humor

Preamble to the Constitution of the United Vegetables of the Refrigerator Crisper
Author’s note: A friend challenged me to rewrite the preamble to the US Constitution including the phrase “…in order to form a more perfect onion” which for some reason this friend found particularly hilarious. I thought it was kind of cute too and decided to accept the challenge. It was actually fairly difficult but I do like what I managed to come up with. Is it poetry? Probably not. Is it 600+ words? Definitely not, therefore it is poetry.
By Everyday Junglist3 years ago in Poets
Fear of Living?
My first word was "ayaw," meaning "no" in Filipino. My identity crisis began around age two or three when I learned to articulate my feelings.
By Karina Thyra3 years ago in Poets
Ibuprofen
Dear Ibuprofen, I know you can't read and are nonliving but thank you. The last eight days have been very painful but you've been there for me every six hours, except that time I slept through my alarm to take you but that was my fault.
By Rene Peters3 years ago in Poets
I Don't Always Remember My Dreams, But When I Do...
Swept up in a dream Locked away, in a memory Lost magically between What is real and sensory * Surrender to sounds Stirring emotions inside
By Kelli Sheckler-Amsden3 years ago in Poets
Who are the 500?
Note: this was written as a thank you to my readers and subscribers for helping me reach this significant number...and also an enquiry as to how I did it. Any thoughts?
By Kendall Defoe 3 years ago in Poets
BEAUTY
In gardens bathed in twilight's soft embrace, Where blossoms bloom with elegance and grace, A tapestry of beauty unfurls its wings,
By Gideon Sunday3 years ago in Poets
SEX. Content Warning.
In the realm of intimacy, where two hearts entwine, A dance of passion, a connection so divine. In the quiet spaces where whispers ignite,
By Gideon Sunday3 years ago in Poets
Reality
My beliefs tell me I have free will But reality tells me there’s a path Before and behind As I watch it unfold It winds its way through the universe
By Atomic Historian3 years ago in Poets
Life
You only exist in your head Only the living know you’re dead Thank you for reading my work. If you enjoyed this story, there’s more below. Please hit the like and subscribe button, you can follow me on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram @AtomicHistorian. To help me create more content, leave a tip or become a pledged subscriber. I also make stickers, t-shirts, etc here.
By Atomic Historian3 years ago in Poets
Alexia, Are You There?
Alexia, took her shot yelled, hey stupid, don't forget Get dinner started in the crock-pot and beat-out your cigarette *
By Kelli Sheckler-Amsden3 years ago in Poets
The Cat Rules the Roost
Come in, sit down Not there or there Those are my spots Yes, you can sit there I’m glad you could Come to visit I’m Klingon, the cat
By Mother Combs3 years ago in Poets
Balloon Fashions For You!!!!. Top Story - December 2023.
Here is a silly poem that I wrote about a new passion project of mine. I hope that you enjoy it! 😊 Balloon Fashions For You by Tiffany Gordon
By Tiffany Gordon3 years ago in Poets