adam4Adam Account" but considering this is how he's saved in my phone I decided to go with the more concise "Stranger Dick."
[email protected]Published 4 years ago in FilthyShe Footsie
I’m sure I’m not the only one trying to find different avenues of making money, especially during this pandemic. So with that being said I tried to step into the world of Foot Fetish. I attempted to create an Instagram account revolving around my feet. I mean if my feet can make me extra cash on the side, why not see how far they can take me. So I gathered some feet photos & started up my Instagram account “She_Footsie”.
Malia Leialoha EnosPublished 4 years ago in FilthyI GOT TURNED DOWN 5 TIMES IN THE CLUB!
This happened last year before the start of the corona and trust me when I say it was a true story. I don;t want to give you a novel so I will try and keep this story straight to the point. I had not gone clubbing for a while and I had a previous work colleague who was travelling to India to visit his family. He had not been for sometime. So it was one of those scenarios we had to go out before he flew out. Because it was such short notice and it only ended up being me and him! He was not really the social type! Like he could talk but he could not really talk to ladies. I was not any better but I could at least hold a conversation. The idea was not to pull but just have a good time as we spent a majority of our time working and never really get the chance to enjoy ourselves.
Emmanuel AtunsiriPublished 4 years ago in FilthyDon’t Be A D*ck. Be a Pussy.
Supple, soft and self sufficient. With the right care; hydrated and alert. I can just hear Bruce lee’s voice as I imagine what alternative advice he would give me if I asked him of which genitalia I should embody in life. If you don’t get that reference. Just youtube Bruce Lee ‘Be Water.’ I’ve got more important things to explain.
Victory BlackPublished 4 years ago in FilthySo Are You Saying Yes... ?
Picture the scene: we are in the dungeons of the inquisition, deep below Toledo. The shivering victim has been undressed, "examined," and is now lashed across a bench in the flickering torchlight. A grim figure approaches, in his hands—a devilish instrument of torture. The orange glow of the brazier reflects from its jagged metal surface. The victim's eyes widen. Her pretty lips are quickly moistened in fear (and... just perhaps... arousal?)
James MissagliaPublished 6 years ago in FilthyFive Perverse but True Sexual Facts That Prove Humans of All Races are Equal
This article is a companion piece to the video series. Sex! I have it (luckily), you have it (hopefully), we all have it (right?), and we all love it (again, hopefully). As there are countless human beings who don't seem to be cognizant of the fact that all human beings are indeed in fact human beings, I decided it would be a good idea, through the use of sexual practices, to prove that humans are all the same, despite minor, unimportant differences. So sit back, relax, and enjoy this list of 100% true facts that prove if you look like a person, and if you talk like a person, chances are, you're probably a person.
Aubrey KatePublished 6 years ago in FilthyFancy A Snow Job? Does This ‘Game Of Thrones’ Porn Parody Have Less Sex Than The Show Itself?
From Edward Penishands to Night of the Living Milfs, we all love a good porn parody — you name it, someone has probably done it. Whether it be an X-rated version of the '60s Batman series or a homosexual take on Twilight (dubbed Twinklight), no franchise is safe, and the porn business means big bucks. So, with this in mind, it was only a matter of time before someone somewhere decided to take all the dicks and dragons of Westeros and turn #GameofThrones into a peen-filled parody porno.
Tom ChapmanPublished 6 years ago in FilthyKyle Has Ruined My Life
So the other day, I was just cruising Twitter, minding my own business, and I stumble across this: Kyle. What. Have. You. Done?
Shelby TaylorPublished 6 years ago in FilthyIs My P***y Pretty?
I've always loved my body and have long time been a big fan of people loving themselves and being confident in that love of your body & self. Myself, in particular, I love and enjoy every extra curve, skin tone hues from top to bottom and yes, even my stretch marks, as far as I'm concerned are road maps to chocolate goodness. Even though we live in the day and age where it's easy to walk into a doctors office and order up a bigger ass, tits that sit up and a flat tummy, I've never thought of going that route. Not only because I can't afford it but also because I always get really nervous when I have to go 'under' for any type of surgery so for me, even if I could afford it, the thought of risking my life (you do risk your life every time you go into surgery...for real...don't believe me? Look it up then!) to let a doctor cut me up and change my body just so I can be what society now calls a perfect body is absolutely ridiculous. If anything, I'm loving my body, celebrating how it looks as is and my other half loves and enjoys every bit of it. Everything is perfect as far as he's concerned and that's how it should be.
Women's Sexuality: A Constant Criticism
For years, I have grown with boys who are now men, who have proudly worn their sexuality on their backs like a rucksack. Times are changing and women want to do this too. I know I certainly do and would, why are we so squeamish when it comes to women talking about sex?
Maisie HancoxPublished 7 years ago in Filthy