10 Ways to Fall in Love With Yourself

The chaos in the world has stirred up a lot of hate, and as a result, many of us have forgotten how to love ourselves!! Sadly, a lack of self-love goes hand-in-hand with depression, anxiety, lack of sleep, and other changes in your emotional and physical state. We start to feel like we are not good enough, like no one cares about us or loves us... I’ve even felt like my existence was pointless. We eventually slowly begin to checkout of reality to find a way to cope. Sometimes we may not notice it, but others around us probably will.

That’s okay!! This is completely normal, but YOU can fix it! I’m going to tell you the ways that I believe will help you fall in love with yourself!

1. Recognize your lack of self-love, and decide it’s time for a change!

OKAY, I get it. This is easier said than done, but if you’re reading this post right now, you’re already pretty much there!! It took me a while to realize that I didn’t love my self, but I finally began to notice the signs. I accepted bad treatment from others because subconsciously, I felt that it was what I deserved, and I did more for everyone else than I ever did for myself. I tried to pull everyone else up even though I was drowning myself, probably because I thought if I could save them, I could save myself too. I began distancing myself from my friends, and I started staying in and making excuses for skipping out on invites to dinner. I finally realized that I wanted and needed more out of life. I started reading some really great motivational books and blogs, and I began doing different activities to “find myself” and love myself. I realized I had to make a change! When you’re ready, you will too!

2. Watch Ya MOUTH!

I cannot stress this one enough!! We do not realize how much power that our words have. When we speak something negative about ourselves, our brain hears that, and if you tell it something enough times, your going to believe it. Stop saying things like “I’m ugly, I’m stupid, I’m not good enough, I’m too fat, I’m too thin, I’m never going to get this job, I’m never going to do better.” These words go out into the atmosphere and manifest themselves into your path. You don’t want this! It only keeps you from loving yourself!

I challenge you to say three good things about yourself every time you say something negative! It will really make a difference. Self-love starts with being kind to yourself! Stop hating on yourself! If you wouldn’t say those things to a friend or family member, don’t say them about yourself! ❤️

Also remember that we are not all Instagram models!! Actually, not even half of us are, so stop looking at them and thinking that you are supposed to look like that!!! You are supposed to look like you :)

3. Start your morning off with positivity!!

Remember how I said it’s important to be kind to yourself!? Well this activity/step is the best way to ensure you’re speaking life and positivity over yourself. Humans love encouragement and we crave words of affirmation, so give yourself some!! You are unique and amazin, it’s time to own up to it.

Write down or type up 4-5 phrases of love about yourself. Put these in your car, on your fridge, or on your mirror, just anywhere you will see them everyday! These phrases can be the things you know you need to work on, or they can simply be positive things you need to remember for each day!

Mine were..

“You are Beautiful!” because I struggle with self-image, “You are enough,” because I struggle with the feeling that I will never make people happy, “You will succeed,” because I struggle with the feeling that I am never going to make it, and “You are strong,” because I feel like life is too much sometimes, and “You are worthy of love,” because sometimes I forget that I am fearfully and wonderfully made!

4. Put yourself and your mental health first!!

This one was hard for me because I am the biggest people pleaser around. I tend to put others and their needs way before my own. I’m not saying that helping people is wrong, because it’s definitely great to help those less fortunate, but that’s not really what I’m talking about here.

I’m talking about those situations where your boss begs you to work a double on your only day off when you know you have tons of homework, laundry, chores, and sleep to catch up on... Those situations where your friend tells you that they need something from you for the 15th time, but when you ask them for a favor, they say “I’m too busy” or don’t respond.

Learn to say no sometimes, and remember that it is okay to take a break! We all need it sometimes. Therapy can also help in certain situations when it comes to mental health! It’s okay to talk about things! We also all need to learn to only give the same energy that we receive from certain friends. You don’t need people around who won’t be there for you!

5. Cut off toxic relationships!

A big step in your journey to loving yourself is freeing your life of anyone or anything that is holding you back. When you’re learning to put yourself first and experiencing the journey to self-love, you will find that it is important to only surround yourself with people who will bring you joy, motivation, and encouragement. Cut off the relationships that bring you down and hold you back. You don’t need friends or family that suck the life out of you, and you definitely don’t need someone who calls you names or puts you down.

6. Do something that brings you joy once a week!

Have a little me time! You deserve it! Make time for yourself, even if it’s only 30 minutes a week, and do something you love. I write when I can because it’s a way for me to escape, and a great way for me to channel my emotions and thoughts. You can read, play a game, go for a walk, go for a drive, play an instrument, watch an episode of your favorite show, soak in the bath... it really doesn’t matter, just do something you want to do! This will help you recenter and relax.

7. Take yourself on a date!

This was scary to me! The thought of going and doing something by myself completely freaked me out before, but now, I enjoy spending time alone to treat myself! Go out to eat, go to the movies, go get your nails and toes done, go to the spa, or simply take yourself to the park and have a picnic and read a book or listen to some music. Get comfortable being by yourself and learn to enjoy spending time with yourself! You’re amazing and fun to be around, so start treating yourself that way.

8. Stop accepting less than you deserve!

It’s pretty obvious that when we don’t love ourselves, we allow people to treat us with less respect, and we take more crap than we can handle. We often find ourselves in situations where we don’t take a chance for promotion or a chance for happiness because we’re afraid of failure, or we feel like we don’t deserve it. You are great, and you can achieve anything that you set your mind to do. You just have to get up, take a chance, and stop taking no for an answer! Tell yourself that you can do anything, and you will!

9. Talk about things when you start feeling down!

I know that opening up and trusting people can be hard, but sometimes it is necessary for our mental health and important for your journey toward self-love. You can confide in a friend, a therapist, a family member, an online counselor, or me! I am always here for anyone who needs support, a shoulder to cry on, advice, or prayers!

When we talk about our situation and our feelings, sometimes we can work through them and find a solution without even realizing it. Talking about things can also help you to release stress, and it can help you feel like a burden has been lifted off of your shoulders.

10. Forgive those who have wronged you & yourself!!

You may be saying woahhh Hailey! What does forgiving someone have to do with me loving myself? I have found that when we hold grudges against people and certain situations, we are only hurting ourselves, and adding weight to our soul. We may not realize it, but when we decide to let go of anger, we will find that we are no longer restrained from self-growth. Forgiving someone can allow you to release negative energy that you have been holding on to, and it will promote your emotional, spiritual, and mental health! This will only boost your happiness and increase your chances of loving yourself.

Everybody makes mistakes, everybody has those days....Nobody’s perfect! (In my Hannah Montana voice)

You are the only you in this world! No one else is like you, and no one else can make a mark on this world like you can. No one has your laugh, your personality, or your smile! No one can do the things that you can do, and no one can replace you!

It is okay to make mistakes, and it is okay to fall down. No one goes through life without failing a few times, even those people who seem like they have it all together on social media. We need to stop hiding our flaws, and start embracing them! When we mess up, we can learn from that. Use each mishap as a stepping stone towards your future, and don’t let anyone steal your joy or make you feel like you’re not where you’re supposed to be in life.

Realizing that you are not perfect, and that it’s awesome to be different is so important, but forgiving yourself is even better. When we do this, we allow ourselves to fully accept ourselves for who we are. If we can learn to love and accept others, we can love and accept ourselves! Forgive yourself and let go of any mistakes that you made in the past! You are not that same person anymore, you have moved on!

With love,

Hailey Alexandria Baldwin