Things That Hurt a Cebuana

There’s a high contrast between emotional pain and physical pain.

The former is painful in a lot of ways. Though buried at the back of our minds, existing memories evoke pain as if whatever caused us to feel it just happened yesterday.

On the other hand, recalling a time when you fractured a bone will not make you feel the pain once more.

Also, it’s easier to empathize with someone who’s physically hurt compared to someone who’s suffering emotionally, unless we’ve been in the same emotional hurt very recently.

Loving is hurting. It’s a general truth that explains why most of us can get our hearts broken by the same person we love the most.

But how can we possibly hurt the person we love?

Entering the International Dating Scene

Online dating is the new norm. It’s an unconventional way of finding love that is getting more and more popular nowadays.

Both generations, young and mature, have started to accept the idea of dating someone across the globe.

Based on studies and online surveys conducted both in the present and in the past, race plays a significant role in how women are likely to be sought after by men. According to a business site, Quartz, almost all men of all races prefer Asian women.

Now, the question is, where in Asia should you start?

If you’re looking for someone who’s family-oriented, faithful, mature, kind-hearted, and has a good sense of humor, start in the Philippines.

Once you meet and start dating Filipinas, you’ll realize why they are some of the loveliest.

Cebuanas as a Relationship Partner

Most Cebuanas are attractive. They have warm eyes and captivating smiles that can make your days better.

They think of their loved ones more than they think of themselves. They have the ability to set aside their own wants and needs just to secure the well-being of the people they care about.

They also know how to have fun. They know when it’s best to have a good laugh and when it’s time to be serious.

Above all else, they’re strong and independent. Facing the adversaries of life, there’s nothing greater than their love and willingness to take care of others.

Hurtful Things You Shouldn’t Do

When dating a Cebuana, there are certain situations you’re bound to encounter.

You may not understand the times she remained silent after you hurt her feelings with something you did. When she needed your comfort most, you couldn’t give it because you were unaware of her feelings.

Avoid putting her in such a situation by knowing the things that tend to hurt a Cebuana:

1. When you question her choices and decisions.

Constantly questioning the choices she makes and the decisions she follows can make her lose confidence. It implies the idea that you don’t think she’s capable of looking after herself and the people around her.

It will make her feel insecure towards you, thinking that it’s you who’s the better person in the relationship when there shouldn't be. She will start to feel inferior to you and other people just because there’s someone who calls her out on her choices and decisions.

2. When you get lazy about things that matter.

We all have our lazy days when we just want to shut ourselves out from the rest of the world. That’s normal.

However, letting laziness get the best of you can harm your relationship. Whether it’s small or major, she’ll get hurt seeing that her words and needs matter less to you.

3. When you refuse to fight over something.

Avoiding a fight doesn’t always bring a positive note, and not everyone is ready to know this.

True, getting into an argument with someone you love can drain you emotionally. What you might not know, however, is that it can hurt your partner’s feelings when you avoid the argument altogether.

If something matters to her that much, she’d want to talk about it, even if it means getting into a fight with you. But if you dodge it, thinking that it’d be best not to argue, you’re subtly telling her it doesn’t mean the same to you.

4. When you call her out publicly.

Criticism is a part of life, and it’s always there no matter where you go.

People have habits and behaviors that are uncalled for. If you think there are inappropriate behaviors she has that need to change, tell her directly. Don’t point it out to her publicly, especially through social media.

Not only will this embarrass her in front of many other people, but doing so will also make her feel terrible a hundred times over.

5. When you crack irrelevant and untimely jokes.

It’s easier to understand this if you think of the situation in reverse.

Think of those times when she told an offensive joke that never appealed to you in any way. Seeing that it didn’t amuse you, she says, “I’m just kidding. Don’t be too serious.”

Similarly, making a bad joke towards her can turn teasing into bullying.

When you do this more often, it’ll soon put a gap between you that will pull you further away from each other every time.

6. When you have a suggestion for almost everything she does.

Suggesting what you have in mind tells her that she needs to pay more attention and it shows your concern. But when you do so in almost every situation, it may make her feel like she’s doing nothing right.

You may mean well, but the outcome can sometimes be negative. So instead, wait for her to ask you. If she seeks your opinion, willingly help.

Sometimes, you just have to remember that help isn’t needed all the time.

Giving Her Comfort When She’s Hurt

It doesn’t matter if you hurt her unintentionally. But as a man, it’s only right for you to give her comfort.

Although it may not always be easy, here are some simple tips to keep in mind:

1. Be compassionate towards her.
2. Acknowledge her being hurt.
3. Understand why she felt that way.
4. Validate her feelings.
5. Give her reassurance.

As a couple, don’t be overwhelmed by your differences.

For two people who love and care for each other, there’s not a problem that can’t be fixed. Give comfort when she’s hurt because it’s what she needs most, other than your love.