Your Total Is...$$$

Nowadays, everything is about money. The dollar sign honestly is a turn off. I’m much more turned on by a sign that says “FREE” in all caps and obnoxiously bold letters. Our entire lives are encompassed by the thought of money and how much something costs. It’s all consuming. Wouldn’t you be more willing to have a night out with the girls (or guys; whatever) if you knew you wouldn’t be spending an insane and unnecessary amount of money? I don’t know about you, but that freaking changes the game for me! Not having to pay for food, my alcohol addiction, Ubers, and extra charges from that one friend vomiting in said Uber. That’s the life I would like to live because when I find myself having to pay for these things, I ask myself, “Is it worth it?”. Is that $11.75 I spent on the bacon, egg, and cheese on an everything bagel worth it? Am I benefitting from this decision? My stomach is. Is my soul? Woah that was deep for absolutely no reason, but like y’all get it.

Worth. I suppose this all kinda ties into self worth in a way. Something, that I personally, have been struggling to grasp on to. There are a plethora of things that I indulge in that I feel like aren’t benefiting me, or make me better. I simply indulge because...well, I can. But, in the end, the things I do do not show how much I value myself. I love ME. I will say it loud and proud. I just don’t do things that highlight that. Basically, I’m talking about the men (screw that; the boys) that I get involved with. At 21, all I want to do is find someone who is worth it. I don’t have to fall in love and start thinking of the names of our three children, but I want someone who knows my worth as much as I am willing to see theirs.

That’s My Type, That’s My Type (yes, like the song) :

Can we talk about why commitment is so damn hard for you guys? Why is it that you can be so into me, and yet, you cannot by any means commit to me?! That just blows my mind! But….I love it. That’s what I’m attracted to. So, in reality it is my fault. STUPID!!! I deserve someone that will look at me and say with no shame, “I am so into you”. Instead I’m an idiot and I like the guys that kiss me in public, or hold my hand, or introduce me to all of their friends, but insist on ignoring any real feelings they have for me. Just admit to it damn it! I am awesome! We would be great together! Once you get your shit together, call me ;)

Say No To The Bar(tender) :

It just won’t work. Do not do it. I repeat; do not do it. I’m learning. This one is more for me, so sorry for this senseless rant. It’s just hard not to fall for the good looking guy behind the bar. I’m a sucker for a good personality. Sometimes it’s an act. Sometimes, if you’re lucky, it;s part of their nature. It’s an attractive quality, but they need the most help. Run. Far far away. I get wrapped up in it all. The long nights, the overwhelmingly exciting lifestyle, the drunken decisions, and the moments when they make you feel like you’re the only girl in the world. I should be! Well, other than your mother or sisters. I deserve nights of cuddling, and mornings made up of breakfast in bed, wanting to explore during the day, and tender forehead kisses that mean more than any makeout session. Not someone who probably finds a new girl every month. I am better than that. I deserve more than that. Get with it.

I AM PRICELESS!!! :

SCREAM IT FROM THE ROOFTOPS!!!! THERE IS NO AMOUNT OF MONEY OR MATERIAL THINGS THAT ARE WORTH LOSING YOURSELF IN THE FIGHT OF LOVING YOURSELF. YOU COME FIRST. FIND THE THINGS AND PEOPLE THAT MAKE YOU BETTER. NEVER SETTLE BECAUSE YOU DESERVE THE WHOLE DAMN WORLD BABY! That was for me and anyone else who needed to hear it…

So basically this rant was solely to prove to myself that I can come to terms with the mistakes I have made in regards to my worth as a human. Not all of this worth talk has to be related to the male gender. In many ways, this could relate to the workplace and social situations. For me, I find myself losing my worth in the dating world. It’s scary, but babes I’m trying to figure it out. This could be completely unrelatable to some of you. It’s Gucci. If you can take one thing away from this let it be this: “Money can’t buy me love or worth. It’s up to me to find it."