How to Do Online Dating Right

Dating…ugh so hard to find the right match. Especially in a pandemic! How on earth are you supposed to find anyone? Well, I have been there. I’m not saying I’m an expert on this subject matter. I have had a bad set of dates, but I have also had some relatively good ones and it also led me to my present relationship. I’m hoping to give someone a good piece of advice when it comes to online dating and scoping out the profile of that really good-looking guy and whether he is worth saying yes to when he asks you on a date.

The first thing you should know is that guys don’t take great pictures of themselves or can be self-conscious about taking selfies. The men that do take selfies are the ones to avoid because that can mean that they are wayyy into their looks or into their body and chances are they are the ones looking for a hook-up(but if that’s what you’re into then who am I to judge?)…he might be good looking but he is not going to treat you right so swipe bye.

Conversations are a large part of online dating. The best thing to do is to keep the conversation going for at least a week just to test the waters before diving in on a date. If he’s still willing to chat with you after three days of conversation that’s a sign that he’s willing to work for a relationship. If he asks you out to coffee after very little chat time that probably means he’s desperate for action only or he’s looking for companionship not necessarily a relationship.

Don’t try and be someone else. It’s annoying when you start chatting with someone and you seem to have a lot in common but then on the date you pretend to be someone else so they like you more. Don’t do that. You don’t want your relationship to be a lie. Be yourself and someone out there will love you for the person that you are not the person you are trying to be for them. Remember kindergarten and how easy it was to make friends because you didn’t pretend to be someone else? Go back to that and be yourself.

Don’t drag it out. If you are not feeling a connection with someone just tell them. Tell them “it was nice chatting with you but I am not feeling this anymore”. Ghosting is not cool especially after upgrading to the texting phase. Sure, it is different if you are chatting on the app and you stop but once phone numbers are exchanged it changes things.

Don’t cancel on a date unless if it is a legitimate reason. That’s just leading someone on…you got a date and then you bail last minute. I feel that this happens to men most of the time and I don’t know why. You were talking to them things were great but as soon as they want to meet you, you cancel? That does not make a lot of sense. It is just one date. If you do not like them by the end of the first date just let them go then…don’t cancel. Guys also like to put in effort into the way they look and feel and it lets a guy’s self esteem go out the window.

Here’s the thing about online dating…it is not for everyone. To date online takes a bit courage and skepticism when approaching a date. You cannot believe everything they say in a profile, sometimes their pictures are not what you are expecting. Be alert because there are many messed up people out there and if while messaging they get inappropriate with you report them right away. Do not wait for someone else to do it for you.

On a first date it is a good idea to meet for coffee. That way if it goes badly you can easily duck out without feeling guilty. First date with dinner can be very awkward so make sure it’s something light and fluffy not too serious.