Living Through Positivity & Kindness
The Inner Fight of Climb
I lay here in silence. Wondering what will come up next for the day. Circling through what to do, I feel dead inside. Unmotivated, unwilling to be happy. Struggling to find cause, unknown faculties outside my control pulls you down and you feel nothing but heavy. You are trying to hold on to what's right and what is good but you find comfort in the void.
The Expectations of Reality
Here we are again. A new month, a similar but different look. The weather has changed and there’s more ways to communicate with people. So much so, that old habits rise again. Yeah they die hard but it’s suppose to be a reminder of once was and our strength to bring them down.
The Emo Game
You walk along these streets that feel so familiar. What would look like people having a good time and being active, is actually a bunch of mindless zombies a slave to their phones without attention their peers. Social media and online entertainment has a way of grabbing you to their ecosystem. Sounds of guitars and soft melodies surround my ears as music play. Restless and reoccurring emotions rapidly break through the surface. You feel water drip down your face and you wonder why. You have seen this place before. These buildings with people who occupy them. You try to figure out the root of the problem, all that comes up are shame and unhappiness.
VeggieGrill - NYC
Traveling along the busy streets of New York City, I find myself taking in the beauty and art of its authentic scenery. From the tall buildings and skyscrapers, to the glass infrastructure. In a time of masks and social distancing, it’s easy to forget the beauty of the world. Wondering through the world around you, even by yourself gives you a chance to see the world as it is and the natural environment. Like a traveler going to another state or country, you explore while viewing new (and old) venues in hopes to get inspired.
The art of wait is perplexing. The idea of having time pass by without the notion of doing something. The most time wasted is sleep, but it's also the best time needed. We recover our energy, digest what needs to be digested & heal our wounds. This also helps with the mind. Whether you're dreaming or unconscious the mind travels to places unfamiliar to the confines of the brain when awake. Sometimes patience is hard when your life comes to a late beginning. Its not that you waited so long for things to take place, it's that you have been on survival mode most of your life and now that you have some breathing room, its like you're starting over from the beginning. Starting from a place where you have supporters from a distance. Where everyone now has been on their own journey that now you have to start this journey separated from everyone.
The Obsessed and the Obsession
This fusion of change and adaptation I cannot hide. These feeling that swirl around in your head makes the mind go wild. Some moments cloud your brain and it can feel like it’s the only thing in your life that brings you joy. You obsess over the ideas of what if but instead of seeing a future with what could be, you become someone that craves the idea of wanting and chasing.
The Rollercoaster of Life
Up and down the rollercoaster goes. The fun continues until the stomach starts to set in. Had something before to keep me on top but slight triggers took hold tonight. Settling in to something comfortable and enjoy the ride through. Now with the trigger you can’t help but fall under. Like the scent of a cigarette that passes by, a moment takes over your being and you fall into the darkness of despair.
The Blooming Pedals of Spring
Bright iridescent lights flow through the windows. Warm breeze fills the room to welcome a new day. Groggy and lazy you tumble around struggling to get up. You check the time only to be right on time with the morning routines. You shuffle to get up and find a bed of flowers surrounding you. Yellow golden pedals blooming before your very eyes. You wonder if you’re still in a dream or that you’ve already died. You come to terms with whats been happening and you proceed with caution.