Just Be

I had a dream that felt fleeting; I remember bits and pieces but I didn’t quite catch the point until later that day. The dream was filled with random individuals that considered me as their friend. I’d say they were pretty great friends considering I’d forget their names every ten seconds and they’d remind me every single time. We were outside in a circle and they were talking about something but I couldn’t catch on because I was living in my head the entire time. I couldn’t tell you what I was thinking at that moment but what I can tell you is when I woke up I felt miserable. Not only because a phone call is what woke me up but also because I’ve been feeling worthless this past week. Sleeping was my favorite part of my day.

I’ve been wondering if I would ever be seen for my passions; I was feeling unworthy and not at all valuable to anyone. Since I felt this way I decided to go outside and enjoy the fresh air. The wind blew in my face as soon as I walked out the door; the breeze felt so comforting I couldn’t help but close my eyes. I sat down on my deck and looked up at the bright blue sky; a grin appeared on my face. I began to realize I could see the Earth moving in front of me; the clouds were shifting and I could feel my connection to them.

Out of nowhere a world wind of doubt entered my mind and I couldn’t help but think about all the things I haven’t accomplished.

“What am I doing with only 23 dollars in my bank account?”

“I need a career that pays more.”

“Why am I just sitting around when I should be writing, and entering myself in challenges/ contests?”

“I should be making sure my son has everything he needs.”

“It’s not that far long until he’s born.”

“What am I going to do?”

My mind ranted and raved about all the things I should be doing, all the things I should be concerned about. My heart began to pound hard against my chest; all the panic and worry consumed my whole being and I had forgotten how to live. As I began to get up from my deck, a red robin landed right in front of me and started to chirp and sing. I jolted backwards and I felt more anxious and even more overwhelmed until I looked into the beautiful birds eyes. I recognized that all of the things I thought I should be doing was only my ego trying to overtake my body. All I ever needed has been right in front of me this whole time. My dream, the bright blue sky and finally the red robin showed me the truth. It all showed me that I am already worthy, I am already valuable and I am already important. My spirit guides told me just because I may not be getting the attention and praise I desired from others doesn’t mean I am not great. I realize now the only acceptance I’ve ever needed has been my own. My attention and praise towards myself is the only love that truly matters. The red robin showed me a fleeting moment can change your whole life and put you in a new and healthier perspective. This day taught me the art of being; the art of truly living is staying in the moment and appreciating every tiny detail because the little things in life are the best things in life.