Allowing Slow Days In Social Media Society

We live in such a fast paced world, working every spare hour, seeing family and friends, education or other learning, perfecting your hobbies, skill building and then self-care, usually while catching it all beautifully, to share on some timeline or feed.

Almost everyone feels some pressure to not only be busy at all times, but to prove that to followers and friends as well. Everyone has probably said or heard “pics or it didn’t happen” and that’s probably more true, in our minds, than ever.

Gym selfie, meal selfie, walk selfie, friends date selfie, relationship date selfie and that’s Great, if you love sharing and you love the creativity and connection that social media can bring to our lives, but it’s so important to be mindful of “am I getting enjoyment from this?” About the activities and also about sharing them. I missed living in the moment and seeing things through my eyes, instead of a screen.

For example, I’m really enjoying writing and getting thoughts out of my head onto paper and I want to share that, but with instagram, I’ve not been feeling sharing. I used to share every single thing I did outside of the house and then during lockdowns, I, at first, started posting such little things and the pressure to appear interesting just became a turn off of social media as a whole, personally.

I got into such a comparison mindset, is my house as nice? Is my outfit as nice? Is my photography as nice? Is my coffee as nice? Are my plates as nice? It got pretty insane and it’s not even something I Have to do, I wasn’t doing it for a living or income, I couldn’t face social media after a while and the break felt really nice and then, it became something that just didn’t cross my mind so much.

I feel like being busy and ready and curated has become such a thing, we live in a competitive society where numbers and trends, possibly, mean more than fun and genuine enjoyment, to a lot of people.

I feel like the combination of these things are all why we forget to take time to do nothing. I know that I developed a mindset where I wouldn’t take a photo unless it looked shareable, even for myself, but I love taking photos, if just to look back on memories, no matter what I or my environment looked like at the time, just purely to remember.

My social media break gave me time to reflect and appreciate not focusing on if things looked “postable” and that, in turn, reminded me to relax more. Then came leaving behind a full-time job that made me cry every day and being part-time and recently struggling with a few different illnesses (from getting glandular fever repeatedly and then unrelated, unexplained chest and breathing issues), all at the same time, which forced me to take the break that I’d been so badly wanting.

But then the guilt set in and I felt bad, so, to the point of exhaustion, I pushed through my chest injury, causing pain and negative emotions, to get things done and, of course, there are some exceptions, you need to eat, care for your needs and you maybe should reach out and keep certain connections well cared for, but you have to be healthy, physically and mentally, to even be able to do so.

I’ve heard of so many people, from family, to friends, to news reports of all sorts of people pushing to “be busy”, no matter what the outcome, valuing social opinions and twisted beliefs over their lives and wellbeing, to varying different extents.

I’m really trying to be more mindful and after not sleeping last night and getting up, hurriedly, for a doctors appointment, this morning, I came home and had the desire to have a “lazy day”, which, at first, I cringed at, even the term “lazy”. So instead, to make it more comfortable in my mind, I talked to myself about needing to be slow, the craving to sit still and be slow.

Just be slow, we’ve all heard “Slow and Steady wins the race”, well I believe in that, and today, I’m having my slow section of the race, so tomorrow I can be powerful and boss my duties at work and then be there to be social over the weekend, I’m charging my batteries because over the next few days, I’m busy, so won’t be able to put time into recharging properly and that’s okay and that’s necessary and important for all of us.

My morning has looked like the above photo, wrapped in blankets, with just my dog, animal crossing and YouTube. I’m not a fan of being in bed all day, I associate it with when I was depressed and couldn’t do much else, but now I get to appreciate that my bed can be a positive space, which I am lucky that I get to choose to enjoy while awake, if I so desire, which today I do.

Now I’m going to submit this post, make a very easy dinner of filled pasta and cream cheese, watch some more content and maybe take a bath, or read, or both. My only task later is to help my partner make a meal and to enjoy a relaxing evening, watching the Eurovision semi final 2 and having a good night’s sleep to be ready for tomorrow, guilt free, appreciating my mind and body and showing myself the respect that I deserve and that I show to others.

I wouldn’t tell a friend or my mum, or partner to feel awful for having a day relaxing, for getting better, for refuelling themselves when necessary, so I’m saying out loud, “you deserve this, need it, even, enjoy it” and that’s what I plan to do.

Take care and remember to be slow, when you need it. I hope this helps someone, to some extent, just to know, you are not alone within your need to relax.

H x