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Hilariously Funny Jokes to Make Your Friends and Family Laugh

Hilariously Funny Jokes to Make Your Friends and Family Laugh

By Daniel B. Usang Published 11 months ago 3 min read
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Hilariously Funny Jokes to Make Your Friends and Family Laugh

Need a laugh? We found the funniest jokes around to tell all of your friends and family. You'll be sure to brighten someones day when you unleash a hilarious joke when they least expect it.

  • What was the rain told by the dirt? My name will be mud if you continue like this!
  • Why was the sunflower unable to ride a bike? Its petals fell off.
  • Where does an egg like to go on vacation? City of New York.
  • I recently consumed a sock. It took a lot of time.
  • Which candies do astronauts prefer? Martian bars.
  • I looked around for some camo pants, but none were available.
  • Who slips and doesn't require a bandage? a downpour.
  • I was about to make you laugh with a boxing joke, but I forgot the punchline.
  • I don't like spring cleaning. To be completely honest, I too dislike cleaning in the summer, fall, and winter.
  • How come the egg hid? The animal was a small chicken.
  • I placed an Amazon purchase for a chicken and an egg. I'll inform you.
  • Which month of the year has the shortest days? There are only three letters in "May."
  • What was spoken by the snail that was perched on the turtle? Wheeeee!
  • You folks didn't enjoy the time travel joke I was about to tell, though.
  • What do you call a kangaroo that is lazy? a potato pouch.
  • When I operated a dating service for chickens, I had trouble getting the hens to connect.
  • What does "break a leg" mean in terms of acting? the cast is what makes a play a play.
  • What applies to dry skin on a pig? Oinkment.
  • What do you call a snowman having a temper tantrum? a collapse.
  • My uncle gave his pets the name Timex.
  • Which is faster, hot or cold? Hot, because you can catch cold.
  • What did one plate say to the other plate? Dinner's on me.
  • Why do oranges wear sunscreen? So they don't peel.
  • My wife told me to stop acting like a flamingo, so I had to put my foot down.
  • What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop.
  • Where does Batman go to the bathroom? The batroom.
  • What do you call a pony with a sore throat? A little horse.
  • What did the left eye say to the right eye? Between you and me, something smells.
  • What did the mama tomato say to the baby tomato? Catch up!
  • Why didn't the melons get married? Because they cantaloupe.
  • What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.
  • How did the pig get to the hogspital? In a hambulance.
  • I'm so good at sleeping I can do it with my eyes closed!
  • Why does Humpty Dumpty love autumn? Because he had a great fall.
  • What happens when a strawberry gets run over crossing the street? Traffic jam.
  • Why did the cow jump over the moon? The farmer had cold hands.
  • A termite walks into a bar and says, "So, is the bar tender here?"
  • How does an octopus go into battle? Well-armed.
  • What do you call a pudgy psychic? A four-chin teller.
  • What do you get when you mix a cocker spaniel, a poodle, and a ghost? A cocker-poodle boo.
  • How do celebrities stay cool? They have many fans.
  • What does a pickle say when he wants to play cards? "Dill me in!"
  • How much money does a pirate pay for corn? A buccaneer.
  • Why do bees have sticky hair? Because they use a honeycomb.
  • How did the student feel when he learned about electricity? Totally shocked.

LaughterJokesHilariousFunnyComedyWriting
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Daniel B. Usang

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