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Women Take Too Much Shit From Men

Especially Online and in Their Inboxes

By Jason ProvencioPublished 30 days ago 5 min read
Generally speaking, women are far less creepy than men online. Image by Robert Owen-Wahl from Pixabay

Women have a tough go of it online. So many people connect via social media every day. Much of the time, these people do not know each other. They may not even realize they’re being catfished or trolled by a fake profile when they choose to accept a friend or a follow request.

Why do we accept requests from strangers to view our personal lives on social media? Before social media or the internet, we wouldn’t just open our front door and say, “Come on in! Meet my kids! These are my pets! Want to see what I’m having for dinner?”

Many people allow strangers into their lives on social media for networking reasons. As a self-employed man, I realized early on how important it was to know a LOT of people. Knowing a lot of people translates into more clients, referrals, and opportunities.

Other people do it for validation in their daily lives. When you hear a lot of people echoing and agreeing with your thoughts about everything, you gain confidence about the path you are on. Some love to show off work-related accomplishments, new relationships, and other things they’re proud of.

People love showing off their wonderful lives on social media. Photo by ZACHARY STAINES on Unsplash

Many social media users are quite lonely in their real life. The social media connections they make are responsible for many or all of the friendships they enjoy.

I’ve seen some pretty pathetic and embarrassing things men have said on women’s social media posts. There are ways of being funny and clever with people you don’t know very well online. Then there are the inappropriate, quite douchey things that so many men are guilty of saying to women.

Some men add all of the physically attractive women they can find on social media. They are usually the ones with shirtless profile pics, or pics of themselves pumping iron at the gym. Anything to show their bodies in action.

If you check their friends list, chances are you’ll see the majority are women. Usually, they are full of women who all look like models and fitness competitors, with very few regular people or other men.

If his entire friend list is only half-naked models, that’s a bit suspect. Photo by Moncell Allen on Unsplash

This is not to say that women never add random, good-looking men to their lists. But I’d venture to say that more men add random beautiful women than women add handsome, very-fit men. I think that many men look at social media more as hook-up websites, while women tend to make more real connections with other people.

Besides noticing that their new social media friend’s contact list looks more like a harem than a list of friends, women also notice the things they’ll say. Is he clever, or dumb as a box of rocks? Does he communicate in one to three-word sentences, or is he intelligent and well-spoken?

Getting a random message in her private messages that says, “Hey.” is quite underwhelming. Starting to converse in these PMs and suddenly getting a random dick pic is also quite disturbing to most women. Fellas, she doesn’t want to see it.

It’s not only in private messages where men fail at social media. I cannot tell you how many times I’ve seen women make a post about something in particular and a man comments something COMPLETELY random on the post.

Something that has nothing to do with the post. Usually followed with an “LOL”. I’m sorry, Chad. You’re not a 12-year-old girl, do NOT comment with an “LOL”. Man up and use “HAHAHA.” Or just stop talking.

A man of this age should not be using the term “LOL” after his comment. Photo by David Jack on Unsplash

It’s also baffling to see men interject their perspective on a woman’s post about some issue or experience they’ve had as a woman. Many men are so quick to interject an unasked-for, “Yeah, but…” comment into the post.

Be supportive of the post or better yet, just don’t comment. Nobody wants to hear “Yeah, but…” from anyone. Especially a man who wasn’t invited to comment on a woman’s social media post. Mansplaining is not attractive.

The other aspect many women deal with on social media from men is the picture comments. Men are never more in a Neanderthalic state than when an attractive woman posts a new picture of herself. God forbid, it’s a workout or bathing suit pic. Many men must be thinking, “Oh, she’s showing off her body, she WANTS my thirsty comments.”

No, she really doesn’t. Trust me, not many women likely want to see your 20 dumb fire emojis in a row, or have you comment, “Hot” “Sexy” “Hey Baby” or “Daddy likes”.

Don’t friend someone who you don’t care to get to know as a real friend. Ladies, if some random guy wants to friend you on social media, he’s usually wanting to friend your vagina.

“Hi, I’m Brock! What’s your name?”

*Makes an awkward attempt to shake hands with your vajayjay.

The next time you get a friend request from a “Bro”, remember this picture. Photo by Taras Chernus on Unsplash

Not all men are looking for a one-night stand. Or even sex or a relationship. Men and women certainly can be social media friends without ulterior motives. But you need to put your best foot forward if you’re using social media to meet women.

If a woman you don’t know is kind enough to accept your friend request, be good to her. Don’t send her a private message the minute she accepts your friend request and say, “What’s up?” Or “Hey.”

Just participate in her posts, whenever it’s natural or organic. But for fuck’s sake, don’t comment on every post and picture she puts up. Nothing says “stalker” more than the overly eager, new guy friend. “Nice guys” can be creepy, too.

Be CLEVER. Be funny. Not just on her posts, but on YOUR posts. Nobody wants to be friends with someone who has nothing interesting to say. Or has horrible racist or bigoted posts they’re constantly putting out to the world. Nothing will turn a quality person off more than being a garbage human.

If your posts are all about Trump, ‘Murica, and the flag, don’t be surprised if she boots you from her page. Photo:

Yes, it’s your page. You have the right to be a bag of shit with your views. But she has the right to 86 you off her friends list. She owes you nothing, Mr. Social Media Intruder.

I’ve posted funny jokes on social media the entire 16 years I’ve used it. I’ve also posted pictures of my wonderful family and our cute dog. Being funny will always make you welcome on someone’s friend list, so be humorous.

We get that there are probably lonely, nice guys out there. But there’s a fine line between being perceived as a nice guy on social media and a creepy, stalker type of person.

If you need to think more than 10 seconds about whether you should post any certain comment on a woman’s social media post, DON’T. Be good to women, Fellas. They deserve it for all the bullshit they put up with from creepy men. &:^)

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About the Creator

Jason Provencio

Husband, father, writer, and poet. I love blogging about family, politics, relationships, humor, and writing. Buy me a coffee?

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