why sex education is a joke

Listen, I know that sex is still a bit of a taboo topic anymore, and with the pandemic, I have found studies showing that my generation is actually having less sex. We are having less sex, less often and later in our lives. This in many cases is good, don’t get me wrong. However, in the world where we are often told to feel guilty about pleasure for pleasure’s sake, I find this concerning. I happen to love sex, in fact, the pandemic has only made me have more of it. I'm what is classified as hypersexual, as in I have sex more than twice a week. So when I found that people didn’t have the same reaction, I was shocked. I had made a bet that a bunch of babies would come from this, the pandemic baby boom. I was so wrong.

You’re reading this and you’re thinking, “so what?” Let me tell you, I think we have been conditioned to believe that wanting to have sex or even thinking about masturbating is wrong. I, mean, I know we have. It’s indoctrinated in us from religious beliefs to our sex education classes at school taught by the coach who definitely shouldn’t have taught sex education. There is not a day that goes by that I don’t either masturbate, have sex, or both. And learning about these acts was the hardest part, and I felt isolated in trying to learn. I grew up being told to be abstinent and was not talked to about masturbating in any way, that by doing so, I was making myself unclean. (which is a great thing to say to a girl with a crippling self-esteem issue in the first place.) By having these pleasures in the shadows I crawled my way through awkward conversations with my peers and the internet to learn about these very acts. This leads to misunderstandings and obviously guilt about even feeling curious about these things. How unfair! How dare we push this under the rug and act as if it isn’t happening!

That is why I propose bringing sex to the forefront of growing up and being an adult. It’s one of those things that we think about, and want, and mostly because of hormones. These hormones can’t be completely controlled and why should they? They are the most carnal of our desires and one of the everlasting primal instincts that have held with us. By making the conversation more about sex and its appeal I believe we can address the issues in society that we pretend is not happening. Teenagers having sex, or even young adults. Instead of preaching abstinence, we should arm our teens and adults with the information to have safer sex. Clearly, our methods are not working, as teenage pregnancy is still a thing, and STDs are still as rampant as ever. Not to mention, there are still so many people who don’t understand that you can’t get an STD from the bike seat at your skin class. So why not adjust what isn’t working?

By arming everyone with the information at a young age they can be more prepared to handle situations they may find themselves in. If we made contraceptives more available, we can have fewer STDs and unwanted pregnancies. By preaching abstinence and then not addressing the issues with that, we alienate the adults and teens that have sex and then have questions. I see it all the time in my practice. Young adults having sex and not knowing the basics, from using a condom to understanding the emotional ties. We need to stop keeping them in the dark. I know this is all mind-boggling ideas, however, tell me I’m wrong. Sex education in this country is clearly failing, and we need to fix it. That starts with us not tip-toeing around the subject and stepping up to talk to our teenagers and young adults about it.