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The Future Looks Bleak for the Single Man

Men, here’s what you can do to save yourselves!

By Mona LazarPublished 2 years ago 6 min read
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The Future Looks Bleak for the Single Man
Photo by Reynier Carl on Unsplash

Men, you need to stop! What you’ve been doing so far no longer works and it’s killing your happiness.

Stop, reassess and be aware that it’s in your power to make it work.

Here’s what’s going on:

More and more women want nothing to do with men anymore!

And I for one can’t say I’m surprised. I feel subtle laughing coming from the women’s corner. They’re not surprised either.

According to Greg Matos, a board-certified couple and family psychologist,

Over the last 30 years, men have become a larger portion of that growing group of long-term single people. And while you don’t actually need to be in a relationship to be happy, men typically are happier and healthier when partnered.

Hear that? Men are happier and healthier when in a relationship!

Men thrive in relationships. Women thrive alone. Actually, the happiest person out there is the unmarried childless woman.

Don’t tell the church, they might have a stroke!

And I bet women know why. Actually, everybody knows.

Women have been forced into meek, subservient roles for centuries.

When you’re a slave you have to be nice to your master because you live and die at his mercy. Being sweet, accommodating, and obedient were skills women had to learn for their own survival.

Men had the upper hand in all areas of life.

Women had no choice but to rely on men to have a roof over their head (because they couldn’t own property), be cared for (because they couldn’t get a job and make money), and be safe (because they were physically weaker).

Men have been taught for centuries that they are superior beings and were used to treating women as slaves: cook for me, clean for me, bear my child. In return, men made sure their female partner wouldn’t be killed or raped by other men and she had a roof over her head and the bare necessities.

Now be honest: wouldn’t you live a more relaxed life if you had someone to do all those tedious house chores, wait for you with a hot stew, take care of those pesky kids and do everything you say as if every word you utter was spoken by God?

I bet life would be just a little easier. Especially if you were raised to believe you’re entitled to having slaves.

But once the slaves awaken and come into equal rights, they will want what was denied to them for such a long time. It was only natural that the moment women became equal they wanted different treatment from men.

And it’s also very natural that men would be really pissed. Losing power hurts like hell. If you’re used to being treated like a king, it sucks when you have to step down and be treated like a regular human being.

What do women want from men?

  • to be treated as equal partners
  • communication and emotional availability
  • equal participation in the relationship
  • to have similar values

Is that too much to ask?

Since there is such a rise in the number of single people out there, I would say — yes!

And there are 2 reasons for that:

  • Men have a very long history of privilege behind them and they feel unconsciously entitled to being treated a certain way.
  • Men are not raised for empathy, relationship, and communication. Even when they are willing to do it, they don’t know how to.

This already resulted in a huge number of lonely unhappy men and unless they do something about it, there’s going to be even more.

This perspective is supported by 3 factors:

  • Dating apps percentages: dating apps don’t favor men much, because, with so many women no longer interested in a relationships, or women who have given up on men, the greatest number of dating app users are men (62%).
  • Women’s new standards: women’s relationship standards are on the rise, which leads to a decrease in opportunities for the single man, who is usually not skilled in what women are now expecting: men who are emotionally available, good communicators, and who share their values.
  • Lack of skills: to meet these higher requirements, men will need to learn the relationship skills that were never taught to them in the past. Unless they learn how to properly communicate and connect with their partner, they will face longer periods of being single.

All this being said, I know the future looks bleak, but I also know there are ways to transform a bleak future into a bright and happy one.

Solutions that will benefit everybody, especially men:

  • Men, you need to understand that women don’t want to be single either. But they prefer it to being in relationships that don’t include communication, connection, and respect.
  • Men, if you want to be in a healthy loving relationship, you need to learn relationship skills. They will benefit every area of your life, not just your love life. The new world is based on soft skills and those who learn them will thrive. The rest will be sacrificed on the altar of not accepting change.
  • Men, save yourself from toxic people like Andrew Tate. His teachings will not get you women. They will make you lonely and miserable. He doesn’t care about you, all he’s doing is marketing your insecurities. Be aware that he thinks of his followers the same as he thinks about women: that they are dogs in need of training. And he’s training you all to make him some money.Men, get yourself a therapist, a life or relationships coach, go to communication classes. The benefits will be tremendous. Even if you haven’t been socialized for healthy interaction, that’s not your fault, but you do have the power to change your reality and change your life.
  • Men, stop invalidating your feelings. Denying your feelings is denying yourself. Cry when you’re sad, let yourselves be hugged. Make women friends. Be around women as much as possible with the simple intent of being a friend and learning how they function.
  • Men, you might be angry at how things are right now. You might feel like life is unfair and you don’t understand what you’ve done wrong. But let me tell you this: life is always unfair. And you’ve done nothing wrong. You just don’t know how to function in this new world. But it’s humanity’s adaptability to change that put us on top of the food chain.
  • Men, you can do it! Be the leaders of this brave new world. You can join it or you can get trampled in the process. The world has never reverted back in time. Don’t let people who use you for their own benefit tell you otherwise.

The way you’ve been functioning so far is making you and everybody else miserable. And all you have to do is learn empathy, lean into love, understand, communicate, and connect.

And remember women are all around, waiting for you to connect to them. It’s your turn. Rise above your conditioning and come forth! Women are waiting with open arms.

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  • zaineb abrarabout a year ago

    hi I have read many of ur stories they are too good keep up the good work this piece is epic

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