Silence is welcomed when beckoned, right? When we want to study, read for leisure, or do homework, we extend an invitation to the silence. But when no one reaches out, and it still shows up, what do we do?
Where do we hide?
We hide behind the noise.
Because the presence of uninvited silence is the exact opposite of peace. Silence tends to be rather demanding. It'll ask you questions like, 'was it you?' 'did you do something wrong?' 'why didn't you speak up?' 'why was that so hard for you?' or 'have you done everything you could have done?' And when you refuse to answer, it's almost as if...the silence gets louder.
Yes. That's a thing.
But what does that mean, exactly? Think about it. Words that have been suppressed, do not often sit well in your chest, or stomach or wherever you carry your un-said words. Thoughts that never had the chance to transform into words, have a reputation of getting excited, and the most interesting thing about the mind, is that it will not store any 'potentials' for too long. It will not tolerate interferences with the 'thoughts-to-words-to actions' process for too long. With all of that being said, those suppressed words, and those restless thoughts work together to beckon the silence.
When the urge to hang out with friends falters, or when your common desires become not so common, the silence, unfortunately, is amplified, trying to respond to those pleas from your desperate mind. I know I keep saying this, but the mind is an interesting place. There are certain things that it will not tolerate. Here's what that means: you don't have much time to frolic with the noise.
Silence comes in many forms: Grief, anger, pain, depression, sadness, regret, hesitation...the list goes on, kids. Noise is so sweet when you think that silence cannot find you; You keep telling yourself that it'll transform you, and that there's no coming back from said transformation. Which is true, but why do we think that's bad? You'll tell yourself that with noise, you're in the eye of the storm and that nothing can get to you, but with being surrounded by the storm and inevitably being protected by the storm, comes the responsibility of keeping up with the storm.
Here's a friendly reminder: You are not the storm. You are human. You will get caught, you will get hurt. That grief will catch up to you, that anger will claw its way out of your chest and that hesitation will question you. So when the storm defeats you, you'll have no choice but to confront that eerie calm. You'll have to lick your wounds. You'll have to welcome the silence.
No one truly likes being or feeling forced to do anything, which is why we run. And with running comes the misconception that we're safe. We're protected from the discomfort; we're protected from what we think it'll feel like to step out of our comfort zone. Why do we do that? Why do we suppress parts of our character for the simple sake of staying in our comfort zone? Why do we ignore a chance to grow? Because we fear the unknown. And what does that have to do with anything? Well, silence does this thing where it makes you embrace the unknown. And that is such a strange concept to too many people.
My advice? Introduce yourself to who you are becoming. He or she has a lot to say, but you're not going to hear any of it in the noise you're hiding behind.