Are You Married to a Psychopath?

Jonathan Hinternish

Are you

Married

To a

Psychopath?

A memoir on the author's true events

And a helpful guide for you

"Hello, I'm Jonathan Hinternish. Author of this book, "Are You Married to a Psychopath?" In this book I wrote about my experiences, my horror, my deepest terror, my ordeals, in dealing with someone who takes things just a little too far.

Sometimes in our lives we run into that special someone in our lives who we think is going to be a great future roll model for our children, and even ourselves. But what if we are wrong? What if we are really in danger and don't even know it until it's too late?

That’s exactly what happened to me, and countless of others across the world. And I am writing this book to help give you a guide in seeing some of the things that I saw when I was married. Because I don't want you to make the same mistake I did. I was lucky to escape with my life after my marriage. A lot of others don't have that advantage. But I hope that with this book I can give you that advantage, that I can give you a survivors tool of surviving your marriage, or helping you see things for the way they might be. Tell Tale signs that might give you hints or clues that maybe it's time to pack your bags and seek out someone who will treat you better. Because sometimes, as I said before, some of us don't have a lucky second chance and our lives are cut short by tragedy that we never saw coming until it was too late.

I hope this book may help you, reader. And if you are in a bad situation, I hope this book helps you find a way out of it. Because no one deserves to be in a bad marriage."

Some people say that when they get married they are not taken back by what they are getting into in their lives. By a person's true nature. The nature of the narcissist. Hidden from view upon the first meeting usually is how the narcissist will hide his or her own true nature. A nature that is destructive, uncaring, selfish, and yes, above all, utter terror!

I was unaware of this when I thought that I had met the love of my life. Her name I will not mention here. But her actions, I will. What she did terrified me to no end. At no time did I hardly get sleep when I figured out how bad she really was. How creepy she could be, and what she was really hiding. Did I really even know this person? Or was this person hiding who she was underneath and not wanting me to see the real her that she was?

Do I regret marrying her? Would I be lying if I said yes? No, honestly I wouldn't. There are times that I wish on all the earth that I had never met her. Because in the long run it would have saved me years of pain and constant anguish over the constant bullshit that I had to deal with during the marriage, during the divorce, and after the divorce.

I can remember when I first met her. We had met on a online dating site called Plenty Of Fish. The site back then seemed promising, and I was looking to start a new life. I just didn't know how knew that I would be starting new. Or for that matter how bad things would get for me after we had met.

I had continued to see her after our first date. Everything seemed to be going okay. We had stayed at her house watching movies together, and enjoying each other's company. It seemed for us a match made in Heaven. We had not fought or argued, but sadly all of that would change on a March morning when I was getting ready for work.

I had spent the night at her house for the night, and I figured that I could leave in the morning before I had to go to work. As I was getting dressed I noticed that she came into the room with a very upset look on her face. I really was taken back as to why she would be upset with me for something that I was truly not sure of happening at the time. And honestly to this day I am still puzzled by what had happened. Because what happened next really there me for a loop.

She had come over to me and had a very upset look on her face, and I asked her what was wrong. Knowing that I had to go to work soon I stopped what I was doing and I asked her what was wrong. She balled up her fist on her left side, pulled back her arm, and took a swing at me right to my stomach!

I was knocked out of breath for a few seconds. Upset by her hitting me I went off to work, with a hurt stomach. I should have went to the doctor that morning, but my thought was on going to work and making money for the day. I didn't want to miss a day of work because I had just started my new job.

On my way to work I felt my stomach reel in pain from the slug of the hit. I could not believe how hard she had hit me! Why would she have hit me? What did I do to deserve getting hit this bad? All I knew was that me and her had to talk. She was either going to stop physically abusing me, or I was leaving! I wasn't going to take the constant abuse that she was giving me for no reason. I didn't deserve it. And if that's how she was going to treat me, then I sure didn't deserve her. I was not going to plan a future with a abusive person.

Time went by. We had talked about the issue of her hitting me after I went back to my parent's home and thought about what had happened. I was going to talk to her about it first before I made my decision if I was going to stay with her, or leave her. Back then after what had happened I was on the verge of leaving her. And that night it was up to her weather I was to stay with her or not.

That night we talked. She said that she was very sorry for hitting me, and that she would never do it again. She continued to tell me that she was not sure what really came over her. But she said that in the time that she was with me she grew to care for me, and that she would never mistreat me like that again.

I had went back with her. I should have left. A few days have went by after this and things seemed to go perfectly well. We were not fighting, and she seemed to be keeping her word. I felt like there were no problems between us anymore. I was wrong, again. This time she had gone all out to make sure probably that I would not come back.

I recall that I was relaxing on her bed just chilling minding my own business waiting for her to come back from work at the haunt. The next thing I know that woke me up was a very sharp pounding pain in my stomach again from my girlfriend making a fist, and slamming down as hard as she could right into my stomach forcing me to wake up, and scream in pain!

I got up, and I got in my car, going down the road and I recall I just didn't want to look back. She had lied to me again. What was with her? What did I do to deserve this much abuse? What I had done was, nothing at all. She was just abusive. And at this point I was just fed up. I was tired of being lied to, back stabbed, and abused in the way she was treating me. At this time, to me, enough was enough. It was time to break it off with her. And I should have. I should have just broke it off with her for safety sake. But again, I didn't. She managed to (Sweet Talk) me into coming back.

Why, oh why did I go back? My 25 year old ass should have just kept away from her. Oh how stupid I was….

At this time I was going to just call it off with her, which I should have. She had managed to call me a few days later, probably letting me cool off or something. But all the same, I was still mad about being punched in the stomach. I mean who would not be mad still about being punched in the stomach for a second time?

It took me awhile to calm down because I had already gave her a warning as to me not liking the fact of being a human punching bag. I knew if we were going to have a future together that things would have to change, and they would have to change fast with her. I was not going to take it anymore. I knew that I deserved a lot better than what I was getting from her already.

A few days went by again after that. I want to say maybe a week or two before we talked again. I was still upset with her when she emailed me. I really didn't want to talk with her because I was still upset, like I stated before. After we had chatted for a good long day I told her how I felt. And I know I took her back again, but I should have just tossed her to the curb, but foolishly I took her back again. And why? I to this day still feel foolish. But, after we talked, like I said, we managed to sort of work things out. Things again went okay after a long while with shockingly no problems. And I thought that all we were going through was going well. We were not fighting, we worked through our problems, and we were really thinking of our future together. We were actually thinking of starting a family.

We thought carefully on starting a family. It was not a overnight decision that we made lightly. We both knew that we had good jobs, and we actually already had a roof over our heads, and we felt that now we were ready to begin the next step, to start a family.

She called me over to the couch one night, and decided to ask me a very serious question. Was I honestly ready to start a family? It had been a life long dream to be a father. And I felt that now was a better time than any to begin our next journey. Parenthood.

We made plans that night to start trying. And I'm sorry I'm not going into the details of how we made our son. I'll let your imagination play that part. After a night that I will never, yet, sometimes do want to forget now or days, we had our child on the way. She had missed her time of Mother Nature making her house call, and she wanted me to go out and buy a Pregnancy Test. She took four of them. It turned out that she was pregnant. And then we knew that we had our son on the way. We were just not sure how we were going to break it to the family.

She was scared, as was I. What parent would not be scared the first time that they find out that they are going to be parents? A lot goes through your mind, you start thinking of what could go wrong, you think of what could go right. But in the end, something fills your mind that kind of calms you down. All parents go through this their first time. It's normal. It's the fear of life, and how life will play out.

To us, life was a test, and I know that's true for all parents. Life is a test, it tests you every day just to survive. And if life didn't test you to the best of it's ability, then life would not be life, would it? That's what we thought. And I know that she was scared. And I didn't blame her. But I assured her that it was okay to be afraid, and that I was afraid too. And that no matter what happened that I would always be with her, no matter what. And that I would do my best to make sure that things went okay.

Time went by after our big surprise. And we both loved each other unconditionally. It seemed like nothing would be able to come between us. We ended up moving to Lansing, Michigan to try to start a new life after our trailer that we had just moved into had a lot of problems, especially with the water system. The landlord said that the trailer was ready to move into, but he lied like hell. We moved out and didn't look back.

Unfortunately living in Lansing didn't last long. There were a lot of problems living there. But we knew that we were destined for something better. We ended up moving back to Flint, Michigan. We didn't want to, but we felt that we had to. After what had happened we didn't think going back to Lansing, Michigan would have been the best idea. We ended up staying with my parents because we didn't know where else to stay. I knew that our son was about due to come into the world. And I didn't know what else to do. I didn't think that we would make it in time in case he arrived early or somehow late. We didn't quite know what to expect, being first time parents.

We found a doctor in time and was able to bring our child into the world on January 12th, 2013. And it only took him 25 minutes to come into the world. I would never forget that moment. That was the best day of my life. As we waited for a new job to come in I was getting despite for one. I looked around all over Flint, Michigan, but places were closing and shutting down. Even the Temp Agencies were closing down. I had placed applications in to Temp Agencies and they had closed their doors without notice. But we made it through.

I can't say that things at home were going okay. My wife was getting into arguments with my father on a occasional basis. And I wasn't really sure about who was starting the fight. I managed to talk to dad when we went for a beer one day and talked man to man. He said to me that my wife was the one starting the fights. And one day I caught her starting one of the fights which made more sense when I caught her in the act. Dad was telling me the truth. I can remember my father telling her that she could leave, and me and the child can stay. He didn't want her in the home, and I didn't blame him after what I had seen and heard.

I heard something coming from my wife that I was not expecting. She told my dad to fuck off! I mean really! You tell your husband's dad to fuck off! I knew that I had to check it out. She was holding my son and acting like my dad had done something wrong. But I was wise to her. Dad had told me what had happened and I believed my dad. I knew how my wife was and I was wise to what she was doing. I told my dad it was okay, to take it easy and calm down that it would be okay. And it was. I had a long talk with my wife and I told her that if she kept up the attitude that she would be out on the streets or going back to live with her parents seeing as how she was being very disrespectful to mine. She said that she would take our son with her. But I knew her nature, and how she was. She wouldn't even change his diapers even when I was there! I told her that I would keep him here, and that he was better off living with me. After all since he was born I was the one to change his diapers, feed him, clothe him, give him baths, and take care of him. I was more of a parent than she was. All she would do was sit on the bed watching her computer, and doing basically nothing at all. And then claiming that she was the best parent in the world. I had never seen or heard more narcissistic tone than what I heard from her in my life!

After we had our little argument she called her parents and wanted to know if she could come home. I was thinking by then that maybe it was best. After all she had been abusive towards me in the beginning, and now she was taking it out on my parents. And I knew that if our son went with her that she would abuse him too. It was only a matter of time before that would happen. And I wasn't going to see that happen!

Later that night she also did something that I was not expecting her to do. Something that was kind of freaking me out and I wondered what I had gotten into after we got married! She started asking me if it was okay if she was to take a job elsewhere, and asked me if I was okay with it being a long ways away from home. I was wondering why. Because we were both looking for a job at the time I honestly didn't think anything of it. But as she went on she was starting to make sense of what she was trying to do.

She was trying to tell me that she didn't want to be married to me! That she wanted a divorce. But she wasn't fully coming out with it the way that someone would expect. The next thing came as a shock to me. She asked me if I was comfortable with her seeing other women! I mean really! Other women? What the hell? I didn't know how to answer back to that! I asked her if she was happy being married to me, and me being a guy I started to wonder. Her answer was yes that she was happy being married to me. But there was something in me that was wondering.

Then when her parents called and wanted to talk to her she made me look like the bad guy. She told me to tell them that she was sleeping and that she would call them back later. Her entire family was getting mad at me after a while and saying that I was keeping them from her. Which I wasn't. She was making me do things that I didn't want to do. So, one day when they called I told them that she was honestly awake and that they could talk to her. I handed her the phone, and she asked me what I was doing handing her the phone with her family being on the other end of the line. I can't say she was happy with me after that, but honestly I didn't care. I was tired of being the bad guy in her family's eyes all because she wanted me to cover for her for no real reason. I still feel bad to this day. I mean it's family. Who would want to hide from their family? I wouldn't!

After that she was yelling at me for days wondering what the heck I was doing handing her the phone. She told me time and time again that she didn't want to talk to her family that she wanted to be left alone. And I asked her why. Why was she turning on her family for? I wouldn't be turning on my family! Somehow she had changed after our child was born. She was getting into fights with my family, and causing me to become a enemy with her family. Why? Why would she want that? I felt like she was using my family as a scapegoat to get away from her family for some odd reason. She was changing right before my eyes from the person that I married. I felt like I was losing my wife. She was changing into someone I didn't know.

The time that had finally come for us to move to Kentucky seemed like a promising one. It felt as though Flint, Michigan wasn't doing anything for us. And we had to make the journey to a new place to live. I felt as though we were doing the right thing. And I hoped that we were doing the right thing. From what my family was saying in Kentucky that things were going to be okay. And I hoped they were.

We packed up our things and headed for Kentucky taking a Pensky Truck. One which I will never ride in again. Those things bounce all over the place when your riding, and they don't feel well on the road. My brother however drove that truck and we both said the same thing. That the Pensky truck sucked. I can't say that I blamed him on saying that because I was thinking that myself.

Once we made it down to Kentucky taking I-75 to I-65 all the way down to Highway 101 to Adolphus Kentucky past Scottsville we finally made it to our destination in one piece. Somehow we had a okay trip. And I'm glad we did. I just hoped that things were going to go okay once we got down there. I only hoped that they would.

We stayed for a while at my sister's place but decided to move into a place of our own after a while. I'm kind of glad that we did. But somehow I felt that it would be something I would regret. And to this day I kind of do regret it. But in all, I think that what was about to happen, did happen for a reason. One that I could not control.

Do I regret moving into the new place? Yes. Would I change what I had done? Yes. But what's done is done. Do I miss the old home in Michigan? Yes! Very much so! I would buy the place back if I could! But things happened the way they did. I can't help that. Maybe it's for the best? Maybe things do happen for a reason? In all, what happened, happened. And I can't change that.

Once we moved down to Kentucky, and decided to move into a new place we managed to go to Low Income Housing in Scottsville. It was kind of in a bad neighborhood. Something I didn't like, but then again we felt that we had no choice. Once in our new apartment things were bare. We barely had anything that we could have taken with us.

But we had our beds, and we had our hope. The landlord was nice and allowed us a minimum rent due to the gas it would take to get her back and forth to work since my wife had already found a job in Bowling Green, Kentucky.

She was due to work the next day and I was to take her to work at 6:00am. We got ready, and headed off to work. She said that everything was going fine, and that she was due to get paid that weekend. I told her that we could lay some money back for rent, pay the electric bill, then use some of the money for clothes and things that we need, then save back whatever was left over. It was always good to have a rainy day fund in case something bad were to happen. She agreed.

That weekend she got paid I immediately went food shopping, paid the electric, and then we went clothes shopping and bought us all some clothes that we had been needing. We were doing okay. And still having food stamps after making some adjustments helped too. We may have been under the stairs but we were doing okay. We kind of felt like a little Harry Potter Family, or the movie horror flick, "The People under The Stairs". All and all we were happy, we felt as though things would be okay. But sometimes feelings can be false…

A couple of days had went by, and by this time my wife said that she was doing okay at her job. Things were going well from what she said. And things could not have been better! We also had a friend of the family come over to visit from time to time. She seemed odd, but friendly at the same time. We didn't see anything wrong with her, and we allowed her to stay the night as a (get to know) sort of night. Her and her child seemed to get along great with our child. So things kind of worked out good for us all.

Our son was getting use to his new surroundings which was good. And everything seemed to be coming up great. Our son wasn't in school yet and we had time to kind of chill and relax. As we got to know the new neighbor I was confronted by the Landlord and told oddly to beware of the new neighbor, that she was going to be trouble for us. Like he was delivering a warning. In the long run I wish I would have listened more. Because she was trouble. And the Landlord we had was delivering a helpful warning to us. How bad things were about to get for us because of this one person? really bad.

The few days that went by after that were kind of mild, but I was noticing a small change here and there by my wife. She was acting rather odd at times. I would tell her I loved her, but she would say, "Yeah, you too". Then it went from saying I love you to "Yeah…". Like she was trying her best to stay distant. I wasn't sure why. Something was off. She also kept talking about the new neighbor a lot. Like she was fascinated by her or something. I kind of had a gut feeling that something was up. But I couldn't put my finger on it. At times I could hear them laughing together, and from what I thought I heard was kissing. Kissing? Really? Did I hear that right? I would sometimes think to myself as I kept hearing more and more about this new female neighbor from my wife's mouth. I was really starting to believe that she was having something going on with the neighbor. The more time went on, day by day, things started to make more sense.

One day as I was taking out the trash, I shouted to my wife from down below that I loved her as she went into her new mistress's apartment, before I had walked back into our apartment. All she could do was roll her eyes back and forth to what I was saying. I felt like I was being mentally and physically pushed out of her life. Like I didn't matter anymore. She would spend more time in Apartment 40 at the neighbors then she would in the house of ours. I mostly had Apartment 33 to myself! It was that dead quiet!

I took the trash out again and she came down the stairs and said that she wanted to talk to me. I was wondering about what. Had I done something wrong?

My wife had said that it hurt the neighbor's feelings when I called her honey, sweety, babe, things like that. I was wondering why. Why would it hurt the neighbors feelings? That's what I asked her next. It was like she was going out with the neighbor, and she admitted to me that she was. She had been seeing the new neighbor for some time. She said that there was something more that she wanted to talk to me about that night, but it would have to wait until night time. I agreed, mad, but I agreed.

Night time came, my soon to be ex-wife came to the bedroom, didn't even bother to undress and kicked me out the room forcing me to sleep in the storage closet! She said to me through the door that she was tired of me, and that she wanted to get a divorce.

So, here I was in the storage closet with a pillow and sleeping bag wondering what the hell just happened! A divorce? What the hell? This was my house! Here I am doing everything under the sun for this family, for her, and this is how I'm treated? No way!

I went out the door and knocked as loud as I could to get her attention. I wanted her to know that I was pissed off. Understandably so!

She answered the door and looked as though she didn't even care that I was pissed, nor did she care about what I had to say! I didn't care at that point. I just wanted to know why. Why the neighbor from Apartment 40?

She looked at me, sighed, and she shut the door in my face and went to bed. I was even more pissed off. I could not believe what I was hearing, or seeing! What the hell had I done to deserve being treated like this? The thing I never did was nothing to deserve what was happening to me. To this day I still feel as though I was done wrong because of what had happened next.

What had happened next was the fact that I had to go to work, and I was not sure if I should have went to work because of the fact that my wife wanted me to go to work very badly for some reason. Even I kept thinking all day that I should call in. I went with my gut feeling. I called into work. I made it a mission to find out more what was going on.

I laid on the couch that night and wondered why all the time I was up here in the apartment and she was never coming home. She had told me a lie several months prior to what was going on now that our neighbor had broken her arm due to a skating accident, and it would take time for her to heal up. I thought it was fair because she would not have been able to do much, so my wife would help her out. That was how she came to starting her relationship, from what I could guess.

As I laid there thinking of what may have been going on, and why she was making all the excuses in the world not to come home, and always telling me that it would take time for her to come home and I would have to wait longer for her to come home. I figured as much that something was up, and what I found out that night was more shocking than I could think of. They had formed a relationship, and my wife did not want to come home, at all! She wanted me gone.

My wife had told me that she wanted me gone, through a text message! A text message! Who the hell would tell a person that they wanted them gone though a text message? After that I had enough. I started making plans to find another place to live. But, I had a second thought about moving. Not about my marriage, but about my son. I would not leave my son for nothing, or no one.

I told her that I was staying. And that I would not leave. I was staying for our son. She got mad, very mad. A few days went by, she came down to the house one day because she said that she forgot something that our son needed. I cannot believe I bought it until this day. She said that she was having to leave soon for some reason. I asked her if she had a planned appointment that she had to go to. When she told me no, I got curious as to why she was leaving. And above all, where she was going. She would not tell me where she was going, but that she had to go.

The next day was not very kind to me. The next day felt like something out of a horror movie, and I felt like I could not wake up at all! I was just getting up around 6:00am. I was just making coffee to get ready for the day.

I heard my cell phone ring. It was our former neighbor that my wife had been seeing. We had to move to another side of the apartment complex because the apartment complex was being remodeled, and mostly everyone was having to be moved around, those that were on the bottom level.

When I got the phone call our former neighbor told me that if my wife was there that I was to let my wife know that next time she leaves her house to lock the door and make sure that she locks the door behind her. I told her that I would the next time that I see her.

The neighbor said to me over the phone, "The next time you see her?" She was kind of taken back a bit by the fact that my wife had not been at the house. I asked her if she was with the neighbor, and the neighbor said that she would not have been asking me that if she was not with her at that time. I stopped and thought for a second that maybe we should investigate it further. I told her that I would be at her apartment. She said okay, and we were going to get to the end of where my wife had went. It didn't occur to me at the time that my wife had taken our son with her.

I got to our neighbors apartment, as we entered in, we saw that the house was ransacked. My wife and my son was gone! Where could they have gone? I asked our neighbor if she may have said something to her from the night before of where she would have went. Our neighbor said that she didn't say anything to her and that she didn't know where she was.

All of her clothes were gone, my son's toys were gone, everything she had for us, was gone! But how could she have left, taken everything with her, and not been able to be followed? It occurred to me very quickly that she had help. But from where?

I remembered at the time that she had gotten a letter from CPS about abused women and that they could help. Kentucky was passing them out to everyone as a helpful note back then. But what could she have done? And where could she have gone? She wasn't abused at all, so why send her that letter? Something wasn't adding up.

I went to CPS to find out more to see if they might know where she went. They told me that they honestly didn't know. And the situation to them was odd. I knew that I was not going to get a response out of them because they honestly didn't know anything. I thought I would continue looking around town.

I continued my search. I eventually had to wait several weeks before I got a answer as to where she was. Our neighbor said that she had met a friend, and asked if I would like to meet this friend. She knew I was still upset over what had happened, so to try to cheer myself up I said I would go with her to meet her friend. She said that this friend of hers was in her apartment on the phone, on speaker phone.

As I made it inside the apartment I heard a very familiar voice over the phone. It was my wife! What the hell? She said hi to me, and I immediately started to wonder where she was.

My wife said that she was in Michigan, in Lansing. And that she and our son was okay. I asked her why she left, and she said because she had to. I was still puzzled. She wasn't telling me anything straight forward. As I waited for a direct answer my wife and our neighbor started to talk to each other over the phone. But not in the way neighbors would talk to each other. More of the way that two lovers would talk to each other! I was just thinking to myself that she should just come home, because if she didn't we were going to lose our home! As my wife was head of household! I told her that she should return home. And just as I told her that, my wife and our neighbor started to talk about her coming home. I still was wondering what was going on. Nothing made sense!

A few days passed and my wife came home. She still would not tell me why she came home, but I had a pretty good idea. I was pretty mad at her still when she came home. And I wondered why she left in the first place. Nothing was making sense at that time.

A few months went by and she would come and go inside our house as she pleased, but I was not sure what she was doing as she would come in when I was resting. I could hear her come in. But I would not be caring why, as I was still mad at her for what she had done. I kept thinking, "Why would she run off to Michigan and not say a word to me?" Plus take our son with her? I had more questions in my head than answers. I just didn't know where to turn to. All I knew at that time is that she wanted a divorce, and that she was hell bent on the divorce. I however always had a funny feeling that something was wrong. But I could not put my finger on it to save my life.

I found it was kind of weird that my soon to be ex-wife would be going places more with our former neighbor. More than usual when I looked down at the exit of the apartment complex whenever I heard the truck go by. You could not mistaken that loud engine.

A couple of more days past. By this time it was April 12th. My soon to be wife was getting tired of me by this point and must have really wanted me gone. Because the next thing I knew she was about to go off on me in a really big way.

She pushed me aside one day in the apartment complex, looked me right in the eye, and she confessed to me that she loved the woman that she had been seeing, and that she wanted me gone. She even claimed that she didn't care if she would have to kill me to get rid of me. And if that's what she had to do then that's what she would do, from what she told me in her own words. It horrified me.

That night I went to a friend's house to visit and get away from all the crap that was going on. I got a call the next morning on my phone from our neighbor saying that police had shown up, and that I had to come home right away because they wanted to talk with me as well for some reason.

By the time I got home the police were hell bent on arresting me! What have I done? Arrest me? There was not a arrest warrant for me as far as I knew. And why arrest me? From what the police officer told me who I had spoken with before they took me off to jail was that my wife had filed a restraining order against me!

I was blown away! I knew that she wanted a divorce, but a restraining order? What the hell? It was a entire new ball game for me. It was like she had stabbed me in the back, and not even cared. I was forced to leave after I had spent the night in a cell wondering why the hell that this had happened to me.

I remember that the food was not bad. I got sandals out of it, they were free, I even got to keep them after my arrest. But the one thing that I hated was the fact that the cell was constantly cold. I was wrapped up in a blanket just to keep warm. There was a small bed, a toilet, and a shower. So at least I could take a shower.

I remember being handcuffed while I was sitting in the cell. I remember the handcuffs going around my wrists. I was never arrested before in my life. Why was this happening to me now? I was never issued a piece of paper or anything, so why was I being arrested? Deep down I knew why. It was because my wife wanted me gone, and it was clear that my wife would do anything possible to get rid of me, kill me and leave me for dead somewhere, or do worse, arrest me and force me to lose my job, my home, and worse, my son.

My son… The one living being that was keeping me sane through this entire divorce, and now a restraining order? How was I going to last the remaining five months that this restraining order was going to last? I could not even go anywhere near my son. If I did, I would have been arrested again. In this time I had no idea what was going on with my son. How he was doing, or if he was okay.

There were times that I would break down crying at night because I thought that I would never see my son again. And as for my job, I got lucky thanks to the judge. The judge let me go, with no prejudice. And in the end I got to keep my job. I was happy. Not a lot of people in Kentucky would get to keep their job after what I had been through.

The crap that I had been through during my trial and tribulation with my ex-wife filling out a restraining order was very damning. She falsified a restraining order in another state. She purposefully claimed that she wanted me gone. She got in contact with me before my arrest gloating that she wanted me gone. She didn't even care if she had to kill me. But then she said that death would be too good for me. She had other plans for me, and I was no good to her dead. She wanted alimony, child support, Cash Assistance, and Food Stamps. She also wanted to take our son for herself. And she wanted me to lose my job and suffer in life. She didn't care how bad I had to suffer. She just wanted to watch me burn as bad as I could.

My next thought that I married a monster. Only a monster would talk like that, that I knew of. It scared me that she was talking that way. And she called me several times on the phone trying to get my attention for this? What was her deal? It's like she had a fixation on me or something. She wanted to see me suffer!

At the count date I told the judge what she had said. The judge said that she had no right to do that. And I was thankful for that. I felt that I was saved because the fact that all the false allegations that had happened were false. She had done nothing to back anything up, because, in the long run the truth had come out. Nothing had happened to her. That was why she made false statements. The only reason why she made false statements was because like I said before, she wanted to see me burn. She wanted me to suffer. And she didn't care how she did it. She wanted me gone, yes. But she wanted me to suffer, she was making that very clear. And I honestly didn't know what to do until I sat down and thought about how I could defend myself.

The judge felt sorry for me in my situation from what I remember, but I told her that I was okay. That I would get through this. That I know I will see my son again because I am going to let faith play a part in my life. I am going to stay as calm as I can to make sure that things will be okay. I just had to have faith, and stay strong.

During the time that I stayed with my parents while the restraining order was going on, I felt as though I had no way of keeping my mind off of what was going on besides going for a drive, playing video games, working on my books and writing, just something to try to keep my mind busy. I could still not believe what had happened. I just remember thinking constantly of why I deserved what had happened to me.

I felt as though I was being thrown under the bus, she was backing up over me and running me over again. I didn't know what to do. I felt so helpless for the first time in my life. All that I wanted was my freedom back. My son back. That's all I wanted. And most of all, I never wanted to deal with her again for as long as I lived. But I knew that for some reason I would have to. We were about to go to court to finalize the divorce. But I knew one thing. I would have to face her again. And I would have to tell what had happened. I had to relive what had happened. The problem I had was, could I?

I remember when the divorce was finalized in September of 2016. I was relieved, but at the same time sad. We had to have joint custody. But I knew where that was going to go. It was only a matter of time before she would find some way to leave and skip out on being a parent.

I had told the judge that I was afraid that she might have been a flight risk, because of what she did before, going to Michigan and doing the restraining order the way that she did. The judge did agree with me on that. But she was to be closely watched.

I can remember that one day she called me up as I was getting my son on the bus for school. She said that if it was okay with me if she could change the directions of the rule of the courts. I told her that I was not comfortable with that. She went ahead and told me anyways, and it wasn't like a question. It was more of a demand.

She stated that she demanded that I get 6 months of visitation, and that she get 6 months. I was not dumb to her ways of working around things. I knew that she had to be up to something. I immediately called my son's school and spoke with the principle about the situation, and he agreed with me that she was up to something.

I went to my computer and went online and looked up the situation that she stated. In the state of Kentucky it is unlawful for a parent to change anything on a court ruling at will, and after 6 months of Child Abandonment it is customary to terminate a parents rights if the child is abandoned for 6 months. Knowing this, I finally knew what she had planned. I knew that I was several steps ahead of her.

After that happened it was some time that I had heard from her, about four years by now. But what she did next was something I would not expect. Something that I knew she had done. And it was obvious that it was her.

After not hearing from her for so long I was surprised to get a knock on my door from Child Protective Services. The questions they asked me was about the same conversation that me and my ex-wife had a few years back. It sounded like the same pattern of her verbal tone.

I finally figured out who they were talking about, and it didn't surprise me, but they said that the allegation against me was a false one. It didn't surprise me as I said before, but I know they said that they would deal with her. And I'm glad they did.

Why would she make a false allegation after no contact for so long? She had already abandoned my son. What was she to gain again from a false allegation? She was making no sense! And for not hearing from her for so long why would I want to deal with her again? All she was to me was trouble. CPS agreed, and they told me that they were not going to do anything to me because it was a false allegation, which I was glad. But I had them relay a message to her. I was tired of dealing with her crap. And I didn't care where she was or how she was doing, and still don't. As far as I am concerned all she is, pure trouble.

If you ask me, no man should have to go through what I went through years ago. If there was ever a description that I could think of, I know Hell would not describe what I went through. It was a fate worse than Hell. The feeling of being alone through the entire time. Not knowing who to turn to. The emptiness that followed every day after the divorce. I never felt a feeling like it. It was like the world had stopped and I had no choice but to suffer in silence as I felt my heart being ripped out of my chest due to my wife wanting a divorce.

I can also remember how my ex-wife was acting before the divorce. She said she wanted a divorce several weeks prior to these events. She would have countless personalities it would seem. Even I was taken back by them. She would talk in tongues, call herself other names, and never make any sense. So I really didn't know who I was talking to every time I tried to talk to her. I was more puzzled than anything!

That brings up another event that happened to me and my fiancé after we had helped her out. My ex-wife had called us saying that she was going to get kicked out of the house where she was living, and she only had until January 1rst to find another place, and get out of the house where she was. I told her that she could stay with me for 14 days and that should be enough time to get herself another place. Now, not many ex-husbands would do this for their ex-wives. But me, I have a heart. And then again, I really wish I didn't. Because as it turned out that she took advantage of me right from there.

She had been talking with the same woman that had kicked her out right from the start of her temporarily moving in with me to find herself a home! How could she be doing this? I was cleaning my son's room one day, and I found her phone laying on the hallway floor while she was out. I could not help but be a little nosy because I knew how she was. But as I looked at her phone I noticed that she had been talking to the same person, so the secret was out anyways. I was going to let her tell me, I wasn't going to let anything slip that I knew. Apparently from what she told me that her and this woman had split, and that she didn't want anything to do with her. I knew I should have kept my guard up for a reason. And I'm glad that I did. The next thing I was doing was reading the text messages. From what they said was too juicy, and too despising to keep reading.

Apparently she was sick and tired of me helping her out, and that she was told by the woman that she was going to meet her down at the Minit-Mart that was just down the road from me. And the time stamp said today's date! I was fed up! I could not believe I was being talked down about behind my back after helping her out of a bad situation! Not because we have a son together, but because I have a good heart! She backstabbed me again! I was going to wait for her to come home and see what she says about her little run around. I wasn't going to downplay it anymore with her. I was going to let her tell me what was really going on. Because I had enough. I had helped her, and she had used me. I don't usually look at people's messages, but in this case I'm glad that I did. It made me realize that she could not be trusted at all. She was nothing but a pathological liar.

As she got back she said that she got paid that day, and I said okay. She said that she wanted to go get some pizza. I hadn't said anything yet that I had known what was really going on. We went out to get the pizza. As she was making the payment with her card, her card said it was declined, not enough funds. She was puzzled as to why. I didn't blame her. But she started to get really upset after awhile.

She said that she wanted to go to another ATM to get the cash off the card. I took her to another ATM and she didn't get her money then either. We went to another one. By this time she started to kick the machine! I ordered her to get back into the car. I told her to forget about the pizza, that I would cook dinner. She was fussing and fuming all the way home.

When I stopped the car she got out and slammed the door hard as she could! Then she went upstairs and slammed the door as hard as she could and screamed! I was terrified!

The next night I took her to work. She had called me wanting me to come and pick her up from work. I told her that I would be there in a minute and that I was just now leaving the house getting ready to get in the car and come get her. The next thing she did was tell me:

"Jon! If you are not here in five minutes I will fucking kill you! Do you hear me? I will fucking kill you!"

I didn't really know what to think after that. I was speechless! I went to go pick her up. But on the way home I didn't say a word to her. I didn't want to. I felt that I was being treated wrong, and that for her to put a death threat against me that fast was telling me it was time for her to go.

I had talked to my landlord the next day and my landlord agreed. She said that it was time for her to go. My landlord backed me in my decision. I'm glad I had a good landlord back then to back me on the decision. I wasn't going to place my son in such danger with a dangerous woman. And there was no way her behavior was going to bring harm to my son. I ordered her out of the house. I told her that our son has to stay here, and that he was better off here, and she had to go.

She looked at me, gave me a dirty look, and punched me in the stomach as hard as she could before she left. I got up, and managed to see her waiting for her ride at the Minit-Mart. And wouldn't you know it. It was the same woman t hat had kicked her out of the house. I promised myself after that I would never believe her again. Because all she was going to do was lie to me.

Have you ever wondered what life is like when you stop breathing? It kind of sucks because your entire life flashes before your eyes and you think that it will be your last time on earth because your wife, (keep in mind this is before the divorce), is on top of you after saying that she wants to make love with you that night, and ends up choking you with a wooden broom handle.

Well, that happened to me. It began one night on September 25th of 2015. My wife, now keep in mind that this is before the divorce. My wife wanted to make love that night. She was very insistent on making love for some reason, and she waited until the neighbor had all the kids so we would have the night alone.

As we made love, I could feel her slowing down. My eyes were closed, and suddenly before I knew it I was being choked with a broom handle! She was trying to kill me! I remember I tried to lift the broom handle off my neck but it was of no use, she was overpowering me, using her bodily weight to pin me down and choke me to the point of where I almost blacked out. I knew she didn't like this kind of love making, and that this was not her! I had to do something really quick or she would kill me! Her eyes were pitch black like she was being possessed by something, or someone. I didn't have much time to determine which one.

I quickly rolled over as best I could to get her off of me. I made it to the door of the room and quickly went out shutting the door behind me and locking it. Luckily the door locked from the outside instead of the inside. All I can say is I am still thankful to this day that whoever put the door in failed at their job. It saved my life.

Since then I slept on the living room floor. I didn't care to go back into that room. After she had calmed down and came out she didn't even look at me, she just left the house, and thankfully never came back. I was too afraid for my life and since she stayed at the neighbor's place a lot I felt safe as I could feel back then. After that incident I'm thankful that the divorce came when it did. However being arrested like I said before was not good, but like my mom says a lot of times, things happen for a reason. There is always a reason. My reason for going through the divorce is to end up where I am now. And that life has gotten much better since she's been gone for four years now.

What is she up to now? I'm not sure, and nor do I care. After all she's the one that threatened my life on so many occasions. And speaking of that I can recall another occasion that I know your not going to believe, but it happened.

One day I woke up and it was about 8:00am. I got a phone call from a unknown phone number that was contacting my cell phone. I answered it, and I wish that I hadn't. It was my ex-wife. Now when I got this phone call it was right before she skipped town for four years. But this is where I got some sense into her I think. But seeing as how she called CPS on me with another false allegation again I don't think I got through to her enough.

When she called me she was using someone else's number to call me. She had left two voicemails on my phone threatening to kill me if she did not see our son again soon. Keep in mind that she had already seen our son the prior weekend, so I was thinking maybe she was going off her rocker.

When she called me she threatened me as I said before, and I was really shocked by the two voicemails that she had left me. I was wondering what gave her the right to give me two threatening voicemails when I had done nothing to her, again!

Right before I could hang up she called me back sobbing and crying saying that she was sorry. I was in immediate shock and thinking to myself that I had to put my foot down. I was not going to take death threats over the phone through voicemail too well. And I shouldn't. I mean it's a matter of protecting me and my family!

I told her that if she tried it again that I would call the police and she would be removed from seeing our son again for the rest of her life! I was not going to take being threatened over the phone anymore. She had been threatening me too much.

She began to scream at me as loud as she could and she said that if she saw me again she would come in my home, slit my throat, and leave me for dead. I had to step up, and I did!

I told her that if she came over here threatening in any way I would defend ourselves. I was tired of being threatened and I told her I would call the police before she could get over here to make sure she could be taken away to jail. I had to do something.

She ended up calming down after a while and I told her:

"Look where you are. Look where you have put yourself. I tried to help you when you asked for it and what did you do? You treated me like crap and you lied to me. Then after that you start calling me at 8:00am making death threats? What did I do to deserve this? And think about this for a minute, every time you threaten me, you threaten my son! Our son! Our son is doing great, and he's doing much better without you in his life, and I'm not going to sugar coat it! He doesn't even remember you! He doesn't even know your name! Do you know why? Because you have refused to be in his life for so long that he has blocked you out of his mind! He has cast you out of his life!"

She could do nothing but cry, and in the end say that I was right. I was in shock that she would admit that I was right. After all that time.

But I hate to admit it. I was right. I was right and making some good points to her and she said that she had to go. She hung up the phone and I didn't hear from her again for four years.

Within those four years after standing up to her me and my family have been doing well. We have been able to cope with what had happened, and move on from there. And I'm glad. I'm very glad. Because in the long run we need no drama at all.

I can remember when I got out of jail, and I remember having a phone call with my biological father about the situation. The conversation lasted for hours it seemed. He was shocked when I got out of jail. His rig stopped to a grinding halt and he asked me what was going on. I asked him if he had a moment, and he said for me to wait for him to pull over. And I waited.

When we finally got started with our conversation this is how it went. In this conversation I will put my dad as (BF) for Biological Father. And me as (J). To help protect identities.

Conversation:

BF: "Hold on, let me put back on my head set."

J: "Okay, your on."

BF: "Okay, that's alright man."

J: "Okay."

BF: "So, do you remember when I called you, and ah, I sent you that text and I told you to call me?"

J: "Yep."

BF: "Okay. Well that's when she was up to my place, and I told you where they were. I told you this remember? Well, she was telling me all this shit that ah, well, I don't know if I should tell you that part or not, but, ah, well what she was doing was telling me that you raped her, beat her, and you were being mean to your son and not giving your son any food, and all that shit."

BF: "Okay. Well, we were all sitting there and we all watched her, (myself, and the family), and she didn't act like anyone that had been touched the wrong way. And she said that you were the one that did it. And she said that she was sexually abused.

J: "Your kind of crackling a bit. Okay, I hear you now."

BF: "All she did while she was at my place was sit on the couch with, ah, what would you call that? Skype? Or whatever it is there where you look at each other on the phone. And that's all that she would do. She never took care of your son! She never changed his diapers! We were doing everything!

And she didn't feed him! When she got up to eat she got herself some food and not your son!

J: "Damn!"

BF: "And she never got your son any food! So, (we) went ahead and fed your son, and let him have his own bowl. Then when she came into the room your son would clam up tighter than a clam. He would stop eating and everything. And not only that, but your son would sit up at the table by the window and she would put her arms over his shoulders, and have him like you would have someone in a headlock, you know? And she would force feed him!

And that's when we all looked at her and told her to leave him alone. And she got very upset with us about it. We told her to leave the boy alone, he is going to eat when he feels like eating. You don't need to force a spoon in his mouth!

Your son doesn't look like the kind of child that has ever went without food."

J: "No."

BF: "Because pretty much every kid I've ever known that was freaking hungry, or had food taken away from them they would always be chowing down what was put in front of them. Any kind of food you put in front of a child the child grabs and goes. You know, I mean that child will know when to eat. I mean hell, I even fed my grandkids. But we are going to catch her in a shit load of lies and bull. And that's why I wanted to get a hold of you. Because the allegations she was making against you, they are prison time.

I mean rape and all that is prison time for the rest of your life. It does not go away, it doesn't blow away like dust in the wind. It stays on your record for the rest of your life! It's a felony that can destroy your life forever!

I should know, I have a relative that's locked up for it! And it's just wrong what she's doing. I wanted to know what was going on. And you know, we were asking her ("Well, if this happened than why didn't you call the police?")

And she says ("No"),

And came up with all these fucked up answers:

("Well, no, I didn't want to, and it wasn't this, and it wasn't that").

Then I go:

("Okay, well…")

Then she told us that you were abusing your son. And we were like "Okay? Why didn't you call the police?".

And she came off with:

("No, I didn't want to.")

Then I said:

("Well, if my son is doing all this shit to you why didn't you do any kind of reports? Do you have any bruises on you? Bruises on your arms? Your face? Your back? Anything? Do you have like a rape kit from a hospital?").

And she says:

("Oh no, no, I didn't want to do any of that.")

Then I was like "Okay, this bitch is lying").

J: "Hell I know she's lying!"

BF: "Well, son. I never did think that you did. Honestly dude, I thought about it, and I thought about it, and I thought about it! And I have to admit that she had me going for a little while. And I'm thinking ("What is he thinking?". "Why is he doing this?". Because I'm pretty sure he did not grow up in a violent house hold. And my son I did not fully believe what was going on. But I kind of had to figure it out for myself. Because I'm pretty sure you were not raised in that environment."

J: "No I wasn't."

BF: Because I know you were raised in a decent environment, you were. And with what she was telling me, everything she was saying didn't come together.

But like before I asked her:

"Why didn't you call the police?"

"Why didn't you take pictures of the claims your making? You know, some kind of evidence. Some kind of paper trail?".

And she kept saying:

"No, No, No."

And I was thinking:

"If a woman is abused like she is claiming, then a woman is going to say something."

J: "Right."

BF: "And it's like she's been telling me about the sexual abuse thing. She said it's been going on for years. She said it started over in Flint, Michigan then progressed to Kentucky. And she said to me that it got worse when you guys got to Kentucky. And she still ain't saying nothing to law enforcement or anyone. And at that point we started realizing "Hey man look at the way she's talking to this other woman on the phone. I mean they are saying things that, well, you know, how two women should not be talking to each other.

And their conversation was progressing worse, and worse, and worse, and while she was on the phone she was on the phone so damn long she was plugging the phone into the wall! And still was talking on the phone to this woman, from the time she got up, to the time she went to bed!"

J: "She wasn't watching after my son?"

BF: No! All she would do was talk on that phone, son! So we would spend time with him and take him places. We took him to McDonald's. And he was happy. But any time he saw his mother he would clam up and his demeanor would change. And at that point we put two and two together. And we all said that she was not right.

After getting caught in so many of her lies, she said she wanted to go back to Kentucky. So, I told your sister Alysha to send her back over there to Kentucky and get this bitch out of my house. And son, I'm telling you now you need to get a hold of somebody and get your son away from her! And whomever she is talking to in Kentucky, and staying with in Kentucky, that place is a pig pen! You need to call CPS on her because that place is just filthy, son. It was the most disgusting house I had ever seen. That house is horrible!

J: "I know me and her were staying in separate apartments at the time. I was at my apartment, but I didn't know how bad it was where she was in the other apartment. And where did she get the Restraining Order?

BF: "Well, the only place in Lansing, Michigan that you can get a Restraining Order is in Probate Court, on Kalamazoo Street. But from what I understand whomever you file a EPO on has to be served with that EPO before that order goes into effect.

J: "I was never served."

BF: "Right, so you were never served so that EPO is not in effect."

J: "The arresting officer even asked me if I had been served papers and asked me where they were. And I thought he was talking about the divorce papers at the time. I showed him the divorce papers. And he says "Where are your Restraining Order Papers?".

Dad, I was never served anything! Her butt should have been sent to jail! Not mine! I mean she has threatened to kill me countless times! Where is the justice for me and my son in all of this mess? She has also claimed that she wanted me gone so she can hook up with this woman that she's been seeing! And she's said to me that if she had to kill me she would!"

BF: "Well, you HAVE to be served! In order for the EPO to be in effect, and that means served by paper! You were never served so you should not have been arrested. The cops have to send you the paper!"

J: "Right."

BF: "Well, I honestly can say that if you were not served, then I know you were not served because I know if you got a restraining order in the mail you would have called me and told me."

J: "Yeah, you know I would."

BF: "You know what, it is my personal opinion, and I'm not a psychiatrist but that woman is fucking nuts! And that is my all personal opinion! She is crazy!

And I have seen little kids act like your son. And those kids were in bad situations. And I seen that in your son, I really did when he was around her. This child has been abused by her, dude. Just by the way he acted I could tell.

And when you go to court, you ask for a court appointed attorney. Because man I know you’re a victim in all of this! As well as your son! You two are a couple of victims of your wife!

And you know what, I just thought of something. When she decided to go back to Kentucky she broke her own Restraining Order. She should be arrested. And I can remember when she was down here, she said she wanted full custody and you would not get to see your son ever again.

Well, you need to plead Not Guilty. Because you are not guilty of shit! I even don't believe anything that she told me now. Nor will I ever believe her. The lying bitch needs to rot in prison the rest of her life! And about this person she's seeing, I don’t know fully what's going on but I do know by the way they talk to each other your wife wants to be with this woman, and I know your wife is not smart enough to pull all this off on her own. I know this woman she's seeing has to be backing her up.

And your wife apparently has no guts or balls until the woman she's seeing comes to back her up. I've seen it, son. And she doesn't care how she will end up with this person. She wants to be with her. And she doesn't care how that happens. I would be watching your back son and get your son as soon as you can. Do not trust your wife!

J: "Well, I changed my number so she can't contact me. And she keeps changing her number anyways, so…"

BF: "Well, son, I have to go, my phone is about to die. I love you son. Let me know how they court date goes.

J: "Okay dad. I love you too. Bye.

On another note, I kept journals of incidents that happened between me and my now ex-wife. Just in case something was to happen. I made sure to keep everything. And I kept everything for a reason.

When my ex-wife stayed with me and got rid of all the court evidence and threw it in the trash as I was told that she did when she told me. I was shocked. I was in complete shock! Everything that I had been storing up to help my case of getting my son was out in the trash. She had found it! Now what was I going to do? I let her stay with me only for a short time because she needed a place to crash for 14 days until she could find another place. But she got rid of all the evidence that I had to help get my son back and set things right. Or so she thought.

I went ahead and made sure that I made copies of the evidence. Knowing she might do something stupid and tamper with court evidence was just too promising because I knew her. Any way to get me and my life destroyed she would take it. When she told me that she destroyed the evidence I did keep calm about it, but I made sure to show I was surprised. After all she didn't want to be found out of what she was actually up to. And from what I had on her was enough to put her in prison the rest of her life. It's a good thing I always have a backup plan.

I wasted no time. I put the copies where I knew she would be expecting them to be. Just as I figured. After she left my apartment I checked the spots where I hid the copies. She did just as I thought she would. She was trying to destroy any evidence that I had on her so she would not be found out, so she could not go to prison. She was trying to cover her own ass by tricking me into letting her stay with me for a short time. That's all she needed!

I know the last time I saw her would not be that day. I had a feeling. Because what came next was a shocker! It was August-13th-2017, I had received a phone text from the woman that she was seeing. She told me to come and get my son. She said that her and my now ex-wife were splitting up and that I was to get my child immediately. I hurried to where they were staying and picked up my child.

When I got to where they were staying the woman that my wife had been seeing pulled out really quick in her Chevrolet Blazer and sped out into the street as quickly as she could. I wasn't sure how bad the fight was, but my guess it was pretty bad. Once I had my son with me, my ex-wife would then send me a text every day non-stop it seemed with the words, "Jon, I will fucking kill you!" I wasn't sure if she was having a bad day or if she was having a mental breakdown. Those are also her famous words to say for some reason, even to this day I still don't know.

It's now November, and things are not going quite as well as I had hoped. Another journal entry:

November-12th-2017: 04:01AM

It's a late night. I'm having a hard time going to sleep. A lot of fear is running through my mind with what the woman who my wife is seeing, and my wife keeps talking about. I am so sick of her trying to force me to give up my rights as my son's father because she wants a damn sex change operation! That's all she talks about, my wife, is a damn sex change operation! And now she's being called Damien by her supposed spouse? What's next? Good grief!

I faced a lot when I was dealing with her. More than I should have. I even kept track of all the death threats, date and timed when she did them, how much she said, and more. This is the list of the death threats that she gave to me before the divorce was finalized.

DEATH THREAT #ONE:

Face to Face.

12-30-2015.

6:50PM.

"I will fucking kill you, Jon!"

DEATH THREAT #TWO:

Face to Face.

03-18-2016.

04:16PM

"Jon! I swear I will fucking kill you!"

DEATH THREAT #THREE:

Face to Face.

03-20-2016.

05:18PM

"Jon! I want you dead! I HATE YOU!"

DEATH THREAT #FOUR:

Face to Face.

1-19-2017.

10:00PM.

I received this one over the phone when I had to go pick her up from her job one night:

"Jon, if your not here in five minutes I will fucking kill you!"

DEATH THREAT #FIVE:

Face to Face.

8-13-2017.

5:00PM.

"I will get what's mine, Jon! Whatever it takes!"

I then went on to write these side notes:

"Keeping my door to the house locked at all times! NOT SAFE!"

"GOD, HELP PROTECT ME, AND MY FAMILY. - AMEN!"

Those times for me were the hardest I think. Because I never knew what was going to happen next. I had already been shoved under the bus. What was next? As far as I was concerned as long as those two were together, I was a target, nothing more. And in danger. And that went for my son and my family as well. I can remember the one time she could not get to me, so she tried to get to my family. She failed….

If you think that was nuts, your in for a treat for the next one! This one caught me by surprise when I was still married to her, and it still freaks me the hell out to this day! Now, my ex-wife is not right in the head. That much is clear. But how bad? Your about to find out!

Now, my ex-wife was in Foster Care growing up, and didn't have much of a easy life growing up from what she had told me when I was married to her. Now, keep in mind none of this came out to me until after I had married her. And even after knowing all of this, I wish I hadn't married her. She became more of a nightmare from one of my nightmarish books it would seem after I found out how she really is. And let me tell you, just telling you this. Being able to type this out to you is still giving me the chills until this day!

It all started one day when my ex-wife told me that she had been in foster care, as I stated before. She told me that she was in the custody of a woman named Vicky. I'm not sure of Vicky's last name, but I do know that she was in the military. Not sure what branch. Vicky was attacked two times by my ex-wife while my ex-wife was with her in Foster Care. Here is how she got attacked from what my ex-wife had stated to me.

My ex-wife had said to me that one night she was down in the kitchen, and she had a plan to get back at Vicky for being mean to her. She said that Vicky had placed vinegar in her food making her lose weight. She was tired of going hungry, and she was going to do something about it. One night while in the kitchen, my ex-wife took a knife and tried to slash vicky's throat! She nearly succeeded!

Vicky from there took her to the psych ward to have her locked up for a while to learn a lesson. My ex-wife didn't learn her lesson. Now where she was locked up was a hospital in Flint, Michigan from what she said was Hurley Medical Center's top floor psych ward. She got out the first time on good behavior, and went right back to Vicky.

The second time she went into Hurley's psych ward was for the same situation, and she got out on the same situation. She said that she shared a cell bathroom with a woman while she was there. Her and this woman would "experiment" while the guards thought that they were asleep. She told me that she had made a friend that time while she was in there. And that she was bi-sexual. I knew my guard should be raised then because of the way she was kind of talking as time went on while she was telling me all these things.

What really freaks me out even worse is her telling me the stories of the people that she had been with. The next one is really going to freak you out! If knife slashing wasn't enough, the next one I was not ready for myself!

The next one she told me was that she had this boyfriend that had cheated on her. She got so pissed off that cops had to be called and he had to be taken to the hospital because of what she had done to him. She told me that she had blacked out and that she had taken a novelty pencil, one of those huge novelty pencils, and placed both his hands on a wood surface, and thereby slamming the novelty pencil right through both of his hands! He had to have surgery to repair both of his now lost hands due to what she had done. I asked her if she got in trouble for what she had done, and she said no. That the boy's mother sided with her. I was wondering how the hell the boy's mother would side with her after what she had done. I mean I know he cheated on her. But still! Slamming a novelty pencil through both hands causing someone to not have his hands anymore and laughing about it? That sounded really sick to me!

I immediately wondered what I had gotten myself into. Was I in danger? My biggest fear was….YES! Who had I married? Was it the woman I fell in love with? Or was it someone else?

I have dealt with a lot of things in my life. A lot of stress, as you can see from this book. And it comes to no surprise as to what I bring to you next. It is something that I wish I could lock away in a box and put away forever. But I promised to help those in need who went through something like this. So, here I am sharing this with you in hopes that this may help you understand what your probably dealing with and how bad it may get, and know that your not alone in the world when dealing with this kind of situation.

This next thing I bring to you is the text message that me and my ex-wife had the day of November-5th-2016. Our son is age 3. And thankfully at this time he didn't understand what was going on. Because his biological mother had already placed us through enough Hell. More than what we needed. Sadly we didn't know that there would be more to come. But, this is the conversation as of November-5th-2016. Take a look:

EX-WIFE: "Hey."

ME: "Hey."

EX-WIFE: "Why are you asking me how good our son is doing in school on a fucking Saturday?"

ME: "Just wondering how he's doing in school."

EX-WIFE: "I don't know but that's a weird thing to ask on a Saturday, he has no school! (laughs despicably). You know what I mean? I can understand asking something like that on a school day, but you threw me for a loop there, you know what I mean?"

ME: "Yeah…"

EX-WIFE: "He's…(sigh's), he's a good boy sometimes, but he does start getting irritable and scratching the teacher's eyes, and biting and shit like that."

ME: "Really?"

EX-WIFE: "Mm, Hmm."

ME: "Oh Jeez…."

EX-WIFE: "Yeah…"

EX-WIFE: "Last uh.. uh…. This Thursday, I'm pretty sure it was Thursday. I had.. I.. I.. got called not long after I dropped him off at school."

ME: "Okay?"

EX-WIFE: "I got called by the school saying that he was biting, clawing, cussing, scratching, kicking."

ME: "Really?"

EX-WIFE: "Mmm Hmm."

EX-WIFE: "I mean scratching so hard that he was breaking the skin, Jon!"

ME: "Wow!"

EX-WIFE: "I'm use to seeing this kind of behavior from him though, because he does this to me often."

ME: "Really?"

EX-WIFE: "He will yank at my hair. He will bite me, he will scratch me.

ME: "Jeez…."

EX-WIFE: "He will punch me! He will punch the shit out of me every chance that he can get!

EX-WIFE: "And he will try to be a little terror one second, and then turn around the next second. But I'm just a perfect little angel to him. I mean he loves me!

I was speechless by this point…. I just didn't know how to respond. I knew really what was going on. I was just in shock that I had never had this kind of trouble with him, but she was? What was really going on? I asked her if I could maybe talk to him. When I tried to place her on speaker phone I could hear it flip over to speaker phone once I called her like she was trying to stop it from going to speaker phone. But I could swear for a moment that I heard my son screaming in the background.

EX-WIFE: "Yeah…."

EX-WIFE: "But I'm not giving up! He's my baby boy. No matter what he does, he is my baby boy! I don't know how he acts with you. I'm just telling you how he acts for me."

ME: "He doesn't act like that over here. I've never been bit, or had any of that happen to me. I wonder why it's happening with you, and not me?"

EX-WIFE: "I don't do anything but parent him. You know what I mean, Jon? Right? I'm just doing the normal parenting stuff…"

ME: "How do you parent him?"

EX-WIFE: "I tell him no when he does something bad. Or no when he can't have something. And all of a sudden he just starts punching!"

ME: "Wow! He never did that towards me when he was here.

EX-WIFE: "He seems to be overly aggressive towards women!"

ME: "Really?"

EX-WIFE: "MM HMM! His teachers are women and they are getting the same. Any women of authority and he acts this way!"

ME: "Mm hmm. Mmm hmm.."

EX-WIFE: "So yeah, I had to sit up there with him until he could calm down."

ME: "Really?"

EX-WIFE: "YEAH! YOU FUCKING IDIOT!"

You would think that with everything I was going through with this woman that I would have been going nuts, right? You would not be mistaken. You see, when dealing with this insane piece of garbage that I know she is, I always tried to block her out by thinking of pleasant things. Things that would not bother me in such a way.

And it did work for some time. However, I had a feeling that all was not going to be silent for long. The more she kept aggressing her anger towards me the more that I felt that we were in danger. And we were.

My ex-wife is narcissistic, bipolar, and schizophrenic. And I know this for a fact. And yes, it scares me to know that she's like this. She's proven herself to be unstable, a flight risk, and mentally a danger to society.

If a person threatens to kill you many times, wishes you dead for no reason, wants to get from you what you have worked for all your life, and decides to go after your family once she can't get to you. That's how I was thinking she might have been. What scared me was, I was right!

Maybe this will help you probably understand the person your with of whom you may be having issues with:

Schizophrenia is a serious mental disorder in which people interpret reality abnormally. Schizophrenia may result in some combination of hallucinations, delusions, and extremely disordered thinking and behavior that impairs daily functioning, and can be disabling.

 Bipolar disorder (formerly called manic-depressive illness or manic depression) is a mental disorder that causes unusual shifts in mood.

Dissociative identity disorder (previously known as multiple personality disorder) is thought to be a complex psychological condition that is likely caused by many factors, including severe trauma during early childhood (usually extreme, repetitive physical, sexual, or emotional abuse).

With everything that my ex-wife had told me of the time when we were married of what was going on I could barely believe her. She stated to me that she had a really fucked up childhood, that her parents were working jobs, mainly her mother was working three jobs, just to take care of three kids. Her father would work for the United States Marine Corp. as a software engineer. And she would be having a blast with her siblings doing things that most siblings would do.

But what she told me next I think is what honestly really began her path to where she is today. And in a way I don't blame her for how she is today. Most people that went through what she did would have ended up this way.

She told me that her parents use to fight. Sometimes to the point of blood. It was really upsetting and heart breaking to watch. Sometimes her, and her siblings felt like they didn't have a family. They felt like they just had each other. At least that's what I was told.

And I know I covered this subject before in the earlier chapters about CPS coming to my door. Well, I found a journal entry which I thought that I would share with you. I thought that since it's relevant to this book I would add it in.

VISIT FROM CPS, (Child Protective Services):

June-25th-2019.

5:30PM.

"I received a front door visit from Child Protective Services. Thankfully it was not a bad visit. They informed me that someone had made a false allegation back in April against me. From the questions I was being asked I was able to deduce who it was that had made the call against me. Everything pointed to my Ex-Wife. It was of no surprise….

Back in the beginning of May the person that my ex-wife had been seeing who she had later married said to me that she was going to divorce her. The accuser asked if my son had epilepsy. Asked who his doctor was. And some of the things that me and my Ex-Wife had talked about in the past had suddenly resurfaced again through the questions being asked to me by CPS. How odd? Huh? Not to me. How stupid could she be? Did she really think I would not know it was her?".

HERE IS A JOURNAL ENTRY THAT I HAVE FOUND. IT HAS NO DATE ON IT, BUT IT WAS LOGGED IN ONE OF MY JOURNALS' AS A VOICEMAIL FROM MY EX-WIFE:

EX-WIFE: "Hey Jon, just making sure that this phone works just like the rest of them. I'm sure you got my text? Yeah? I want you to know that I'm in a much better job now, but I'm not going to go into any fucking details! But yeah, Jon. I am offering you thirty dollars. Yes, Jon! Thirty Dollars! In Cash! Every time you bring him to see me. And I am paying you to bring him to me! Just thought I would give you a heads up."

I never thought that she would start bribing me, but there you have it! She did! My Ex-Wife had seen our son on numerous times. But she still sends bribes to me, and death threats. She makes it a habit. And now, both me and my son are terrified of her.

JOURNAL ENTRY FROM WHEN I WAS THROWN OUT OF THE HOUSE ON JULY-8TH-2015.

Dear Journal, July-8th-2015. 9:00PM.

"My wife has finally lost her mind! She threw me out of the house! All I have is my Pontiac Aztec, and a little supply of food. I'm penniless and I may have to camp out for a few days until I can find a place to live!

The woman she is seeing and has been with for a while now has my son. I can't even get in to see him, or to take him with me to my parent's place for safety. My wife has threatened me saying that if I did not leave tonight she would have me arrested. And she said she would even falsely put down a police report to make it happen. She didn't care how she kicked me out. She just wanted me gone! I don't know what I did to deserve this! What the hell?

I keep wondering how my son is doing. I hope he is okay. What did I do wrong? All I did earlier was come home from a job interview with Dollar General, and now this? Good grief! I guess all I can do tonight, is camp out in the car. I'll talk to the Landlord come morning.

Of the most inhuman things she has ever done to me. I thought that was the worst. I was wrong….

I can recall from reading this journal entry like it was yesterday of what had happened at the apartment that we stayed in a long time ago. I felt so torn, so down, I never could feel as low as I did back then. It was something that I never thought that I would have to ever deal with again. But yet, here it is. The journal entry that haunts my dreams, gives me nightmares to no end. And is the essence of my tortured soul."

In the time that followed nothing was worse than what I had experienced the day that I started getting notes on my door. Notes that I didn't see coming. Panthlets, Papers, Medical Advice Papers. All were at my door with a hand written note. The reason for this? To let the apartment complex know that I once had Hepatitis-C. I no longer am infected with it. I am cured. But it's a experience I will never forget.

In the letter it stated:

"To whom it may concern:

This person has Hepatitis-C and is highly contagious. Avoid at all costs. Sorry Jon, it had to be done. Your too risky to be around.

- The Ex-Wife."

I immediately took them down and went right to the landlord. The landlord said that she should not have done that, and she was not at the right to do that in the first place. That was discrimination towards a tenant, and harassment. I told the landlord that I no longer had Hepatitis-C, and that I am cured. Which I am. My Hepatitis infection had not come back in years. So no worries there. But for her to use it against me was rather a low thing to do.

I remember the papers that were hanging on the door. I had stacks of papers. The door was covered with them! There was no way in the world that the apartment complex would not know about it. I got looks from everyone. I felt so ashamed, embarrassed, I didn't know what to do. I went into my bedroom into the apartment and stayed there for the rest of the day and night making sure not to come out keeping the door locked and shut as best I could. I even put a note on the door that said "Do Not Disturb." I really was at a cross roads with my Ex-wife that I just wanted to break down and cry. How could she treat me like this? Why was I being treated like this? Does she really want me out of her life that bad?

I got so depressed that I started to eat, cry, and wish I was dead. I didn't want to keep living like this. Like I was some sort of diseased animal that was roaming the earth. That's how she was treating me and I didn't like it. It's not like I asked to be diagnosed with Hepatitis-C. I was born in the 80's and people back then didn't test blood for Hepatitis-C. Therefore there was always a chance that someone could get Hepatitis-C through blood transmission of operations, or intravenous drips.

I hurt so bad that I could not bring it to words. I just curled up in my bed under my comforter and cried while watching The Crow on DVD. I felt like I had no friend in the world down here in Kentucky. My wife, the one that I trusted, loved, and I thought supported me, was working against me to make sure that I didn't have a life. Was she the one that made my life a living Hell before we moved down here? Was she the one that got me hurt at work the night of The Haunt at St. Lucifer's Haunted Asylum when I got my arm bashed in by a morgue door? Me and her were the only ones that knew each other's facebook passwords, and for a reason. It was all starting to make sense. She did want me out of the way. She would do anything to either see me gone, or see me dead. No wonder she was always saying her nice little catch phrase: "Jon, I will fucking kill you!"

I made a journal entry that night of the events that had happened that day….

Dear Journal, June-30th-2015 10:09PM

"Will I ever be normal again? I fear that the exact word "Normal" is replaced by "Post-Hepatitis-C infected individual". As of late it seems that all that anyone will ever see is a man who had Hepatitis-C, and was cured, treated, but is somehow even after the treatment worked, is somehow felt as being a threat. And will never again have his humanity back, but be seen as a walking disease.

I know that I am cured, and the medicine did what it was suppose to do. But somehow I get the feeling that even after treatment, my life will never be the same as it was before. If al that I am ever going to have are constant reminders of my past I would rather be dead! I am a human being damnit! Why can't I be treated as one? Is it because I had Hepatitis-C? And if so, will I ever be able to get my humanity back? I don't think so. And why is that? Because people are too afraid of what I had before, and more concerned about what they might catch from what I had.

I never asked for Hepatitis-C! But I guess it's a price I have to pay. I will never again be seen as a human being. Only as a disease that walks the earth…."

- Jonathan Hinternish

I have been through my fair share of Hell. Hell would not even describe how things have went for me during the time of my marriage. I felt as though the entire world had stopped. That since I knew no one down here that I didn't have anybody that I could trust. Thankfully I still had my pride. At least I had that.

If there is ever a fate worse than Hell, I told myself. I had found it. To me, what I was going through with the divorce was a fate worse than death. A fate worse than Hell. It was something that I had wished that I just didn't exist at all. But, somehow I knew that I would survive. Even though at the moment it was a dark time period for me.

I also want to take you back to earlier, it's about a journal entry that I had recently found while looking through one of the old journals' that I kept at the time during the divorce process. There was a habit that I would always have, and that was to keep a journal about every situation. This journal entry that I kept was of the day I read the restraining order once I managed to get my copy of it (after my arrest) from my lawyer's office.

Dear Journal, May-11th-2016. 6:00PM.

"Upon reading the copy of my Restraining Order, it turns out that my ex-wife had called about a Restraining Order against me on the day of February-12th-2016, and didn't tell me what was going on. She had also called my father and lied to him.

She told him that I was beating her, raping her, molesting her, and that she got kicked out of the house by me, so my father went and picked her up. It was something that took my father three days to figure out that she was lying her ass off to him. And all the time that she was up in Michigan she was on the phone a lot, and my father thought that she was on the phone all the time in the state of Michigan, talking with the girl that she cheated on me with back in Scottsville, Kentucky.

But it turned out that she was on the phone with the judge too on top of all that getting a Restraining Order set up against me. I should have known that there was something going on. I had a feeling that there was. I should have listened to my gut and got out of the house while I had the chance. Because her lying her ass off like she did was too odd even for her. And my father was right, she could not pull off a Restraining Order all on her own."

Well, come to find out after reading more of it I found the name she used as a Eye Witness through all of it. And come to find out it was the same woman that she cheated on me with that she had placed her name down on the paper so I guess it would get passed through in Michigan so she would have something to use against me. And it made perfect sense as well. Why else would she come back? She wanted to come back not only for the woman that she cheated on me with, but to act like she had done nothing wrong and she would have me arrested, thereby I would be taken out of the home and out of her hair. Easy clean up for her.

She got what she wanted in the long run. She got me out of the house. She got me out of her life. She got rid of more than just me. She got rid of the trust I had for her. She got rid of the love I had for her. Will I ever trust her again? The answer to that is no. Why? Because it's simple…. She cannot be trusted.

If she was to stab me in the back the way she did, what is to stop her from doing it again as much as she wants. If she doesn't get her way, she could do it to someone else. She's sly, tricky, cunning, backstabbing, deceiving, and all around evil. There is no changing her. She is the way she is by choice. That's all that there is to it.

And if I would have known that she wanted a relationship with another woman I would have left a while back. Hell, I wouldn’t even have had a kid with her, or married her. But it's kind of funny how you tend to find out more after you marry someone. The secrets all seem to come out. The real person always seems to come out. And sometimes it's good, and sometimes it's not. It's all how the person will present themselves. In this case she wasn't honest with me from the beginning. And that is what did our relationship in. Not talking about problems either is also what did our relationship in. And I wish that we would have talked more. But alas that would never be.

I am doing okay now or days. Some of the nightmares have subsided. But not all. I tend to have constant thoughts during the day of what had happened during my marriage. Kind of Post Traumatic Marriage Disorder, if you could put it that way. But I deal with it every day the best way I can. Sadly, sometimes when I'm asleep I often hear her voice saying in her own voice:

"Jon! I will fucking kill you!"

Then I'll wake up. And she won't be there. Sometimes talking about her will bring back memories, smells, touches, certain triggers will make me remember certain things of what she did. Especially the touch of a wooden broom handle. I will never forget that one.

I've thought about seeking help. But I know what they would do. And no amount of medicine would make me forget what had happened. It's just something that I have to deal with on my own day by day. And each day things seem to be getting better, as better as they can be.

Sometimes I wish that me and her had never met. But then again I wouldn't have my son. I guess we all have to go through the bad to get to the good. And that's said for a lot of us. I guess it's our own crucible to go through in life. A kind of trial.

People always asked me if I was okay. I would lie and say that I was. But deep down I wasn't. I was scared from what had happened. But like I said, I'm dealing with it in my own way, like anyone else would be doing. It's not easy, but I manage. It's my own burden to bare.

Sometimes in life we all have our challenges. And I think that the divorce for me was my biggest challenge. I thought that becoming a father would be the biggest challenge, but I was wrong about that. So wrong. But in a way I'm kind of glad that I was. Not only did it make me face what was wrong in my life, but it also made me a much stronger person in all.

They say that people grow over time, and I think that in a way it made me grow to the point that I could see anything, and kind of handle things that came my way that I could not handle before. I guess the old saying is true. That what doesn't kill you only does make you stronger.

I look back at everything that had happened. From the time that me and my ex-wife first met on our first date, to the first time that we kissed. To the first important choice we made about getting a place of our own. To working towards a goal of conceiving our son.

I felt as though back then that everything was finally going right. I had found the woman of my dreams. Even though we had fought a little, but I figured "What couple doesn't fight?" Because back then I figured that it was normal for couples to fight. I figured that every couple went through a argument now and then. I thought it was normal. How wrong I was.

What I didn't know is that it was not normal. It was not normal for the kind of behavior that I was getting. I was giving so much, and yet in return all that I would get was shouted at, yelled at, told I was no good, hit, punched, bossed around, mistreated to every word of the meaning. And yet….. I would tell myself that it was okay because I loved her. I let love get in the way of my common sense. And I really wish I didn't. Because it lead me down a road that I didn't want to go down. It lead me down a path to where she set me up to take a hard fall to where I was arrested, hand cuffed, finger printed, and thrown in jail under false charges.

It took me over night to actually sit and think, and I mean really sit and think about everything that had happened to me from when I first met her, to the point to where I landed in jail all because of her. I tried to ask myself if at any point was it my fault because of where I was. And wouldn't you know it. My common sense kicked in.

It told me that it was not my fault. That I had not done anything wrong. I was not served paperwork, I was arrested under false charges, and hell, I should not have been arrested at all! For what was I doing in a jail cell at night awaiting trial? For what? She was the one who violated her restraining order on me. So why wasn't she in jail instead of me? That was the biggest question that I had, even for the judge. I felt that I was done wrong. Not just by my soon to be ex-wife, but law enforcement too. But then again, if it wasn't for law enforcement arresting me there would not have been a paper trail to help me along the way of how she was. So in a way it was kind of good that I was arrested that night. It helped me out in the long run with the start of a paper trail of her actions.

I pray to The Creator that no one has to ever go through what I had to go through six years ago. It has taken me six years to write this book. And it hasn't been a easy one. Having to get the strength up to write down what had happened. To recall what had happened detail for detail. But I didn't write the book just for me. I wrote it for you. The reader. Because as I stated before in the other chapters, you might be going through something like I went through six years ago. And I want you to know that your never alone in something like this.

I feel that it's wrong when a woman uses law enforcement just to get her way, even if she uses it in the wrong way. To lie on a restraining order to put the husband through hell and back again is not the right way to go about things. I feel that if a person wants a divorce then he or she should be honest with it and not backstab the other person as soon as he or she gets a chance to.

I am also going to fight to make it a national law that if a woman or man falsifies a Restraining Order it will be a permanent lifetime in prison. No one should have to be a victim of false imprisonment because of another person's wanting to do evil to another to get what he or she wants. Enough is enough.

Next I will write down a checklist of behavior issues that you may be experiencing. This is important because these signs may be warning signs of things to come down the road. Signs that you have to watch out for.

CHECKLIST OF CERTAIN BEHAVIORS:

1.) Is your spouse in a bad mood at times?

2.) Likes to keep secrets from you?

3.) Do you feel that there is something that he or she is not telling you?

4.) Do you feel a change in the way that your spouse or loved one treats you? Or has there been any change in your love life with this person, or have any certain situations changed?

5.) Does your spouse or loved one throw tantrums at times for no reason? Or get mad at you for no particular reason?

6.) Does the spouse or loved one show signs of jealousy towards your friends?

7.) Does your spouse or loved one act like they are keeping secrets of a love affair?

8.) Does it seem like your spouse or loved one is gone too much for no reason at all?

9.) Does your spouse or loved one show signs of mood swings?

10.) Is your spouse or loved one diagnosed with any kind of disorder? If so, keep it in mind if any other signs may show.

11.) Has your spouse or loved one made any threats towards you, or your children?

12.) If your spouse or loved one has made any threats, the best defense would be to talk to a lawyer. And if possible, find out if any restraining orders have been placed against you. Check for any warrant that may be out for your arrest that you may not be aware of.

13.) If possible check phone records if you think that your spouse may be cheating on you. It's always good to have backup or proof before any legal action when considering divorce may be taken.

14.) As I said getting a lawyer would be a good idea if your spouse wants a divorce. Always make sure to do a background check into why this person would want a divorce. If cheating is suspected, try to get every ounce of evidence that you can get in order to backup why the divorce needs to take place.

15.) If children are involved during the divorce it is important to know about the spouse's medical history considering mental stability. Child safety always comes first when dealing with children in the picture of a divorce.

16.) If police say they have a warrant out for your arrest always make sure that you have been served with Restraining Order papers first before the arrest. Otherwise the arrest is null and void. You have to be served first before a arrest can be made!

17.) Make sure to get paper copies if the divorce when the divorce is finalized.

18.) If the spouse or loved one has a medical condition that would harm the child and you feel that the child would be better off in your hands then fight for full custody! The safety of a child always comes first above all!

19.) And finally….. Are you married to a psychopath?

In Conclusion,

I know there is a lot of consideration when going through something like this. And trust me, I have been there. That is why I am writing this book to help you understand that you are not alone in the ordeal that your facing. There is always someone you can turn to for help. I had to be reminded of that.

I hope that this book will help you. And I hope that my advice will be taken in a good way, not in a bad way. I wrote this book to help others that are going through what I went through six years ago. No father should ever have to go through a nasty divorce, and that goes for the mother too. Be it male or female. And no child should ever be put in a position that would jeopardize the safety and well being of that child.

From one parent to another, I pray that my advice can help. And that you and your child will be okay in the end. Safety is what matters. I went through something awful, something I hope that me and my son will never go through again. I'm glad that our lives are better.

And remember, you are not alone. You are never alone. You always have someone to talk to. Someone always has your back even when it feels that you have no friends in the world. Even I have your back. Stay strong. And remember, things will always get better. They always do.