The most insidious people have four things in common

What secret of life have you discovered?

The most liked answer was: "If you are scolded by others, but think about it in your mind for a day, it is equal to being scolded by others for a whole day."

Netizens have lamented that "it is too right", "it is clearly the scolding person did wrong, but the scolding person spent the whole day inside"......

Japanese writer Yataro Matsuura said, "Those who suffer from constant insecurity and anxiety tend to 'think too much' about the future."

I argued with my colleagues because of my work. I wondered if they were trying to get in your way on purpose, and whether it would be more difficult to work in the future.

I carefully selected the photo and wording and posted it on moments, but few people liked it or commented on it, causing a stir in my heart. Why don't my friends pay attention to me anymore?

Work involves contacting a partner, thinking for a long time about how to ask, fearing rejection, and even figuring out what to tell your boss if you don't get the deal done.

Put it off to the point of no further delay, connect with the other person, but surprisingly smooth, just wasted a lot of struggle and precious time...

There is an old Chinese saying: Those who have a heart are tired, but those who don't have a heart are indifferent.

Most of the time, people live tired, not because too many things, too difficult, but too much mental internal consumption.

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There is a short film called "Saturday" in Italy. On an ordinary weekend morning, a man living alone eats a banana and plans his work list for today: washing dishes, washing clothes, taking out the garbage, paying bills, cleaning the bathroom, calling his mother and finding something interesting to do in the evening...

He went over everything in his mind, what would be the best thing to do first, and anticipated the best and worst consequences of everything, trying to find the best way to do things.

Soon the sun was falling, the moon was setting in the treetops, and the day was over. The laundry was still in the hamper, the bills were not paid, and the man had done nothing, but he felt exhausted.

Think of the people in the farming era. Every day they would come back from the fields and gather together to talk about their families, eat and sleep, and still be full of energy the next day... Why are there so few modern people mentally tired?

In the Inner period, the "996 Fubao Theory" encourages people to regard overspending their bodies, sacrificing their families and staying up late indefinitely as the spirit of The Times. At the same time, it creates extreme consumerism and makes people feel that they are advanced, successful and at the forefront of The Times when they consume excessively and ahead of time.

People have more and more things they "want" : a new lipstick number, a new phone, a trip on demand...

My inner anxiety is constantly amplified. When I decide to learn a new thing, I find that there is too much to learn and I have the anxiety that I cannot finish learning. Then I think that learning will not necessarily make my life better, and I have the anxiety that "learning is useless"......

I didn't take any action, but I couldn't stop my brain from working at high speed.

In physics, there is a concept called "entropy", which is a physical quantity measuring the chaos and order of the material world. Increasing entropy indicates that things are moving toward disorder and chaos, while decreasing entropy indicates that things are moving toward order.

Entropy increase describes the ultimate evolutionary law of everything.

From the decay of the sun's burning, to the increase in entropy of the immune system and cell fission, to the chaos of living in a room, boiling water, and using a mobile phone...

Entropy increase is the process from order to disorder, from simple to complex.

Internally, too, as entropy increases, we feel disorganized and restless; As entropy goes down, our hearts return to order and peace, filled with happiness.

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From Internal Consumption to Flow points out that internal consumption tends to have four typical commonalities.

Perfectionism and obsessive tendencies: Expect too much of yourself, obsess over details, and either overdo or delay action.

Focusing on uncontrollable outcomes: dwelling on the past and the future, hiding from reality.

High sensitivity, low self-esteem: overly concerned about others' words and deeds, always feel related to themselves, fall into suspicion but dare not to face to face confirmation.

High stress, low desire: unable to find stressors, unable to speak clearly about their feelings, over-thinking, deliberately repressing normal needs.

The source of internal friction is the constant addition of the external world, and the way to reduce internal friction is to subtract from one's life and heart.

For example, complete disengagement: discarding items that are not needed or have no preservation value, deleting apps that kill time;

Boost dopamine: Have a certain amount of exercise time every day, running, playing ball;

Block negative feedback sources: psychologically block people who always bring you trash emotions, even family members and colleagues. If you can't block them, you will reduce the frequency of communication and refuse unnecessary meetings. Don't pay attention to trending news; Not engaging in tea room chatter;

Stop fantasy source: do not read all will let oneself think too much of the book, drama, variety show; Do not do any activities that will make you projective, such as star worship, sex;

Stop the source of addiction: quit smoking, alcohol, sugar, coke; Reject any online and mobile games that offer incentives.

Stick to minimalist consumption: don't buy anything you don't need within a week, such as daily necessities, clothes, digital products; Reject all channels that lead to premature spending and overspending, such as credit cards and online loans;

Do meditative breathing: Close your eyes or face a white wall 3 times a day. Do meditative breathing for 10 minutes each time to clear your mind and lighten your mental load.

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Wu Bofan, a journalist, once said, "We are constantly struggling to get rid of laziness, inertia and social constraints on ourselves. It seems that we are fighting against the outside world, but in essence we are fighting against the increase of mental entropy.

When our mental energy and purpose are in a state of order, we are in a state of low entropy.

In other words, anti-attrition is essentially anti-entropy increase, and the most powerful tool against entropy is focus.

Forbes magazine has quoted statistics as saying that the average modern person has 70,000 thoughts running through his or her mind every day. Add social media, streaming and other forms of entertainment that never stop, and it becomes more difficult to get your work done and rest.

Without goals to pursue and friends to interact with, focus and motivation begin to dissipate. Once the mind is scattered, people tend to drill into the corner, think of some problems without solutions, into internal friction.

The complex world arouses people's endless desire, brings more noise, and constantly wears away our judgment and action power.

In the midst of the hustle and bustle, subtract for your mind and focus your mental energy on goals that have a sense of engagement and meaning. Time slips by, and instead of feeling tired, you feel relaxed after being fully engaged.

This is probably the most effective way to reduce internal friction.

I don't know if you are reading the mental exhaustion, if you have any ideas, welcome to leave a comment, we discuss ~

~This is Ant, and I hope you find pleasure in each of my articles~