Humans logo

Content warning

This story may contain sensitive material or discuss topics that some readers may find distressing. Reader discretion is advised. The views and opinions expressed in this story are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of Vocal.

The sun is made from lemon ice cream

that tastes like cabbage!

By Ross E Fortune LombardiPublished 25 days ago 3 min read

.

When a woman says,

"No woman wants...." <...Blah, Blah!>

And/or

"Every woman wants...." <...Blah, Blah!>

.

When a man states,

"No man wants...." <…Blah, Blah!>

And/or

"Every man wants...." <…Blah, Blah!>

.

When some person rants,

"No one wants...." <...Blah, Blah!>

And/or

"Everyone wants...." <...Blah, Blah!>

.

<And don't get me started when someone feels they can dictate or assume what a different human category, That they do not even belong to wants!>

<Eg, When some 'Man' ridiculously claims, >

<"No woman needs..." ...'Blah, Blah!'>

<"All a woman needs..." ...'Blah, Blah!'>

.

Then that is usually followed by a woman (Usually an ‘influencer’ type) saying,

“If you don’t agree with me then you are not a real Woman!”

.

Then that is usually followed by a man (usually an ‘incel’ type) saying,

“If you don’t agree with me then you are not a real Man!” – “Like Me!”

.

Then that is usually followed by a person (Usually a religious or a political leader) saying,

“If you don’t agree with me then you are not a real Person!” – “Like my devoted followers are!”

.

Then it goes on… As the “Dime Store Guru Self-appointed Gate Keeper” continues…

“If you don’t agree with me then you are a fool and an idiot!” – “Not ‘evolved’ and ‘special’ – like me!”

“If you don’t agree with me then you are not a real Patriot!”

“If you don’t agree with me then you are not Loved!”

“If you don’t agree with me then you are not Valid!”

“If you don’t agree with me then you are not Loved by God!”

“If you refuse to agree with me…”

“… then you are no longer a real human!”

.

And at some point, it gets to…

“Those who REFUSE to agree with Me!

“DO NOT DESERVE TO LIVE!”

.

…And unfortunately,

…Some people listen!

…Some people believe!

…Some people follow….!

.

Err,

No.

Here is a deeply uncomfortable truth…

People are individuals of a billion varieties.

No man can speak for all men.

No woman can speak for all women.

No human can speak for all humans.

.

Not all "Bimbos" are stupid.

Not all "Nerds" are ugly and plain.

Not everyone is attracted to money...

Not everyone is attracted to health and looks...

Not everyone is attracted to physical kick-arse power and/or political ruthless power...

...While on the other hand, a lot of people are Still ALSO attracted to ALL those cliche things!

.

There are people into S&M.

Some people make romantic attachments to buildings and paving stones.

Some people like eating worms.

Some people don’t like alcohol.

Some people are racist against their Own race! Causing a deep self-loathing.

Some rare individuals are genuinely culturally colour-blind, and they are not bigoted At ALL!

Some Very rare, people are incapable of Any violence, even to protect those they love or for their own survival!

And it is theorised that 2 seemingly random people in every thousand, cannot have their spirits and wills broken by any form of torture, ever! Totally ignoring the, "Everyone breaks on the Third Day" idea!

.

…And on the outer fringes of individuality, there may even, theoretically, be people who like the 1986 film “Howard The Duck”.

Although I struggle with this one - as it seems SUPER unlikely!

.

People don’t fit into boxes, as easily and comfortably as our simple minds might like.

.

Anyone can say anything about anyone and claim it's true.

Anyone can say anything about anyone and BELIEVE it is true.

As a white male heterosexual, I COULD claim that all white male heterosexuals secretly have super psychic powers that ONLY real white male heterosexuals know about…

And that if you dare to disagree with me.

Then you must secretly not be a real male!

Then you must secretly not be a real heterosexual!

Then you must secretly not be a real white person!

Then you must secretly not be a real person!

But then again, I can say any old shit and someone, somewhere will be the exact sort of rare stupid-arse individual that will believe my crap!

I can also say

“The sun is made from lemon ice cream that tastes like cabbage!”

I could honestly believe with all my heart that,

“The sun is made from lemon ice cream that tastes like cabbage!”

BUT – That does NOT make it true!

Why?!

<Shrug>

Because I am NOT a god-like being who can change reality just because I want it a certain way.

.

.

And for me...

…THAT is the Really deeply, Painful, uncomfortable truth…

“Ouch!”

.

social mediahumorhumanity

About the Creator

Ross E Fortune Lombardi

Writer. Gamer, Goth

A (Constantly Failing To Be Funny) satirist!

[email protected]

Mutare non est meum

Cantus moriar

BLOG:

http://lombot.co.uk

Enjoyed the story?
Support the Creator.

Subscribe for free to receive all their stories in your feed. You could also pledge your support or give them a one-off tip, letting them know you appreciate their work.

Subscribe For FreePledge Your Support

Reader insights

Be the first to share your insights about this piece.

How does it work?

Add your insights

Comments

There are no comments for this story

Be the first to respond and start the conversation.

    Ross E Fortune LombardiWritten by Ross E Fortune Lombardi

    Find us on social media

    Miscellaneous links

    • Explore
    • Contact
    • Privacy Policy
    • Terms of Use
    • Support

    © 2024 Creatd, Inc. All Rights Reserved.