Oh no, friend zone

The friend zone, oh no. How much we enjoy hating you. This post is for you if you've ever experienced being in a friend-zone situation.

You are familiar with the procedure. You meet someone you like, go out with them on a few dates (or simply hang out), and just when you think things might get a little more serious, they declare they only want to be friends.

You feel a sinking sensation in your stomach as soon as you hear the phrase "I just want to be friends." You maintain your composure despite the downward spiral of disappointment and bewilderment you're now experiencing.

They are, after all, awaiting a response.

The first thing that comes to mind is what you say. "Yes, of course, we can be buddies."

Even if you have no interest in friendship, you nevertheless say this. Every bone in your body is urging you to jump into a passionate relationship with this individual.

But that isn't how your life is. You're actually no longer in the "friend zone" at this point.

Cognitive dissonance may be a result of being in the "friend zone." You experience a sense of disconnection within yourself since your thoughts and actions don't line up. This gap may have a number of unfavorable side consequences.

The issue with accepting friendship in this circumstance is that, deep down, you don't want that. While wishing for more, you are pretended to be their friend. Either you're waiting for them to realize that they want you too, or you're hoping that you can persuade them to change their minds while you're still friends.

We can all see the flaw in this way of thinking: this endeavor is doomed to failure barring exceptionally exceptional circumstances.

Making The Tough Decision

After a few months, you've grown weary of playing the "friend" role. It was alright for the first several weeks. You enjoyed socializing, participating in activities, attending events and gathering with others in the park. You've reached the stage where you no longer believe it will develop into something more, though.

You've persuaded yourself to tell them that you still have sentiments while lying in bed at night. You've already mistakenly perceived all of their behavior as a sign that you should only work harder and that they genuinely want to be with you.

Here's the deal: Don't even try to be their buddy if you're not truly interested in friendship.

Authenticity is the issue in this case. It's necessary for a strong friendship to flourish.

You must be open and honest with that person if you don't want the relationship to end.

I'm not saying you can't play the long game, but if you do, you must be genuine and sincere in your intentions. This shows that you genuinely want to be buddies. Great if it develops into something more. If not, you've gained a trustworthy ally in the process.

So just be honest if you're not prepared to do it.

Say something along these lines...

I wouldn't want to pose as your friend because I'm seeking for anything more serious right now.

Don't prioritize hope over reality

I don't believe being in the "friend zone" is an acceptable defense for sluggish males who lack the patience to take the time to get to know women. I believe it to be much more intricate than that.

Men are typically more eager for relationships to progress and more attracted to a wider variety of people than women. This is possibly why a woman "friend zoned" a male is the typical example of the "friend zone" cliche.

Men need to exercise restraint and either alter their connection strategies or avoid pretended friendships altogether in order to avoid this issue, as do all those who find themselves in this predicament.

The main takeaway is to choose sincerity over hope. Living without illusions and choosing the here and now above the distant hope of winning the love of that one person are both important components of accepting responsibility for your life.

That's at least how I've found it. Constantly reminding myself to accept things as they are while being aware of my own wishes for change and growth is a practice. Striking a delicate balance in life is difficult, particularly when it comes to relationships.

What has your experience been like making friends with potential partners in a relationship?