Emotional Abuse is Still Abuse

Though most people think about physical abuse when they think of unhealthy relationships, the truth is that emotional abuse can be even worse. It can be really hard to spot, which means that the abuser can often get away with a lot more than if he or she just left bruises on the person they love. Even worse, the victim is likely to believe they aren't a victim, and the abuse will continue for months or even years.

So, what is considered emotional abuse? Here are some things that you need to consider.

Emotional abuse looks different in every relationship. What may work for one relationship won't for another. This means that a simple teasing may only be that, while to a victim, these words may make them feel like their whole world is crumbling.

Often, abusers will say and do things to humiliate their partners in public. They may make jokes and tease them in public, knowing it makes them uncomfortable. The more people around, the worse the abuse is.

They don't even need an audience. They may say things to the victims so that they don't have any self-worth by the time they are done with them. These people can't imagine finding anyone who would love them the way they are, since they are not good enough for their abuser.

They may even exert power over their partner by not allowing them to do certain things that they want to do. They may keep their loved ones from hanging out with family and friends. They may tell them who they can and can't talk to.

The abuser may even do this by spending all of the their time with the victim, so that he or she can't spend time with anyone else.

Denial is a big part of emotional abuse. If the victim brings up something that hurts their feelings, the abuser may claim that it was never said.

They may even get into their victim's heads, making them believe that it is all their fault. They made their abuser say such awful things about them.

As fewer people want to hang out with the couple, the abuser may make the victim feel like it is his or her fault. They may say things like nobody likes you because of this or that.

Though there isn't any fear of physical abuse, there is an implied threat. The victims fear that if they do something wrong, they will have to pay for it. They know if they screw up, their life isn't going to be pleasant for a certain amount of time.

The abuser forces the victim to stay with him or her, no matter what. They may threaten to hurt themselves or even commit suicide if they are ever left. They may even warn their partner that they will never be able to live without them. After hearing that for so long, they may start to believe that they won't be able to do anything without their abuser.

They can also make the victim completely dependent on them for everything! The abuser will push everyone away, so their partner must rely on them for everything, including their finances, friendship, home, and so much more. This only makes it that much harder for one to leave.

This can lead to isolation. When a partner is isolated from family and friends and must rely on their abuser for everything, it can be really hard.

Emotional abuse can be worse than physical stuff. Instead of having to hide bruises, your partner may be belittling you in front of others. He or she may also be working on your self-esteem so that you feel like you can do no better than him or her.

Even worse, the abuser may push people away and isolate the person that they love. They may keep their family and friends away, telling their partner that nobody wants to spend time with them. They may make them dependent on them, making it even harder to leave.

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Previously published on Medium and/or Newsbreak.