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Filthy haiku challenge


By Jazzy Published 2 months ago Updated 2 months ago 4 min read
Filthy haiku challenge
Photo by Dainis Graveris on Unsplash

I have been itching to try my hand at haiku again, but I wanted to make it sexy. So I challenge you, make a filthy haiku. Unleash your inner sexy God or Goddess and be divine. We are amazing humans with so much power in our bodies. I owe this revival to the book “Fuck Like A Goddess”, a great book for awakening that fire within. I think sometimes as women we forget just how sexy and amazing we can be. We just get lost in the every day and the rational and forget to let ourselves loose. I will read quite a few of these haikus on the podcast for a later episode as well! That is if you are okay with that! I'm very excited to read what people bring to the table!

For those who don't know a haiku is a form of poetry made of three lines. The first line is five syllables. The second line is seven syllables. The third line is five syllables.

Make sure to come and link them here. Let's get horny with poetry! 🔥

My two favorites will receive a $5 tip, and selections will be made Sept 30th.

In true Vocal fashion

1st Place- Hannah Moore

This particular set of haikus and commentary was so enjoyable and funny that I couldn't help but think Hannah would be a fun friend to drink with. Great haikus, sexy and sultry, not to mention hitting the 600-word lim was truly astounding!

2nd Place- S.A Crawford
This series of haikus used descriptive words that left me, well feeling like I watched a really well-thought-out rom-com with some soft porn (my favorite type of movie!)

And an added Value who will also receive a tip!

Paul Stewart

For this raunchy and playful addition.

Here is mine:

By Dainis Graveris on Unsplash

Caress my power

Lick from my toes to my lips

Panting and waiting


Bittersweet kisses

The taste of you on my tongue

Breathless for much more


Fuck me hard and deep

Bring my legs over my head

Call me a good girl


Call out my name, dear

Our pleasure reaching the end

We are one once more



And because there is always a word limit I will continue on about why I wanted to do this challenge. Not only am I a huge fan of haiku, but I'm a huge advocate for sexual health and wellness. I believe it's not something to shy away from. When I ask people the biggest secret to staying married, quite a few of them respond with sex. They say, we are super attracted to each other and want no one else. I really hope that's something that is true. If you need more inspiration for this challenge there is a podcast called “Dying for Sex” which is good and “Sex with Emily”.
Not to mention I have been rewatching “Outlander” for the one-thousandth time and there is quite a bit of sex scenes. There is almost nothing better than a Scottish accent. Well, except for a Brazilian accent, shout out to my Brazilian Husband! Anyway, I adore “Outlander” as a series so much. I think Jamie is a perfect character. The sex scenes are also amazing, the book doesn't go into as much detail but I like the show's take on it. I need to visit Scotland. I'm hoping to go to Ireland soon too, I loved “Leapyear” and it made me want to go. Irish accents are also pretty great. How would I rate those accents? Brazilian is obviously in first, followed closely by a Russian accent. I would love to go to Russia. Wow, this went off the rails! I have been noticing so many haikus again, and after someone kindly pointed out my syllable count was off I knew I needed redemption. Therefore, I wanted to make more haikus, and I finally found a syllable counter online. I have to say once you know how many syllables you have the writing becomes easier! Where would we be without technology? I have no idea. I can not believe I am not at six hundred words yet. I am close, and for that, I'm grateful as everyone reading this rambling is grateful.


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Comments (41)

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  • Thavien Yliaster2 months ago

    Ahhhh, my comment got deleted. It was probably too crude. Either way, I made this. Hope You enjoy it.

  • Real Poetic2 months ago

    Congratulations to the winners!! 🩵

  • Thavien Yliaster2 months ago

    Hey, Jazzy, I made this one yesterday. Still working on a larger atm.

  • Celia in Underland2 months ago


  • Brilliant choices! I completely forgot about this… I have so much to read and catch up on 😍 🥰

  • Hannah Moore2 months ago

    Woohoo! Thank you! And well done everyone else too! I'm so pleased!

  • Thavien Yliaster2 months ago

    Okay, I am going to have to go and read a few of these. I wonder what You rules for the competition was. Did You just want one haiku, or a list of haikus that told an erotic story? Haikus have a word limit typically ranging between 3-17, or 1 if You really wanna get creative, so I do wonder what kind of setup, climax, and payoff You'd be looking for with these? Also, this phrase, "When I ask people the biggest secret to staying married, quite a few of them respond with sex," is too true. When I was talking about sex and marriage with my parents they both used the phrase that "sex is the glue that holds the marriage together."

  • Paul Stewart2 months ago

    Well now, what a pleasant surprise. Thank you, Jazzy and well done to Hannah and S.A for their top placings and the other participants! This was a lot of fun!

  • Thavien Yliaster2 months ago

    Wait, there was a filthy haiku challenge? Goodness, I am out of the loop.

  • I wrote this when I woke up in the night, completely forgot to post it here! ❤️🕊️❤️

  • Joelle E🌙2 months ago

    I LOVE outlander!! Amazing challenge idea; I believe sexual health is so important as well 🔥

  • Andrew C McDonald2 months ago

    Here is the link to my contest haikus:

  • Berry Driven2 months ago

    Here's my entry. Hope it is right. It's my first time trying this style.

  • Andrew C McDonald2 months ago

    Not a haiku but one you may enjoy… Should have been called “I Must Have Her”

  • Andrew C McDonald2 months ago

    Wanton caresses Stroke me, lick me right twixt here As I spurt my love…

  • Berry Driven2 months ago

    My goodness. I don't know how you going to choose but look forward to hearing this podcast.

  • Paul Stewart2 months ago

    Love this idea and I've done one -

  • Lamar Wiggins2 months ago

    Here’s my entry to to add to the pile of filth. Fun challenge, Jazzy.

  • Hannah Moore2 months ago

    Nice work! My submission is here - I didnt process that it would need to be 600 words before I started, so it all got a little out of hand.

  • I always enjoy your ramblings! Your Haiku was so hot and steamy! I loved it!

  • Tiffany Gordon 2 months ago

    Great job Jazzy! This was a hot one! Fun fact: I'm partial to men with New York accents! lol I love the way they say coffee! 😁

  • Ashley Lima2 months ago

    Girl, this was so out of my comfort zone and it's not even that dirty xD Thanks for the challenge. It's good to branch out :)

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