ADHD: Why Am I Like This? Part 10: Hyperfocus

By this point in my investigation, I had begun questioning almost everything I thought I knew about ADHD.

Then I encountered another contradiction.

If ADHD is an attention disorder...

Why could I sometimes pay attention for twelve straight hours?

That became another clue.

The Rabbit Hole

Anyone who knows me has probably seen it happen.

I'll begin researching one question.

Three hours later, I've somehow connected ADHD, Thomas Jefferson, Altoids, Danbury hat makers, and a Connecticut pickle law into one coherent theory about human nature.

I'll have fifteen browser tabs open.

Three books beside me.

A notebook full of observations.

I'll forget to eat.

Forget to answer text messages.

Forget the time.

Forget that the rest of the world still exists.

When I'm in that state, attention isn't my problem.

Stopping is.

The Laundry Test

Then something strange happens.

The washing machine beeps.

The laundry needs folding.

A five-minute task.

Suddenly, I have no motivation whatsoever.

How could my brain spend an entire Saturday researching something nobody asked me to learn...

...yet struggle to fold a shirt?

For years, I had only one explanation.

I must be lazy.

That conclusion became harder to defend every time it happened.

Because lazy people don't accidentally work for twelve hours.

That became another clue.

What the Research Says

As I dug deeper, I discovered that researchers have increasingly challenged the very name Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder.

Many now argue that ADHD is not primarily a disorder of attention.

It's a disorder of attention regulation.

People with ADHD are often capable of extraordinary concentration.

The difficulty is directing that concentration where and when it is needed.

Interest.

Novelty.

Challenge.

Urgency.

Those tend to capture attention almost effortlessly.

Routine.

Repetition.

Low stimulation.

Those often don't.

The problem isn't the engine.

It's the steering wheel.

That immediately resonated with me.

Hyperfocus Isn't Itself a Superpower

Social media often describes hyperfocus as the hidden superpower of ADHD.

I understand why.

Hyperfocus can feel incredible.

You learn faster.

Notice patterns.

Solve difficult problems.

Create.

Build.

Write.

Hours disappear.

But every gift casts a shadow.

While I'm hyperfocused, I also forget to eat.

Ignore my phone.

Miss appointments.

Lose track of time.

Completely forget that laundry still exists.

Hyperfocus isn't unlimited productivity.

It's attention that has become difficult to redirect.

That's a very different thing.

The Detective Board

Looking back, I realized something else.

The same mind that struggles to fold laundry also wrote this series.

The same brain that forgets where it put the keys also spends hours connecting psychology, history, neuroscience, childhood memories, and research into one larger picture.

That's how I think.

Not in straight lines.

In connections.

I don't chase facts.

I chase patterns.

I've come to think of hyperfocus this way:

Hyperfocus lets me see the forest for the trees... but not necessarily find my way out of it.

I can become so absorbed in understanding the whole picture that I lose sight of the next practical step.

Perhaps that isn't separate from my ADHD.

Perhaps it's one of its defining characteristics.

That became another clue.

A Better Explanation

For years, I believed my inability to start certain tasks meant I lacked discipline.

Now I think the problem was different.

My brain wasn't asking,

"Is this important?"

It was asking,

"Is this interesting?"

Those are very different questions.

Understanding that hasn't removed my responsibility.

Laundry still needs folding.

Emails still need answering.

Bills still need paying.

But it has changed how I approach those tasks.

Instead of waiting for motivation to magically appear, if I can't automate a task, I try to create interest.

One of my favorite examples is laundry.

I actually bought one of those retail store shirt-folding boards.

Not because folding shirts neatly is difficult.

I roll them Marie Kondo-style anyway.

But using the board makes folding shirts just interesting enough that my brain is willing to participate.

I've learned that my brain responds surprisingly well to novelty.

I race the timer.

Turn chores into games.

Pair boring tasks with music or a podcast.

Break projects into absurdly small steps.

Sometimes I simply begin.

Momentum often follows.

Not always.

But more often than waiting for inspiration.

What I've Learned

For years, I believed I lacked discipline.

Now I think I was asking my brain to operate in a way it simply wasn't designed to.

Hyperfocus taught me something I never expected.

My greatest weakness and one of my greatest strengths appear to come from the same place.

Many of the traits I've spent years trying to "fix" are inseparable from the traits that make me curious, creative, funny, and capable of seeing connections other people miss.

Perhaps that's why trying to eliminate those parts of myself never worked.

I wasn't trying to remove my weaknesses.

I was accidentally trying to remove some of my strengths as well.

I've stopped asking why I can't force myself to think like everyone else.

I'm learning to ask a better question.

How do I build a life that takes advantage of the way my mind naturally works while protecting me from the ways it naturally doesn't?

That realization changed more than the way I think about ADHD.

It changed the way I think about myself.

The Next Clue

One final contradiction remained.

If my brain constantly chased novelty...

Why did I often repeat the same mistakes?

Why did I keep making decisions I knew I would regret?

That question became another clue.

In the next article, we'll investigate impulsivity.

Not why people with ADHD fail to think.

Why they sometimes act before thinking has a chance to catch up.

Next

Part 11: Why Did I Do That? Understanding Impulsivity

References

Barkley, R. A. (2015). Attention-Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder: A Handbook for Diagnosis and Treatment (4th ed.). Guilford Press.

Brown, T. E. (2013). A New Understanding of ADHD in Children and Adults: Executive Function Impairments.Routledge.

Faraone, S. V., Banaschewski, T., Coghill, D., et al. (2021). The World Federation of ADHD International Consensus Statement: 208 Evidence-Based Conclusions About the Disorder. Neuroscience & Biobehavioral Reviews, 128, 789-818.

Hupfeld, K. E., Abagis, T. R., & Shah, P. (2019). Living "in the Zone": Hyperfocus in Adult ADHD. ADHD Attention Deficit and Hyperactivity Disorders, 11, 191-208.

Ashinoff, B. K., & Abu-Akel, A. (2021). Hyperfocus: The Forgotten Frontier of Attention. Psychological Research, 85, 1-19.