The Stressless Pessimist

In a society that is becoming more and more demanding, we are pulled in all directions. We are expected to satisfy a demanding boss, make a no fault party for friends, meet the expectations of our clients, and much more. It is becoming increasingly difficult to live a life free from the fear of not being good enough, the fear of an imminent exam, the fear of a department head’s evaluation, and, above all, the fear of taking on increasingly tough challenges. Of course, exercise strengthens our muscles, in the same manner, taking on more responsibility increases our ability to face them. But what about those who, at the eve of a dangerous deadline, panic and give up instead of taking responsibility? I know what that can be like because I’ve been there. Here, a technique called Pre-mortem can help! It is a concept developed by the psychologist Gary Klein. It involves projecting ourselves into the future, assuming that an event has already failed. We foresee the bad end, choosing the worst possible scenario. In that way, we play the game of a pessimist, so to say… but not for long! We then ask ourselves what caused the failure. This approach allows us to anticipate potential negative factors in order to avoid them.

Here are some examples to clarify the concept:

• You have just landed your dream job! Congratulations! The pre-mortem technique paradoxically involves telling yourself: “I’ve been fired after three years in the company! What were the causes of this loss? What were the difficulties that led to this dismissal? How did I go about seeking help?” You should brainstorm all the possible causes of this presumed dismissal in order to find solutions from day one at your job. This will help you, if the reflection is well done, to anticipate the different difficulties that could arise in the company, such as relationship problems, communication problems with superiors, problems between colleagues, etc., in order to live with less stress when these events occur.

• We can also think of a great dinner we are organizing with friends. Even before we start planning, we can have a meeting with our friends to apply the pre-mortem strategy. During this meeting, we assume that the dinner has already taken place. We project ourselves to the end of this evening where everything has gone wrong! Now, we ask ourselves what went wrong: How come the meat deliverer didn’t arrive on time? How come some guests got lost in town? How come the cream pie burned? etc.. Once we’ve identified the possible causes, we will look for appropriate solutions to prevent these problems.

It should be noted that the pre-mortem approach does not appeal to everyone! The reason is simple: some people believe that this approach encourages pessimism and allows pessimists to give free rein to their imagination! However, I believe that the difference between a pessimist and someone who uses the pre-mortem strategy lies in the conclusions they both reach at the end of the brainstorming session. The first person will suggest giving up the project. The second person will feel more confident in their ability to execute the project because they have found, in the pessimist’s warnings, important risk factors to avoid. After all, the better prepared we are for an oncoming storm, the less stress we will have to face it. The same is true for every part of our lives. Finally, to reduce stress, let’s play the game of pessimists and let’s come out optimists and stress free!

Now after all, something occurs that you didn’t plan? Welcome to real life! That is quite normal. In the same manner that we expect some clouds or enjoy a shooting star in a starry night, real life is made with surprises. It is this very fact that makes the difference between a postcard and real life! So NO STRESS!