Trish Marie Respalie
Sometimes I think maybe I’m not so strong. Sometimes it feels like everything is wrong. Why am I so naïve? Why's my heart always on my sleeve? I pick myself apart Like it’s a form of art. It’s no wonder I keep giving my all Only to shatter & fall. Maybe when push comes to shove I’m just impossible to love. I seem destined to be alone, True love never to be known. Maybe it’s for the best, If I lay my heart to rest. I don’t need the pain Of always drowning in the rain. I shall cage my heart behind a wall, Melt the key & build it tall. No one's getting in or out, Make sure no one sees me pout. Goodbye forever to my once future dream, I’ll be fine alone you’ll see.
Seems like it always comes back to you. But what am I doing here baby? Cuz you don’t want me either. I’ve learned to stand my ground,
Did it boost your ego, To cut me down? Did it make you feel good, To watch me drown? Did it make you feel smart, To make me feel dumb?
I find myself making excuses for you, But I know I can’t. I have to make myself see, You’ve finally shown the truth to me. You did it harsh and painful, Cutting like a knife, Before, in the end, Tossing me out of your life. But then I have to wonder, Was that really you? Was it that time after a few months, Where you showed your colors true? Or was this trauma triggers? I’ve been there myself; you see. I know how it can be. Are we a little bit the same? It doesn’t excuse the pain, But it might help explain. I always thought we were uniquely qualified together, But maybe I should be knowing better. Stuck between forcing myself to believe the worst, And trusting my feelings, Giving in to the urge to show patience & tolerance. I sit here in the distance, Pondering my feelings, And trying to keep busy. Honey, this is far from easy, But I’m a pro at pulling through, So I’ll just leave it up to you.
I keep hoping I’ll wake up from this awful dream How did we even get here? I tried so hard to stay in my lane But in the end, I still got pain. I don’t understand what happened. It all seems so surreal, A 180 out of nowhere. Were you ever even real? Your words just replay in my mind, Cutting deeper every time. I feel so betrayed, foolish, & hurt. I gave you my trust, my truth, & my love, And you used every bit of it against me. I thought it was okay to be honest with you, But you proved that wasn’t true. You Felt so familiar, And yeah, I didn’t know you long, And the little things, Most were still unknown. But I saw you… inside I saw you… But maybe it was only what you wanted me to see. Did you sense my eyes on your soul? Was everything I saw just a show? Did you just like the attention? Did I play into some scheme? Set up to demean me… Make me feel… Just so you could shame me? How is it I still care for you? How can I love you? You attacked me with your anger And became a perfect stranger.
You Felt Like Home
A restless tear-filled night Trying to ignore the pain, Seems quite fitting For the coming morning rain. I wish I could make it stop, Need to turn my feelings off. I could’ve sworn you were the one, My heart still feels it’s true, But with all you’ve said it must be done; I need to get over you. Right now I just want to be numb, Crawl in a hole, Away from the world. How could I be so dumb? I had faith in you & me, Because I feel it’s meant to be. I don’t want to go to sleep, For fear I’ll see you in my dreams. Now every time I think of you My heart aches & breaks. My eyes well up & tears fall I can’t hold them back at all. This hurts more then I’ve ever known, Because you, You felt like home.
Let's Cross the Line
I just want to be kissing you baby Cuddling in a blanket I dream of your arms around me baby Keeping me safe and warm…
Next To Me
I can feel you pulling away, And it’s not the first time. Part of me wants to run after you, Beg you not to be afraid.