Coping with fibromyalgia

Recently I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia.

It feels weird to say it sometimes. I feel like I'm too young to be dealing with chronic pain, even though it's not new to me.

What started my journey was an increase in migraines. I'm on medication that I take daily to prevent my migraines, as well as a strong medication when an attack does happen to come through. But these migraines were different. They focused on the top of my head and radiated down the center of my body. I could even feel pain on the roof of my mouth and in my throat.

Those migraines sparked a month-long journey of conversations and tests between my neurologist and my primary care physician. Then I was asked if there was a history of fibromyalgia in my family. I said, "yes, my mother has it." When I told my mom, it was the first time she took any of my diagnoses seriously. She even ran her hands over a few pressure points to see if ours were similar (which they are).

Now that I know, a lot of questions I had about my health have been answered. I told my boss and my husband that I noticed my health declining since November, but I think it was due to an increase in stress because I took on three classes for my master's. Once the quarter was over, the migraines went away and I had less pain. When the quarter started up again in January, the spike in migraines happened again and that's when this whole journey started.

But then I began to look back on previous trips my husband and I took. We love road-tripping, and I used to be someone who could go to work the next day after driving in, no matter how late it was when we got in or if it was a 4-hour drive or a 12-hour drive. But on the past few road trips, I noticed myself having to call in to work the next day, or planning our drives around days I wasn't scheduled so I wouldn't have to take as many days off. I found myself in pain, waking up with migraines, and just physically exhausted. Now I know why.

It's taken a toll on my mental health, as much as I hate to admit it. I feel so down, depressed even, about the fact that I can't do as much as I used to. I try to be as active as I used to be, but then it catches up to me later, either that same day or the next day. For example, yesterday I took a walk in between my sessions. Not just a stroll, but a power walk. And when I got home after my last session, I found myself "deteriorating". I ended up falling asleep on the couch (something that is becoming a habit) and when I awoke, I had to call my husband for help because I couldn't will my body to get up. That's how much pain I was in. And as soon as I stood up, the room started spinning.

And as I write this, I'm having to take a few breaks because I feel myself spinning. Who knew vertigo was a side effect? It's the one I'm noticing more and my neurologist first thought it was related to my migraines, but now we know it's not.

I'm still trying to accept my diagnosis. I hate that I have to rest more, plan my days better, and can't work myself too much. I feel like I've become lazy. However, I'm learning the triggers of my flare-ups and what helps with the pain. I've refused fibromyalgia medication due to how I saw it affect my mom. I'd rather deal with it as naturally as possible before I absolutely need something. I'm already stuck with migraine and ADHD medications, I don't want to add something else to that cocktail just yet.

My therapist hasn't heard about this yet. But maybe next time I write about this, I'll be sharing the best natural remedies for fibromyalgia and the best techniques to cope (I'm already thinking about CBT).

I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia. Thanks, mom.