So I'm writing this post for people who don't know what it's like being a survivor of sexual misconduct, but maybe knows someone who was a survivor. Sexual misconduct is an umbrella term for any act like rape and sexual assault. I will not pretend to know how everyone else handles sexual misconduct, I can only speak for myself and the stories I've heard.
We have all heard the saying 'prostitution is the oldest form of work', and whilst this statement is very true, society has always looked down on the men and women who engage in this particular line of work. And many still believe the misconception that the job is done out of desperation or because they were forced into it.
I was born in January 1989. At birth, I had two older sisters, and over the next seven years, I would gain a brother and two younger sisters. During my first five years, I lived in the suburbs of a large city. My mom homeschooled my siblings and me, and my family was very conservative and identified as fundamentalist Christians. At age 5, we moved to my paternal Grandparents' farm, where my cousins lived as well.
Today, I'm a woman who is embracing being a channel of Divine love and compassion. The power moving through me is born out of every moment I allow myself to love deeply and be loved. My life is unfolding into a romance beyond my wildest dreams. I'm celebrating a new chapter of creating impactful businesses with my dream partner. I'm honored to hold transformative containers for the women in my community. I'm connecting with the genius within me and attracting the collaborative genius of others. I'm passionately pursuing my purpose while being turned on by life's simple pleasures. Trust me, it wasn't always this way.
How many times have you been to a party or a small get-together where the topic of sex has come up? Seemingly innocent questions like “when did you lose your virginity” or “how old were you when you had sex for the first time?” can (and often do) land really hard for a sexual assault survivors.
We all want to believe that a rapist is an undeniable monster. A person who is so easy to pick out in the crowd for being an undeniable creep. They are that stranger in the dark alley or lurking in the bushes. Some despicable man with no semblance of soul or care for other human beings that lives to attack women because he couldn't be with a woman otherwise.
As a little girl, I was never allowed to wear “booty shorts,” glittery tops, v-necks, spaghetti strap tanks, you get the image. All of these things were deemed “trashy” or “too mature” for me at such a young and ripe age. My entire life I had been taught to fear my body, and fear bringing attention toward it. I didn’t want any male to be attracted to me for anything other than my personality, any other attraction was written off as "negative attention." Being the youngest and the only girl child in my family, I naturally began to rebel against these core values I was raised with.