“The Hubby Test…”

Before you decide to move in with your man...Take the ‘Hubby Test ..." This test prepares you for all the things you are likely to experience when you start living with a man. Please be advised this article serves to provide a humorous and comical perspective of the habits of men and should not be used as a definitive guide to behaviour of all men ! 😜

The test is best done when a woman is in in her Twenties for more positive results. The pass rate tends to decline for women in their Thirties while failure is most likely for Fortysomethings and beyond !

The Hubby Test…

• Buy a leash and tie it to a very small stone, walk around and see if you are be able to keep your stone on the leash, or if you are able to keep your stone from disappearing on you !

•Use up all the toilet paper and do not put a new toilet roll until you are sitting on the toilet and need  to wipe ...

•Drink all the milk, juice or water and put the empty container back in the fridge for you to find the next time you’re feeling thirsty ! This also applies to other items such as cornflakes, chips and many more!

•Take the TV remote and hog it all day! Do not give anyone else the opportunity to change the channel.

•Forget  birthdays, anniversaries  and other special events and tell yourself to relax !

• Always tell yourself you are hungry.

•Pee all over the toilet seat and leave it wet for you to sit on !

•Look in a fully stocked fridge or food cupboard and if you don't find your favourite food complain" ...that there is no food in the house"

•Grab your car keys and say you’ll be back soon and come back two hours or five hours later !

•Save telephone numbers of female friends in your contacts under male names !

•Leave your dirty clothing (underwear included !) on the floor in the bedroom or just near the laundry basket!

• Become a master liar ! Lie about everything and anything and when you are asked to tell the truth...lie some more!

•Wear muddy or dirty shoes and walk throughout the house!

•Flood the bathroom floor after every shower.

•Don't flush after peeing and leave the toilet seat up!

•Act inappropriate around family and friends!

•Watch sports all day and play video games all night!

•Hang out and party with friends all the time until you are so fed up with it…When will you finally grow up ?!

•Look at every shiny female that passes you by and even turn your head and look back !

•If you are going to cook at all,  then go ahead and cook with all the pots and pans in the cupboard just to make beans on toast!

•Send yourself to the supermarket to get top up groceries. If you don’t find exactly what you’ve told yourself to buy then buy nothing! Go back home empty handed.

•Pretend not to be able to find something that’s right in front of you !

•Act shady! Put your mobile phone on silent when you’re at home. Act even shadier and hide your mobile phone under your pillow at night when you are sleeping and take it with you to the bathroom even when showering!

Repeat this test everyday for 6 or so months and if you still feel like you are ready to cohabit with a man ...Congratulations !

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