Reasons Why You Shouldn't Have an Affair

The reality is that many people have affairs. In fact, they come out of them feeling like there is nothing wrong with what they did, because they had their reasons. I recently wrote an article about why people feel it is ok to cheat. If you haven't had a chance to read it, you can check it out right here. 

That being said, I don't think (along with most people) that it is ok to have an affair when you are in a relationship or married. In fact, here are some reasons why you shouldn't start an affair.

It hurts a lot of people. Not only are you hurting yourself, you are hurting your loved ones, including your spouse or partner, children, family, and even your friends. 

Though you may not be thinking about anyone else, your children are going to have to deal with the mess that you have made of your relationship. They may find themselves dealing with divorce or even just people talking about their parents around them. Do you really want your children to hear gossip about you, just because you had to have an affair?

Though it may feel exciting and new, the truth is that the grass is never greener on the other side. Many people start an affair because they are not currently happy with their situation in life. If they lose their current relationship due to the affair, it is only a matter of time before they realize what they have lost. 

If they decide to continue the affair after their current relationship fails, their baggage will follow them. It may not take much time until they are dealing with the same issues that they had before they started the affair.

It is never a good idea to make decisions by emotions only. Falling in love can be exciting, but attraction and emotions shouldn't be the only reason you start an affair. It may feel romantic, but it really is just cheating on your spouse or partner.

These can also feel like an addiction, like a drug. Many people rush into affairs, without thinking about the consequences and dealing with whatever is going on with their lives.

Keeping secrets can be harmful to one's health. Though an affair can be exciting, the truth is that it won't be long until lying becomes a way of life. This leads to feelings of guilt and shame, which can affect health. 

Many have trouble sleeping because of everything that is going through their heads. They may struggle mentally, as well as physically. Once caught and their lies are discovered, a weight may lift from their shoulders, even though they may have a lot more work to do to repair their marriage. 

The more partners that a person has, the more likely they are to get a sexually transmitted disease. Even worse, they can pass it on to their spouse, which can lead to them figuring out that their partner wasn't faithful to them!

If one's relationship doesn't survive the affair, it could also affect any other relationships in the future. Many people say, "Once a cheater, always a cheater." 

When asked why the relationship ended, a person has to come clean that they cheated on their spouse. This may make others leary to start or continue a relationship because they don't want to have to worry about their partner having an affair.

Though an affair can feel really exciting, the truth is that it can hurt a lot of people. Not only are you hurting the one that you supposedly love the most, but your friends and family may struggle with the news. Your children are going to end up hearing all about it, which can make it even worse! 

Affairs can also lead to sexually transmitted diseases and other health problems, due to the guilt that you may be feeling. Lying can really make a person feel terrible, which can lead to trouble sleeping and other health concerns. 

You also have to think about the future. If your current relationship doesn't last, you are going to have to tell all of your new partners that you had cheated before. There is a good chance that they won't stick around to hear your side of the story! It is much better to work on your relationship or break up and move on.

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Previously published on Medium and/or Newsbreak.