My Name is Caroline Jane, and I am a VOCAL Challenge Addict

My name is Caroline Jane, and I am addicted to VOCAL Challenges.

True story.

They are like my Meth.

I was not going to enter this one, the #200 one, and then at the final furlong, I was like, "Well, what's the harm? Just have a wee punt. You know you want to..."

I do, I really do! Arghhhh... I can't stop!

The Prognosis:

I have consulted Doctor Google about it, and they have confirmed that I have all the symptoms. This is a screenshot of my phone as I type:

Fellow VOCALITES, I am 8 for 8:

(... and I only asked for 3 symptoms!)

Mood Swings:

I have got a great idea... oh, this is soooo insightful... soooo of the moment... coherent, fluid, fascinating [5 mins later] What the **** is this **** I just wrote?

Increased Temper:

Why the hell can't I access this? I know my password! This IS my password. Arghhh!

Tiredness:

I shall just get this one last paragraph down- just one more. What? I have work tomorrow? Whatevs.

Paranoia:

You cannot accuse VOCAL of being "like" Meth. OMG!!

Defensiveness:

This quote is from an author's note on one of my stories. (You have to love the backhanded defensive action here!)

The Wake of Weekend Warriors is a favourite poem of mine, but it did not touch the sides of the poetry challenge it was entered into. I understand why completely. Although, as I note at the end of it - if, as Poet Carol Ann Duffy describes, "Poetry is the music of being human," surely, there is room for some heavy metal souls.

Mwahahahaha.

#getoveryourselfCJ!

Agitation:

- insert whole of life in general -

Inability to Focus or Concentrate:

What's my name again?

Poor Judgement:

Those two words are going on my gravestone, just above the words "Let's hope God really does love a trier."

So, yeah, you could say I have a problem. But then, you could also say...

I had written nothing, nada, zilch, nowt of note for 46 years of my life, and along came VOCAL and their challenges, and suddenly I was all: "Where's my pen?!" One hundred and twelve stories in nearly 3yrs (including this one and a whole raft of haiku where I had no clue what a haiku really was beyond a syllable count) and 11 challenge placements... and yeah... I think that perhaps, maybe, possibly... I can perhaps, maybe, possibly write.

(still terrible at grammar obvs!)

Now, here is the soppy part, the part that the street-wise barrow-girl* in me wants to hide behind the humorous bravado:

Without VOCAL's challenges, the writing community that comes together every day on Facebook groups, the encouragement of VOCAL peers, and their comments and hearts, I would NEVER have achieved what I have.

Never.

Like many of you, all I ever wanted to do was to become a good writer. Until VOCAL, I thought this ambition was a pipedream. Vocal incentivised me with challenges, gave me a platform where amazing writers cut their cloth, and gave me the privilege of a level playing field to pitch alongside them. Vocal gave me an IN to a world that seemed so far away from who and what I am.

I have never had one creative writing lesson past my secondary school education. EVERYTHING I have learned has come from VOCAL, self-learning, or the amazing people who create for VOCAL. Every comment has encouraged me, whether in a Facebook group or on the VOCAL platform itself. Good, bad, or indifferent, VOCAL has facilitated perspectives that I would never have been able to reach on my own.

I have met some incredibly talented people and made some wonderfully considerate friends, all of whom want to help me and help each other get good at this writing malarkey! Is there anything more unifying than a common goal?

Is there any wonder that I am addicted to VOCAL and its challenges?

There can also be no wonder that throughout the whole of January, I have struggled to find anything of any substance to say on the matter of VOCAL ambition. Then, with one day to go, I thought - Sod it - What I have to say may seem comparatively shallow, and I may look as though I am blowing smoke up the proverbial, but I repeat, "Whatevs!" These are my truths, and if I am lucky, I may get a top story off the outlandish back of them!

Caroline Jane's VOCAL Aspirations for 2024:

1. Have fun on VOCAL and enjoy the self-growth that comes with success and failure.

2. Encourage everyone and help where I can.

3. Write. 112 stories in nearly 3 years is not a lot. I can do better!

4. Think about what to do with the skill VOCAL and all the VOCALITES have helped me cultivate.

5. Do not worry if you come up with nothing for number 4.

And there we go. That is it—my Vocal aspirations in a nutshell. From me to everyone who makes this platform - The VOCAL Team, The Creators, The Readers - please know that I love you all. Yes, I have had a couple of whiskeys tonight, so inevitably, I was bound to declare my love for the universe; still, out of the mouth of a slightly tipsy, hardworking *grocer, please take this sincerity for exactly how it was intended...

With love,

CJ xxx