What Means Respect in a Relationship?

Relationships are full of communication skills, full of norms and relationships are full of values. Each individual has norms and values you bring into a relationship. Norms and values you have been taught by your parents, teachers, clubs you went to, your (former) friends and the life events you have been through. They stick with you forever, but you also think about whether you want to implement norms and values into your daily life right now.

Norms and values are very important when you are in a relationship. What do you want to bring into the relationship from your childhood? What are the loveliest memories you have? Which ones do you want to do with your family? Which one do you want to implement into your family norms and values?

One of those norms and values is respect. What means respect?

According to the Cambridge Dictionary, respect means:

The admiration felt or shown for someone that you believe has good ideas or qualities

Politeness, honour, and care have shown towards someone or something that is considered important

A feeling that something is right or important and you should not attempt to change it or harm it

A feeling you show when you accept that different customs or cultures are different from your own and behave towards them in a way that would not cause offence

A treat something or someone with kindness and care

To accept the importance of someone’s rights or customs and to do nothing that would harm them or cause offence

A polite attitude is shown towards someone or something that you consider important

Respects are polite expressions of greeting or sympathy

Respect towards the other person in a relationship

These days, relationships are hard to keep up. Is it social media that makes us be in our bubble and not pay attention to others? Is it parents who focus on the individualization of society, and themselves? Is it because people see leaders having no respect for society?

Lots of people don’t respect others. Such as having their own opinions about topics, their habits, or even their hobbies. These days – in my view – are full of people in the world thinking their opinion counts and not the opinions of others.

When I was in high school, my classmates didn’t like me because I played the violin. I was in that case a little bit different. They couldn't handle a person who has fierce opinions, playing a musical instrument, busy with other things than clothes and going out to clubs.

When you’re in a relationship, you’re happy and you're giving in everything in your power to succeed together. The longer you're in a relationship, the more flaws you see in on another. Whether you're consent to it, or not. It is you to do something about it.

From the first time you spend time together, you see lots of good things in a relationship. But when the relationship develops, the both of you see each other's flaws. Whether you like it or not. When you don’t like it, but you think it is cute too, you leave it just like that, or you say something about it. Maybe your other half is not aware of the flaws that he or she might not want to have. But talking about it helps.

You can accept the flaws and it is you that needs to learn how to live with it, or maybe you can talk about it whether the other half could change the habits.

What if this starts to become a habit: complaining about the flaws of the other half? Most of the time, you comment on each other's habits, as they don't suit you. This can cause damage to the relationship you are in. When you only complain about the flaws of others, then there is no communication, then there is no communication in the relationship.

Something else is when you disagree as a couple, and the other half becomes angry because it doesn’t go the way you expected.

Why do you need to have respect for one another?

If you don’t have respect for other people's wishes, you only think about your ego. When you have respect in a relationship, you listen to the other person without judgment, even when you do anything with the story or advice that you just listen to.

You have respect for the quirky faces your other half just showed you. You have respect for the other half he or she is sorting out the forks, knives and spoons in the drawer.

You have respect for the other half playing a musical instrument, or making theatre shows, reading books, burning a candle, or whatever suits the other half.

Respect is giving each other space in their ideas – all the things they love to do, giving them the freedom to express themselves to be themselves and enjoy and live their (dream) life.

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About the writer

Agnes Laurens is a writer. She writes for the local newspaper. Agnes lives in The Netherlands, with her husband and three daughters. You can find her on Vocal, Medium, Elephant Journal, HubPages, Music List. Writing is — aside from playing the violin — one of her passions since childhood. She is on Twitter and Instagram. You can subscribe to my mailing list, and you can subscribe to my Thoughts. Check out her books. She has an online web store, and she has a merchandise store. If you want to be informed about my online store and my merch, please follow this link.